How to spot red flags?

Owner Questions, Advice & Chat
41

Well…..all I know is that neither hellocat nor buttercup will EVER be coming to our house. Our home is the biggest investment of our lives, and it’s fabulous. If you don’t do whatsapp chats beforehand, which we don’t always do, but if we did want to do a whatsapp chat beforehand on video, and the potential sitter said they don’t do that, I’d be like, “Bye, Felicia”.

We take great pride in our home. It is sometimes a bit messy if we are in the middle of some project or other, but when we welcome a sitter, to whom we always express great gratitude for taking care of our dog, it is immaculate before they arrive. We leave lots of toilet paper, cleaning supplies, tons of clean towels and sheets, coffee, milk and sugar, free access to whatever dry goods we have in our cabinets, and whatever food we have in the freezer, money for any unexpected expenditures related to the house that might arise, and the list goes on and on. We bend over backwards for the sitters. And here’s the thing, every single time but once, with somebody named xxx, to a person, we have recieved the same in return. Gratitude. It’s an exchange. We all benefit. So, hellocat and buttercup, up your game a little. I should have seen the red flags before xxx arrived. Here’s what she wanted to know if she could have when she got to our house: “Do you have an espresso machine? Do you have a wifi hot spot in your car for my iphone? Do you have a yoga mat (I don’t want to bring mine)? Do you have a juicer?……..” The list went on. And xxx had 19 pages of 5 star reviews!! She was a total nightmare. I can’t even begin to go into the list of “problems” she had with the sit, which she brought to our attention on a daily basis, so I only communicated with her with whatsapp texts during the 6 weeks we were away. I always answered her in a timely manner and addressed every “concern” she had, which included sending us a photo of a glass of water that looked milky because there was air in the lines due to some work on the water lines in our neighborhood. I was the soul of patience with this demanding person who was clearly gaming the system. We ask our sitters to arrive the night before we leave because at the time we had 3 dogs, and we wanted them to meet beforehand because one of our rescues is very fearful and would have been apoplectic if xxx had just come into the house unannounced after we left. We put xxx in the guest room in a king size bed that nobody had ever complained about before, but xxx, on the morning of our departure, told us she was “uncomfortable” in that bed and that THS rules say that the sitter must have comfortyable accomodations. Clearly gaming the system.

When the sit was over, she complained so vociferously about us to THS that they closed our account!!! But…..since I knew she was problematic, I saved all the texts we exchanged, in which she was berating us and complaining about so many things, that I saved them all, and copied and pasted them into an email to THS to let them know the real deal, and they reinstated our account. But xxx is still out there, a professional housesitter, taking advantage of every home owner she can, and leaving our house FILTHY. She would not allow our housekeeper to come in to clean once a week, said she’d do it, but she did not. Just before the sit, our housekeeper and her son, who were both vaccinated against covid, both got mild cases, so, of course I cancelled the housekeeper the first week. But, for a vaccinated person, you don’t shed virus after 5 or 6 days after you get it, so there was no good reason she refused to let the housekeeper come to clean the house for 6 weeks.

So, my advice to home owners is that if a person is a little too demanding, like all the requests xxx had for us, that’s a red flag. SAVE ALL TEXT MESSAGES between yourselves and the sitter. You may need proof later.

(edited to remove names in line with Forum Guidelines)

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42

What’s so bad about the word, “interview”? Both parties are interviewing each other? Drop the semantic complaint. It’s irrelevant. We had an interview once for a sit in Connecticut, and we should have known from that interview that that was not the sit for us. Very fussy fussy couple. They mentioned that the driveway might get a tiny bit icy because of some very bad engineering done during construction. The driveway became a frozen river which my 74 year old husband had to throw ice melting crystals on every day, twice a day, and we had to buy more during our stay because we ran out. They had to have known how bad the driveway was. We were never reimbursed for that expense. They said that a furniture delivery was coming, but they didn’t tell us that the delivery truck would just dump it in the slippery driveway. They also didn’t mention how heavy it was, but merely expected us to take care of it for them. My poor husband had to get two giant super heavy boxes from the driveway into the garage, slip-slidig away the whole distance. They also said that a “neighbor” would be keeping an eye out on the property. The thing is that there was no neighbor’s house anywhere in sight. The real deal was that they had a ring camera, and didn’t tell us about it. This is against THS policy. They also never mentioned that we were not allowed to let anyone in the house. It was Christmas time, and the pastor of our church and his two daughters and their husbands dropped by. The second they walked in the door, we got a phone call because the 2 guys who owned the house were watching us. I explained who our guests were, and they insisted that we ask them to leave immediately, which we did. How embarrassing was that? So be careful on a phone interview, too. If the hosts are demanding and not open hearted, turn it down. In retrospect, we would have if we’d have known what was in store.

(Edited to be in lines with Forum Guidelines)

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43

I am not particularly bothered by the word itself, as @Silversitters mention, it’s used by THS but when you see “job”, “hire” and “interviewee” in the same paragraph, then you can get the idea that it’s not about a mutual exchange.

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44

Too long to read. Bye Felicia :rofl:

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45

@hellocat Red flag…more like a full parade :sweat_smile:

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46

It’s not my complaint - I am just informing the OP why they are getting pushback on the forum, as they misinterpreted the source.

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47

Interested in what you would call the discussion(s), conversation(s) , etc. between HO’s and potential sitters then ?

Semantics is so subjective.

48

@toreishi I believe you’ve answered your own question..it’s nothing more than a chat and conversation.

By contrast, ‘interview’ generally implies a journalist or prospective employer, and even in genuine recruitment many consider the term outdated. I never use such phrases when aiming to engage highly sought-after candidates for serious roles.

It may be a clash of generations, but language matters in every setting

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49

The word “interview” can imply a power imbalance, which is why it bothers some folks. To me, that’s not necessarily so, but I usually call it a “chat.”

It’s sort of like dating — you’re not “interviewing” your date, but certainly both sides are learning about each other during conversations / questions and are deciding whether there’s a fit.

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50

Gosh this is quite aggressive… I think maybe @buttercup was making a joke?

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51

I think I’d see it more of an opportunity for potential. Sitters & the HO to get to know each other

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52

Much as I loath video calls I do still do them if requested.

Here is a good example of how to word an invite for a video chat. (And avoid it sounding like an interview).

“This seems like a great match! Do you have time for a quick video chat this evening? We’re available any time after 1800”

And for once it wasn’t a case of, “we have other people to talk to”, it was a case of wanting to talk to the sitter who was the most likely to fit. The sit was agreed halfway through the call. Official invite sent within 30 seconds, I accepted immediately, and the welcome guide was sent before I had time to catch my breath.

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53

Guess you can’t make everyone happy…it’s like teaching a cat to fetch. Just don’t :laughing:

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54

From a Sitter, thanks for mentioning this, on multiple levels.

I know some sitters have a great deal of experience & loads of 5-star reviews, & can’t (or aren’t willing) to be a backup option. Although I have all 5-star reviews, I’m a bit newer — so I accept I might not always be a HO’s 1st choice wrt a “competitive” sit. That said, I happen to have a very flexible schedule, & I’m choosy about picking the listings I apply for. I don’t have to take any sit, and I’m patient & understanding about how these things work. So if you treat my application with similar respect to the care I invested in it & then later find yourself in need of a last-minute sitter for some reason, you’re very likely to find me willing to drop what I’m doing to help out — and I’ve never had anyone be sorry they had me for their sit. :blush:

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55

I’m a Sitter but also a home- and pet-owner.

I just want to say I’m sorry you had such a bad experience with your sit, and also sorry that the thread became so contentious when you just came here for some advice for how to ensure a better experience the next time. It wasn’t your fault. There is just a sensitivity about some HOs treating Sitters like employees (or worse) — but it’s unfortunate people got caught up in the semantics of things, as it really didn’t seem pertinent at all to your situation or the question. :confused:

I don’t have a lot to add to those constructive suggestions & comments you did receive, but I would echo the point that when you get stuck at the last minute, you have a lot fewer choices/tools to spot or account for red flags. The one piece of advice I would put forth, is to try to build up a small network of backup options in the case of those last-minute cancellations, which do sometimes happen. Maybe that means finding a couple reliable & local someone(s) on a paid service such as Rover or the like.

I realize that might be an unexpected cost, but when the security of your home & pets are the priority, I expect we’d all agree it’s better than the alternative you experienced in this case. Taking on an unknown, unpaid ‘someone’ last-minute, when desperate, is always going to be a higher risk. It might be fine - but only you can judge your willingness to roll those dice.

Best wishes, and :crossed_fingers: you don’t have deal with a similar situation again.

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56

Ach, this makes me feel sentimental for the days when “books” were a thing!

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