I sat once for someone who was particular about cleaning.
She mentioned it in her listing, with her expectations clearly specified.
Then when I arrived, she showed me where the vacuum was and how to use it. (Some vacuums are unusual, or hard to figure out, and sometimes they’re difficult to find, in the home!)
She showed me all the cleaning supplies and their locations, and said “I don’t expect you to clean the whole house, just the areas that you use.”
Message received!
I cleaned the heck out of all the spaces I used, and then some.
I always carefully clean, but I paid special attention to this home, because it was clearly important to her.
I think you can get your message across in a fun and friendly way. You can make your expectations clear from the listing, to the welcome guide, to your handover, without seeming overly demanding.
Clear communication from both sides re: expectations is always a good idea. And it starts in the listing.
Here’s another example: At the beginning of a sit when someone was showing me the litter box, he showed me that there was a small broom and dustpan right next to it, and told me how he likes to sweep up any stray litter. He didn’t demand that I sweep up after the cat daily or anything, but he was letting me know the “culture” of his household.
Or once, somebody pointed out to me “the broom we use to sweep the porch.” No demands made, but now I know more about how they keep their home, and where the specific tools are. Very useful information!
All that said, sometimes you’re going to get sitters who are “perfect,” and sometimes ones who are a little more “casual,” who wouldn’t even notice a hanging cobweb. You do your best to be clear about your expectations, you do your best in your screening process, and then you hope for the best!