We recently had a face time interview to what would have been a sit in a upmarket area in a much visited UK City.
The home owner got in touch very quickly and arranged a video call for the next day.
Quite quickly our accents were mentioned, probably as they didn’t fit in with our now geographic location and the face time call started then to feel like a job interview.
For THS outside the UK it might seem outrageous that accent and class bias still exists. Unfortunately, this form of bias is still evident in the UK, across various professional sectors—from media and finance to law and even apparently on THS!
On paper we would have been perfect sitters 25+ 5* reviews .We fully understand that Home Owners are free to choose whomever they wish,however we felt judgments were being made even as we were on the video call.
As we put put phone down we said we’re not getting that one, (we’re not posh enough). The quick rejection only confirmed our thoughts. I only am only raising the topic as it has happened 3 times ,same city and never with other locations.
Sorry to hear that you felt like that on the call. This makes me think of a recent discussion (here) where some members described what info about their personal backgrounds they share/ask for - one of the points that created some debate was ‘education’.
Whilst antiquated attitudes around class can still linger in the UK, I wonder if there are any thoughts from our community about how we can help break down those invisible barriers?
Or, is it a case of moving on to find the right match?
Judgements based on a range of physical/aural/presentation factors aren’t ‘antiquated’ they’re real and EVERYONE does this, it’s wired in biologically, despite the modern politics suggesting that we should all deny this, or that any of it matters. Of course it matters. It’s how we choose partners/friends/employees/clients….it’s the personal in interpersonal interactions. Of course we don’t like it if it excludes us, but it’s normal. It’s taken me decades to learn this… I used to be resentful that Class in England was such a big deal that frequently in certain contexts it meant that I was excluded. I’m older now and see personal judgements as part of how society operates.
Seems like the likeliest time when someone would be making judgments related to bias – they’re usually emotional snap reactions. And they exist in all cultures to some degree.
As an American I find this fascinating. I’m sorry this is happening to you. There are so many reasons why hosts can and do decline candidates which have nothing to do with pet or home care!
I had been in correspondence with a dog owner as co-incidentally I had stayed in her house for a previous owner who had a cat. I couldn’t do her dates but wanted to contact her due to this unique position of knowing her house.
She went on to say that she wished that we were doing the sitting (we were not available) ; she hadn’t had any applications and could we help with her profile.
I spent quite some time suggesting improvements and amendments and soon she had a sitter and thanked us saying hopefully we will meet in the future
Then more dates were listed so I applied. We had a telephone call which was a bit stilted. She finished by saying she would let us know. One minute after the call, she declined our applicaiton without a reason.
I said at the time to Mr Itchyfeet, I bet it is because of our northern accent and they clearly had a “different” lifestyle to us.
Hmmmmm, just thinking aloud, a few loose thoughts, perhaps even a question.
There is a great deal of talk on the forum about matching and partnership. If I, as a sitter, am to partner with someone, I would naturally prefer someone I connect with, recognize, and can communicate with easily, someone who speaks the same language, figuratively and perhaps literally. Fewer misunderstandings, common ground, a shared understanding of expectations.
This must matter even more to hosts, as they are the ones inviting strangers into their homes. So perhaps seeking similarities and compatible qualities is not such a bad idea after all.
This attitude can sting but look on the bright side, by rejectingyou they did you a big favour. If they treated you like that during a simple call imagine how much worse they would have been during the sit. I speak from experience. It’s their loss not yours.
Just another perspective. Would it be possible that they just were interested in your accent or was it clear that they didn’t like it?
I wonder because I am a bit obsessed with everything related to language and I love to try and identify different accents, to check if my guess is correct, I often ask people where they are from or where they picked their accent. Nothing judgmental just pure interest and a friendly conversation is usually established.
@Newpetlover interesting. Very, very surprisingly, when I travel most people think I am from the UK, despite what I see as quite a distinct Australian accent. Because Aussies tend to blend every word together when they talk and sometimes people struggle to understand us, I try to enunciate words slowly and clearly so people can understand me, hence they don’t pickup the Aussie accent. In the US though, it’s immediate and I’m asked to speak ALL the time, just so they can hear me talk and have a laugh at my accent (a kind laugh of course). By the time I go home from the UK though, I arrive home with a British accent!
I see these situations as bullets dodged and as others have said people naturally look for “like” and are more comfortable doing so. As a side note we often get HOs disappointed/confused that we don’t have Aussie accents but like @ziggy we have a tendency to pick up accents from where we are staying even the Italian hand waving
It has been mentioned that it’s just natural and human nature to look for similarities, to judge people based on random characteristics, etc. I think it’s worth mentioning the difference between stereotypes, prejudice and discrimination.
What is really natural for the human brain is stereotyping, we make patterns so it’s easier to organize the information, that process often leads us to prejudice, which implies judging prematurely and often wrongly so we then née to correct that judgment and adjust our cognitive patterns, reorganizing our stereotypes. That is, of course, if we are open minded, as @TheEnglishFlaneur said.
Discrimination is something we should learn to avoid both from a rational and social perspective.
That’s all in general terms. In the case of house sitting everyone is entitled to choose the best matches for them. In my case, I look for diversity, that’s part of the motivation for sitting but, again, I agree with @TheEnglishFlaneur, I look for shared values, too.
In the case of the OP, there’s nothing wrong with declining the application. Re. the accents I just wonder whose perception was more accurate. Were the HO being classists in their attitude and comments about accents or was the sitter’s reaction to this comment what made the HO feel they weren’t a good match? With the information I have I can’t tell because stereotypes and prejudice work in all directions.
Exactly my thoughts. We can’t know what compelled the HOs to go with another sitter; it might have nothing whatsoever to do with accents or snobbery, which might even be more about the sitter’s perceptions or expectations (inverted snobbery also exists, though I’m not suggesting that was the case here).
Trying to ascribe a rationale for someone else’s response is a rather pointless exercise and surely does nobody any good. Better to just hold positive thoughts and move on.
I love accents and being in UK in a tourist spot brings many to me. Yesterday I was helped by a South African and a Welsh couple. I identified where their accents came from. The Welsh couple, from Swansea, laughed when I said my mum was 100% Welsh and I had a relative called Morgan Morgan!
I’m looking for shared values.