Hi,
Is this a thing?!
I had a sitter last year , he was ok but for various reasons i wouldnt want him sitting again.
Twice now in the last 2 months he has messaged me and asked to stay with me as he is between sits and in the area, offered to either pay or help with cats in return.for staying 5 days first request and 3 days second request
Declined both times, second time more bluntly.
Sounds like he’s offering to pay, but hoping you won’t take payment, or maybe he simply feels closer to you than you do to him, whereby he feels comfortable enough to ask… or maybe he hasn’t discovered any couch sitting websites if he’s stuck for cash for normal hotels.
There are websites where people can offer a bed to stay in exchange for helping the owners out with some sort of task, with animals, painting, decorating, gardening, so maybe he’s on one of those sites and presumes everyone knows that things like that go on.
We’ve gave the odd past HO the heads up if we want to stay for longer in their particular area to ask if they were thinking of taking another break. I would say that’s normal (ish).
We’ve also had the odd HO kindly offer us a place to stay in between sits with them, which is lovely and beautiful of them, but that’s the opposite way around to what you are saying.
I guess it is no problem for a sitter to reach out and express an interest in a sit. And it is no problem that you would like to use other sitters for whatever reasons you might have, that could also be get to know more people, build up a network and whatever. If it is a strain to hear from him I think it would be best for both of you to just state that you look for different sitters. No need to say «because of you» either.
Sounds like you don’t even have a sit listed and he is contacting you through the inbox from the sit he did do with you. I would be VERY blunt with him and suggest that he is in no way welcome and that THS is basically a business transaction and not a personal one. You owe this guy nothing whatsoever so I wouldn’t be too happy if someone was doing this to me. Be firm - very firm, it’s creepy to be honest. 
@Kernit I am wondering if you gave him a five star review and therefore thinks that you would be happy to have home back ( Unaware of your reservations ) ?
We have had owners contact us to ask if we are available to come back / or available for paid drop ins as a private arrangement- so maybe he sees it as similar thing.
You can reply that you will list any dates publicly on THS when you next need a sitter . To avoid disappointment, please do not contact you in the meantime as you are not interested in making a private arrangement outside of THS.
Thanks All
I dont have any sits I need a sitter for, he is whatsapping me when he has a few days to fill in London, and he is the one sitter I wouldn’t have back !
Just find it odd
As a sitter, I’d never do as you described.
Generally, I often get invited back without indicating I’d do a repeat at all, and I usually decline, because I enjoy variety.
I do occasionally let a host know if I’d like to repeat a sit if they’d like me to return down the line. No pressure, of course, I note. As a result, they’ve offered me sits they hadn’t listed yet, but had made travel plans for. Unfortunately, though, I couldn’t make some of those dates work.
I wouldn’t offer to repeat unless I’d received a rave review and loved the pet and location and had gotten along well with the hosts.
If he doesn’t take the hint and it sounds like you’ve been very clear I’d block him. It’s more than a little bit cheeky on his part & over stepping boundaries.
Is it just me that sounds little bit weird?
Yeah, I feel like that’s abusing the platform.
Not just you it’s sounds very weird to me too.
Very odd, you have been very patient and polite up to now. Just block him or don’t respond to further messages. He has definitely overstepped a boundary.
@Kernit this sounds highly inappropriate and a bit creepy I might add especially if you and the sitter did not form a friendship during his sit. The HOs I sat for in Munich (most especially) and I formed an instant friendship from the initial video chat for the sit until the present. They explicitly invited me back for a regular holiday visit, we celebrated the kitties 1 year birthday together via WhatsApp video while I was in Vietnam. We still chit chat regularly. I would definitely visit with them the next time I’m in Munich because they feel like family to me. It doesn’t sound like you developed such a friendship with this sitter. I recommend being very direct with him. I’m concerned since he knows where you live and could possibly just turn up out of the blue.
I wouldn’t worry about that. Not at this stage. But it he contacted you again, I would reply as @Silversitters have suggested.
I think what he is doing is not common at all. I also think he has no manners.
Thanks everyone
He had no manners when he pet sit for me which is why he would not be welcome back.
I just found it odd that he has asked to stay twice when i dont have dates advertised or even need a pet sitter.
Just wants a free place to stay i guess in London
In my experience some people believe that they are forming true friendships with anyone they spend time with; many people like to think that they have friends scattered around the world that they could go and visit at the drop of a hat. Thankfully, most of the time this does not happen.
I was taking French classes on an online platform a few months ago and the never-met-before teacher said “I’d like to travel more next year; who knows, maybe next summer I’ll come to your place”. And this was our the first time talking!
In our personal life (not related to sitting), my husband and I had an acquaintance who asked by postcard (those were the days…) whether he could stop by our place on his way back home. We didn’t even reply, but sure enough, two weeks later he was at the door of my place of work. We didn’t turn him away, but thankfully he stayed for only a couple of nights.
Hopefully your ex sitter got the message by now, otherwise, I’d block him.
@Kernit
Are you saying he is asking to stay with you while you are there? Not just looking to pet sit when you are away.
If that’s the case, it’s extremely inappropriate.
One can always ask. But of course not more often than once.
I have been on couchsurfing etc, mostly hosting but also using it as a surfer. Last month I contacted guests that had been in my place. I stayed two nights with a couple in Calais, one night with a couple near Antwerp. And one former guest in Hasselt invited me when she saw on my Facebook that I was in Belgium.
I also got in touch with HOs that had done a dog sit for. I was welcome to stop by for a visit at their new place but because of time constraints and weather I did not get to do that. Maybe some other time.
Unfortunately, the brand-new THS messaging system does not include such basic functionality.
Yes and asked twice now!
The guy is WhatsApping the OP.