@Debbie …but would the HO have an opportunity to leave a review in response to the negative review from pet sitter?
What’s nerve-wracking is that it looks like the second set of overnight guests are staying another night. Thank goodness I’ll be back tomorrow.
Yes you can respond to the negative review (if it happens) with an unemotional, factual answer that ties in with your original review and then there’s no more comeback (much like TripAdvisor). Anyone with a brain will see who’s telling the truth. It sounds as if your goodwill has been well & truly taken advantage of. #keepusposted
Although this is the owners forum, answers seem very sitter-biased to me
Just because they agreed to the guests does not shift the responsibility or the blame from the sitter to the host. Just asking to host a party in the middle of the sit is outrageous and leaves he HO in a terrible position (Go and say no to someone who is currently in charge of your home and pets…)
Your concerns are valid. If I were the pet parent, I would notate this in your review. Otherwise the sitter will think nothing of the circumstances and will surely think it will be fine to do again in the future.
Yep. Your sitters are violating THS rules and common sense by not notifying you and seeking your permission for visitors. Especially overnight visitors. The grief that’s been dished your way over trust and privacy issues is out of line once you’ve picked up on unsettling sitter behavior. Whether you picked up on that unsettling behavior because your neighbors raised concerns or because of outdoor cameras you made the sitters aware of per THS policy, it is entirely reasonable for you to take a closer look at what’s going on and, in your case, what is going on should raise all kinds of red flags.
In the one sit where our sitter had her unannounced boyfriend staying over with her, she blew off the questions we asked saying that he is a dear man who the cats would love. Maybe yes. Maybe no. We have no idea because we never met him, talked to him or was given a name. We only know that all 3 of our cats lost significant weight during our 2 week trip. That weight loss was unusual based on our other experiences with THS sitters.
HOs extend trust when turning over their pets and homes to sitters but that trust is not unbreakable.
I wonder if some of the conflicting opinions on whether security cameras are intrusive is due to regional differences and presumptions about what “monitoring” camera footage actually entails.
In terms of the regional question, I know that household cameras are nearly ubiquitous in the US. Sitters sitting in the US should expect that their movements are being picked up by cameras whether belonging to the homeowner or to the neighbors. The darned things are literally everywhere. I get the sense that this is not the case in much of the rest of the world where sitters might feel their existence is intrusive. Thus the need for THS’s requirement that HOs announce the existence and location of such cameras.
In terms of what “monitoring” video footage actually involves, most camera interfaces present thumbnails for the video clips collected during the day. It takes me just a glance at those thumbnails to see if anything unusual is going on on the home front. And, yes, I do check those thumbnails while traveling just as I check my emails and messages. It’s rare to have anything that gets my attention enough for me to play the 20 second video clip to learn what’s going on. On only one occasion have I seen anything concerning related to a sitter. On that one occasion, I unapologetically checked every video clip captured.
How do you know this?
I’m not for one moment advocating for any sitter to disrespect the wishes or hospitality of a host, but communication between the two of you seems to be rather abysmal. Are you in fact communicating with your sitter at all, beyond the conversation where you gave the green light for guests (with child-exceptions)? Why not pick up the phone, or send a message via your agreed communications platform, and voice your concerns, instead of monitoring the situation and becoming more and more stressed?
Communications are key, and should be 2-way for a successful sit.
@RMRL what did the sitter say when you spoke to them about the first set of overnight guests ?
I never mentioned the first overnight sitters. I thought about saying something, to the effect of ‘my neighbor has brought to my attention’ but I didn’t. I didn’t really think they’d do it again, much less let this second couple stay two nights in a row.
I think it’s not fair to label communication between the parties as abysmal. It sounds like there was plenty of initial and follow-on communication but the sitters omitted critical information from those communications. You seem to be suggesting that the HO dropped the combinations ball by not immediately contacting the sitters once she was aware something was amiss. How is that supposed to work? The HO is some distance from home and the situation she faces is a fait accompli. Any form of challenging the sitter’s actions, no matter how gentle, risks escalating the situation from very unsettling to a full blown crisis for the HO. How to proceed in dealing with anyone when your trust has been abused is dicey no matter the situation. Dealing with it from afar piles on the stress.
Been there, done that and very much did not like it. We had lots of communication with our sitter before the sit including a long face to face sit down in our home. She shared a lot of information about her kids, her travel plans, her interests, her background, her life philosophy and her work. She seemed very nice and caring worthy of the Trust part if THS. But she never bothered to inform us that she would have overnights and weekend sleepovers with her surprise boyfriend as well as extended visits by a girlfriend. The ultimate option I faced when I learned of her lack of candor was to try and convince myself everything would workout okay. Unfortunately, it didn’t.
I guess I haven’t said anything because I’m a little hesitant. The sitter and their guests have run of my house. Yes, I should’ve said something after the first guests left.
Understandable. These sitters are outrageous, IMO, for not only inviting children but also overnight guests twice without your agreement. And they probably are doing it, knowing that you’re in a fix while they’re already there and knowing how hard it is to get replacement sitters on the fly.
Even if they’re not doing it in a calculated way, they’re terrible guests of any sort, whether sitting or not. No one with manners invites people to visit or stay at someone else’s home without agreement. It’s not just while sitting for THS that that would be taking advantage and rude. And I say that as a sitter.
I suggest that you rate them accordingly and warn off other hosts. And you might want to start a dispute against them with THS after you return home.
So are you saying, not to give them a heads up?
@RMRL I think that is what @meow was saying. It could result in them giving you an unfair bad review because they are expecting a less than positive review from you.
You seem like a very reasonable and generous person, and you have already allowed these sitters to host Christmas at your home, when this was not the original plan. In return they have invited children when you asked them not to, and had overnight guests on 2 separate occasions.
I’m a sitter. I would never invite anyone into a hosts home without asking their permission. Permission to visit during the day is entirely different to permission to stay the night.
I think you can write a review in the calm, considered manner you have demonstrated through this thread. You can explain that the sitters asked, and were given permission to host Christmas at your home due to a plumbing emergency at a relatives home on condition that only adults attended. You subsequently became aware that children had been present. You can also say that they had overnight guests on 2 separate occasions, which had not been discussed.
Definitely say all the positive things you have noted about them too. You are able to rate them in different categories, so you coukd give 5 stars for pet care if they havr earned it, but perhaps drop a star for communication and for organisation?
Yes that’s what I was saying. @Debbie has already eloquently explained why with suggestions on how to address things so I won’t bother repeating.
For some incomprehensible reason, communication is a category which only applies to HOs, not sitters. In this case, I think the main shortcomings are in the “reliability” category.
I think @Debbie has very good suggestions for the review and I agree you sound quite reasonable and will write in a factual, unemotional style.
I certainly understand your hesitation. You have valid reasons for concern about the results you may have from this “open communication.”
Extensive surveillance?
I personally have a home system. Not extensive - only entrance areas. I have push notifications. They pop up. I have no in house cameras. But it’s nice to know a package I ordered arrived. Or that there is a large animal lurking near the door.
You don’t sound like a homeowner.
Moderator note: edited post for tone
What do you think?
Here’s a possible review for petsitter. I didn’t mention the ‘no kids’ or the driving on the lawn. She was also not truthful when I reached out during my layover (because I wasn’t sure when she was planning on leaving) and her car was not in the driveway but instead, another random car. She said that her car was being worked on and had to switch cars. In reality, the random car belonged to their guests. (They all went somewhere together). Anyway….with the help of Chat GPT, here’s what it came up with.