Hi All!
I’m very stressed because I was chatting with two potential sitters and now have a difficult conflict. I had a phone conversation with both, and sitter (we’ll say Pat) had asked to come in two days after the start of the sit. The other sitter (let’s say Charlie) was bale to sit the whole time. Yesterday, Pat said they would let me know by the end of the day if they could come or not, so I asked to Charlie to let me know also. I did not hear from Pat before going to bed, so I confirmed with Charlie (who is also a better fit for our dates).
I confirmed Charlie in the app and wrote a message in the app to Pat to thank them for all the time we had spent texting and to let them know we went with someone else. Charlie accepted the sit on their end.
This morning, Pat texted me to say they had bought their plane tickets and were looking forward to the sit!
I feel so bad that they bought their ticket before confirming with me. I know Charlie hasn’t bought a ticket (nor will they need to, they’re within driving distance). I would love any advice you have about how to handle this situation.
Pat sounds highly disorganized.
Tell her sorry for her misunderstanding, but you had not confirmed the sit.
You don’t owe this sitter any other explanation beyond that.
I’d stick with the sitter you confirmed. Tough luck to the other, who bought tickets without confirming. And I say this as a sitter.
Pat definitely jumped the gun and you have nothing to reproach yourself for. I speak as a sitter.
I find that clear communication is an essential component when caring for someone’s home and pets. I would be concerned that Pat is making decisions based on their preference rather than on your communication with them and may continue to make spontaneous decisions without considering your input.
No sitter should ever outlay money on a sit until they are confirmed through THS. You are not obligated to Pat and don’t have to do anything. You are however obligated to Charlie and can’t cancel their confirmed sit just because Pat made a mistake. Unfortunately for Pat, they might have learned an expensive lesson here.
Buying tickets before the sit was confirmed was not a good idea on her end.
One thing I would ask though is at the time you connected with Pat had you already been planning on connecting with the other sitter too or did this person apply after you had already talked with her?
If there was no mention of you talking with multiple applicants–whether you simply didn’t mention it ,or at the time you talked she was the only person you were considering–she may have assumed that she was the only one in the running and it was just a matter of letting you know for sure if she was in or not.
But even in this scenario, it wouldn’t be prudent to book flights without official confirmation, and she should have given you her answer by the time she said she would.
Pat has been presumptuous and an unreliable communicator.
Pat had asked to come in two days after the start of the sit.
Pat said they would let me know by the end of the day if they could come or not, .. I did not hear from Pat
This morning,“Pat texted me to say they had bought their plane tickets
Charlie can arrive on the start date and has been prompt in communicating with you .
I don’t see this as a difficult decision to make .
At minimum, Pat should be already seeing that she didn’t get the sit on the THS site and/or app as soon as Charlie hit ‘accept’. And if her notifications are on, she already got the ‘sorry you weren’t chosen this time’ email from THS. Seems hinky
This is a difficult situation.
In the US, most airline tickets are refundable “within the first 24 hours after booking.” This is a regulation/law of the US Department of Transportation.
Pat might be deliberately trying to pull a fast one. Why didn’t he/she see the communication that you sent the night before?
I agree that sitters should not make any travel arrangements before confirming a sit on the THS site.
In the future, if you are considering more than one applicant, it would be prudent to be very clear about it so that no assumptions are made. I can see how Pat may have believed that he/she was being offered the sit as long as he/she could arrive on the first day.
Many thanks to everyone! I told both sitters multiple times that I was considering two people. However, it’s always so helpful to hear from folks with more experience than me. I agree that Charlie has the right to the sit. It’s helpful to hear about the ways you think Pat’s communication has been potentially telling, although I don’t want to draw too many conclusions/make assumptions. I hope this doesn’t happen with anyone else, but in case it does, I hope this thread is helpful.
Even if Pat has booked non flexible flights there is a 24 hour refund policy on all airlines/travel sites so if they’re quick, then that solves it all and Charlie is good to go. #fastestfingerfirst
That you were clear you were talking with other people besides her makes it particularly odd that she would do that.
Hopefully she bought refundable tickets or used an airline that offers full refunds of any ticket type for up to 24 hours prior-- if the purchase was still in that time window by time she found out she wasn’t doing the sit. I know all US based airlines must do this; international airlines must as well if any part of the flight is to or from the US. Not sure about the policies of any other countries.
But even if you hadn’t informed her she wasn’t the only applicant under consideration, a sit truly isn’t in the books until the invite has officially been offered by the host and confirmed by the sitter. Then and only then would I book any transportation.
People can buy what tickets they want to, and some sitters would decide to travel to a location and if they get a petsit it is a bonus, but they’re going anyway. So in itself it is no problem and no business of anyone else.
Relying on getting a sit that is not confirmed is another matter, and risky for a host or a sitter. Be sure to have a plan B. Which we all should have anyway.
So go with your confirmed sitter which sounds a better match for this sit.
You sound like a reasonable caring person and it is unfortunate that your candidate jumped before confirming. Life is more of a learning opportunity for some than others.You are blameless here and are not obligated actually or karmicly IMO. Who knows perhaps they use the ticket and find the love of their life because of this. I am petsitting now because of something dumb I did four years ago and I love my new life!
My question. Pat asked you if she could come two days after the sit was to start. What was your response? Did you say no I need someone who can start on our start date? If that happened wouldn’t she then send you an email that she can and let you know. Did that happen? Also I’m wondering if she said she bought plane tickets to get insurance money from THS. I only have basic coverage but with premium can she try to collect saying you canceled? Sounds fishy to me.
It wasn’t your fault since pat said they would message you first to let you know if they could or not. You ended up confirming someone else and nothing was ever confirmed between you and pat. You did nothing wrong if anything i wouldn’t have gotten tickets if we didn’t confirm. That’s kind of odd to do in my opinion
Glad to hear Charlie accepted the sit
I think that would need to be a confirmed sit. Can’t imagine that THS would pay out, given the terms are so strict otherwise. I think they would also need to try to get another sit, and pay 150 out of pocket themselves. So hard work to get anything.