I think in future I will say and “I’m presuming there is no planned maintenance, it’s just on one sit story blah blah blah” rather than ask if they have any planned as this implies permission. I have a feeling as well that even if id asked these HOs would have said no as it was introduced as over running… As all builders do!!
Thanks for helpful comments and advice 
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@Reliablesitter I would have been more than ‘a bit peeved’. If you are not assertive as a sitter, you are setting yourself up for people to take advantage of you. In that case, you are likely to have sits that not only disappoint you but also may jeopardize your safety, or have you accused of something you did not do.
You don’t need to ask the question of whether anyone else might be at the home. Instead, I suggest a general question (which I use) of confirming that there is not anyone else who has access during your stay, or if they do (cleaner/gardener) they are aware of the dates you are there and will wait for you to allow them access (especially if it’s to inside the home).
When asked if others can have access, for any other reason, you can firmly say that it is against the third party policy.
I have had people come to a property without notice to me when I’m on a sit. I politely say that I can’t allow anyone else to be at the home and I call the owner in their presence and sort it out. You can still be polite and firm at the same time. If it’s in person, just add a smile too. 
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In a video call you can phrase it in a brief and honest way, such as “Are you expecting anyone else such as workers or family or such to be entering the home while I am sitting?”.
That sort of question leaves it as you being pro-active - either as someone who is okay with that or not it allows a sitter to know and make their choice on the sit without the HO knowing which way you’ll be leaning based on their answer.
They won’t know if you’re not okay and weeding them out or if you don’t mind as long as told beforehand and want to be aware as a good sitter.
It’s a darn shame anyone, HO or HS, has to at times find methods like this due to the minority who aren’t upfront or honest about things. But! We all gotta do what we gotta do during interviews sometimes.
As to the review, if you stick to polite and factual it shouldn’t put off respectful and honest future HO’s. An accurate but politely worded review of something like “The HO’s did not tell me during the interview or at any time prior to the sit that they planned to and had workmen coming into the house as well as family staying during parts of my sit. This is against THS policy and I feel their plans should have been shared so that I could have turned down the sit or chosen to do it while being aware of this”.
Something that conveys the actual happenings but is not aggressive or angry sounding… reasonable, polite, and factual.
HO’s who are the sort who wouldn’t do this won’t tend to take this against you when expressed in such a manner, whereas something angry or rude would be off-putting not due to the situation but your tone.
They’ll be the sort who understand the policies and understand that any possibility like that is something that some sitters are uncomfortable with and others are not but that they need to know for it to be a fair and safe match for both parties. Some HS’s are fine when these things are within certain bounds and they know what to expect ahead of time, some are not - and good H/POs don’t want to run the risk of a sitter who is VERY not okay with it and will (very reasonably) refuse the sit when put in a situation of “surprise!” like you got.
Reasonable folks on both ends know that the exchange needs to be honest and mutually suited for it to work out well for everyone.
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Exactly, I feel you on the last minute, wait til you’re already there thing… it’s dishonest and sets up for a negative exchange even if the sitter would’ve been fine with it if they’d known.
I’ll happily do a lot of sit situations where a home needs work or is actively having workmen come in to get things done - IF the owners are upfront about the fact that might be the case.
I mentioned it in another thread recently, but I had one wonderful couple and sit where there had to be workmen in and out of the house unplanned by them. But they reason was the workers hadn’t finished a renovation on time and most importantly the HOs had told me from the start that they were having a ton of renovations done, to include that one. So I knew their home was being finished and while workers being there for a delayed portion they kept messing up wasn’t expected I know these things can happen. They’d been honest and informative in their interview and that was the key.
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What if something happened at the home just before the scheduled sit that needed attention? Would you rather the HO cancel the sit altogether? Or spend a day or couple days dealing with who ever has to fix the issue?
Twice this year I’ve had exactly that happen. Days before I was to go to Europe for three months, I discovered there was a leak in the pipes to my house resulting in a huge water bill and 10x usual water consumption. I arranged to have a plumber come out and address the issue. He was available two days after I left. I spoke with my sitter and she was fine to handle the communication in my absence. It arranged for payment and it took them two days on my property to do the work.
Two months ago, a week before my current trip, I discovered a major issue with a beam in my patio structure that had Ben built 7 years ago. I contacted the contractor, he came and said they’d fix it. I contacted my sitter and she was fine with this being fixed while I was gone. It took two weeks for them to fix it, but they were on my property a couple hours three times. My sitter coordinated directly with them so it was worked around her schedule.
The alternative in both cases would have been to cancel fairly last minute. After all, this is TrustedHOUSEsitters isn’t it? Things happen at a home that need to be addressed. As sitters it seems to me that we should be prepared for accommodating builders or tradesmen in some situations.
Both of the examples in your experiences are ones that are great for things a HO should contact the potential HS and discuss it. It may mean a cancellation, but for most it’s about the communication and expectations being open and understood.
If it’s the day of them leaving and the sit starting and the only way things can go is to tell a sitter after they arrive… no one can predict everything in life that can happen and most people, HO or HS, have a basic grasp of this fact. But the situation(s) being discussed are those where the owners have known and had time to inform the planned sitter.
Being willing to deal with the workmen and related issues as the HO via phone or internet also makes a massive difference. Especially if all planning and ways to reach the HO directly by the workmen is arranged so that the sitter only need be there rather than try to manage the renovation to some extent. My renovation experience was one in a country where I don’t even speak the language of the workmen… but in addition to alerting me ahead of time the HOs had made such arrangements with the company for anything hand gestures and some light GTranslating couldn’t cover.
Knowing the day or week or three before that this will be the case is at minimum polite to inform a sitter. It may mean a cancellation as some are absolutely not comfortable with such, sure, but the repeated key issue is “Surprise! You’ve arrived and we didn’t tell you til now!” for most people.
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Hi @Reliablesitter
Sorry to hear of your issues. I ask now when I have a pre chat video call with a HO if I should expect any third party persons during my sit? Of course the HO may lie but at least I can make the HO aware it’s against THS rules for such unless we both agree. And of course I can withdraw my application before the sit.
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@Reliablesitter , I do as @richten1 does. In my pre-sit chat I ask if anyone will be coming to the house while I’m there-- this covers family, neighbors, cleaners, gardeners, etc. I also inform them that THS does not allow third parties, so all is sorted before booking the sit.
Thanks mars. Can I just ask how you do this? you ask them and then you tell them that’s it’s not ok? I guess that’s the bit I’m struggling with. Or do you say cleaners are OK etc? I’m genuinely interested how you and ritchen1 phrase this as I would feel really awkward saying can I expect anyone coming to the house and then saying I’m afraid they can’t. Just for the record as I said beforehand it was all said when I arrived, builders running over and relative due to something or other which I won’t detail here. Thanks
@RumpusParable yes, I agree communication is key, and should have happened and would have been polite and respectful. I would say it’s a case of being seen as ‘staff’. However that said your experience sounds much more extreme. I would refuse to get involved in negotiating with contractors and HO. I think that’s definitely over stepping what should be expected from a sitter.
To be honest I think you should have waited and arranged to do the latter repair on your return. Obviously if it is an emergency repair then it would require immediate attention but being respectful to sitters I think if a repair can wait until it inconveniences you rather than them then that’s the right choice.
@Snowbird with all due respect I think it’s a little unfair to blame this one on my lack of assertiveness 
. Even if I had of asked that question the answer would have been no as both things were presented as ‘last minute’ changes. I will, however, make sure I ask in future sits about confirming that there is nobody expected to be coming or staying at the house during my stay. I think from the answers here we can see there is a spectrum of sitters tolerance on these matters.
I usually say something at some point of the video chat “just checking if you plan to have any housekeepers or gardeners during the stay in case I need to there to unlock the door! I’m fine with the occasional visitor or worker during the day as long as I have a little bit of a heads up”
One of my biggest fears on here (and so far this hasn’t happened) is someone will randomly walk into the house with no notice. I get how hard it is being assertive with HO! It’s something I’ve gotten better at with experience!!
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I once had the ordinary dog walker walk in on me in the morning. At least I was dressed!
(Their mistake, they had been told by the HO that they were not needed.)
Hi @Reliablesitter , Here are a couple examples:
Me: Will anyone be coming to the house while I’m there?
HO: The cleaners come on Thursdays and my son lives down the road.
He may be stopping by.
Me: I’m fine with the cleaners but just so you know, THS does not allow third
parties to be present during the sit.
HO: OK, I didn’t know that. I’ll ask him not to stop by.
Me: Will anyone be coming to the house while I’m there?
HO: The kitchen cabinet doors are off because they are being painted.
The painters may be coming while you’re there.
Me: THS does not allow third parties to be present during the sit, so
it would be better if they come before or after the sit.
HO: OK, they’ll wait until I get back.
It’s very relaxed and not awkward at all. Don’t feel uncomfortable about it. I don’t.
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Thanks Mars, much appreciated.
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Agreed. In both cases I let them know as soon as I knew. And both were fine with taking on the responsibility, as I expected they would be. The first sit was three months and the second one was two months, so, in the whole scheme of things cancelling the sit rather than deal with minimal time to make the necessary repairs seems like a no brainer. Cancelling a 3 and 2 month sit would have been extremely disruptive for me and the sitters.
I’ve got travel planned from October 2023- March 2024. I had a two month sit (the one in discussion here), then I’m home for two weeks, them I’m gone for a month, then home for a week, then gone for two months. I had no other choice. It is no small task to get a contractor to fix something they built 7 years ago and they were will to do it for free, and then. No way would I have let that opportunity go for over 5 months. I would have been okay with cancelling if the sitter had not wanted to do this, but, she had bought a plane ticket. Further, it was a two month sit, with 2 indoor/outdoor cats, and I made my car available to her. Seems like a very fair trade to me, as it did to her as well.
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@Reliablesitter Thank you for your reply as It gives me an opportunity to clarify what I had said. Unfortunately, those of us who have been on the forum for years have seen newer sitters who have been taken advantage of by owners and have not felt comfortable asserting their rights to be treated with respect. That was my primary concern. I related well to @Cleeflang’s response (#26 above) and felt the closing statement in that post, of ‘in some situations’, was an excellent one. For some sits I have certainly accommodated an owner’s request which was reasonable and yet likely would not have conformed to the TrustedHousesitters guidelines. However, in your scenario, where it was a ‘last minute’ change, I did not get the sense that the owner respected you. That was my concern. For most of us, the more sits we do, the more experience we get with handling different scenarios.
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