Struggling with a review

Dear community,

I haven’t used THS very often, although I have been a member for several years now. Our latest sit finished just about three days ago, and while being overseas, we had fairly good communication with the sitter. Prior to them staying at our place we had a Zoom call, and they visited our house twice before we left.
While they did a fairly good job taking care of the cats, upon our return, we found out that they had left the house very messy, the cat’s water bowls looked as they were not washed at all, and the cats’ food plates with dried wet food filled with dry food on top. The kitty litter was all over the bathroom floor, indicating that it hadn’t been cleaned and the bins were overflowing (we were away for three weeks, and they could’ve taken the bins out at least three times in that period). The worst part was that my outdoor plants were parched by the sun, and some of them were beyond recovery. I explained to the sitter several times how often the plants would need watering and reminded them while we were away. It was pretty heartbreaking coming home to something so devastating, and I’m honestly struggling to understand what went wrong. I had a chat with the THS, and they suggested speaking with the sitter, but that makes zero sense to me. I was just wondering what other people’s experiences are and what you would recommend. I’m expecting they will retaliate if I leave a negative review, and I’m worried because they obviously know where I live.
Thank you in advance for all your advice.

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With the ‘new’ review system that came into place last year, there is no longer a risk of retaliation. They will only be able to see your feedback once they published theirs. So you don’t have to worry about that.

Just be honest. Mention that they took good care of the cats, but unfortunately you were disappointed with the level of cleanliness and the plant care.
Be objective, state the facts and don’t attack on a personal level. (E.g ‘My kitchen wasn’t very clean’ iso ‘the sitters have a lack of hygiene’)
I wouldn’t worry about them knowing where you live. It’s highly unlikely they’ll go to the trouble of coming back.

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So sorry you had to have this experience.

The review-system is blind so the sitter won’t see your review before they have submitted theirs or the 14 day period is up.

Please write an honest and factual review. It will help the sitter to improve, help other hosts and help the community of THS. The best is an honest reflection of the sit, with pros and cons. It could for instance be something like

«Communication with the sitter was good, with a Zoom call and two house visits before we left.

While the cats seemed to be well cared for, we returned to a messy house (water bowls and food plates, kitty litter scattered in the bathroom, full bins). The outdoor plants were unfortunately parched despite clear watering instructions.

I appreciate the sitter’s efforts with the cats, the state of the house and plants was unfortunately not as expected».

Docking a star on overall sit would be expected.

After you have left reviews or 14-day period is out, you will both be able to give one answer to the review of the other party. If an answer is given it is best to keep it factual as it could otherwise backfire.

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The possibility of retaliation will likely come into play if you take the advice of THS and discuss the issues with the sitter, thereby alerting them that you’ll be leaving a review that is less than 5*. As you say, this doesn’t make sense. It can’t solve anything and could put you in a more vulnerable position in terms of the review process. I’m sure you’ve been emotional, coming back to such a mess, but want to reassure you that it is highly improbable the sitters will return to your address if you were to leave a less-than-complimentary review.

I would do as @Garfield and @Els suggested and leave an honest review of your experience.

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Are they local? Maybe I am missing something, I don’t understand why you’d worry because they know where you live.

Sorry to hear this, very disappointing. Please leave an honest review. By doing so it can help people learn that their standards of living need improving. (But so annoying to come home to such a mess). Onwards and upwards, may your next sitters be amazing. :cowboy_hat_face:

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If they had visited twice (!) before the sit, I guess they would be very local.

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Please be honest, but maybe take time in how you word it.
It could be that these are really good caring people but no idea or the same standard of cleanliness. They could also just not care but we dont know.
If you got a good feeling with them & pets looked after then this is positive. Mention the negatives too, the sitters themselves need to know and may not be aware. Really it is helpful for them to know.
If they take it badly, that cant be helped but by keeping the review overall positive towards them as people is the best you can do.

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This is shocking. Try to write and objective review, please.
Leaving the house messy and not watering plants… when they had 3 weeks, and should have held up their side of the bargain…
I do understand it is a hard thing to write such a review.
I had 2 sitters, who were both neat & clean and did not neglect anything.

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As others have said review system is blind. My concern as a host is that if they were that careless about the plants, the litter box and not washing bowls and dishes – all of which were discussed and I imagine noted in a home guide in writing – then I also wouldn’t trust them to care for my pets who are older and healthy but require special diets making things a little more complex than average. So as a host, I ask you to please be honest about their shortcomings and give them less than a five star review. I don’t care how many or how few stars they get. I want the details you gave here.

With the blind review system the worst thing they can do is respond under your review, and if they respond dramatically that will reflect more on them then on you.

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Thank you everyone for your thoughtful and heartfelt responses. I truly appreciate your support. I’ll think about it a bit more, and will make a decision soon.

I was wondering if anyone would have any advice on how to act for the upcoming sits. Should I ask the sitters to send the photos of plants as often as photos of cats? How often should I remind them about the watering regime? And would you have someone else come to take care of the plants? Do you do a video call with the sitters while you are away?
I’m just trying to understand what else I could do to prevent this from happening again.

Thank you again.

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Hi @Peonie19

Yes, the sitter lives in the same city as us, although in a different suburb. I’m trying not to make any emotional decisions and exclude local applicants, but after this experience, I’m wondering if it’s better to have sitters from abroad/different city. What are your experiences?

What makes people trustworthy is not where they live.

How did you do your assessment prior to the sit?

The usual thing would be to

Read application
Read listing of sitter
Read sitters reviews
Read «reverse reviews»; on each of the sitters reviews, you can press the profile of the reviewer and find the review that the sitter left each host
Do a video-call with sitter, following up questions and get to know each other

Before selecting the sitter (or host).

I would think there should be signs if a sitter had done this before. And these things often form a pattern, it doesn’t come out of the blue. Providing members give honest and factual reviews.

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As a sitter, I would consider it slightly untrusting if a home owner were to ask for pictures of the plants or provide reminders of the watering regime. Good sitters do not require any of these things and can be trusted to do what has been asked of them without micro-management. Unfortunately, you have not had good sitters on this occasion, which is naturally impacting your view of how you should approach future sits.

As @Garfield mentioned, the trustworthiness of a sitter has nothing to do with where they are located, it is down to the individual themselves. Unfortunately, there are individuals on this site (both sitters and home owners) who muddy the waters and make the experience somewhat less pleasant and smooth sailing. Rest assured, this is relatively rare (i.e. in over 30 sits, I have had two bad experiences). I would encourage you to use your discernment in choosing future sitters, reading their reviews and having pre-sit interactions. Perhaps highlight to them the importance of your plants being watered and that the previous sitter neglected this. Hopefully any future sitters you have will restore your faith in this process.

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You mention that they did a ‘fairly good job of looking after the cats’ - yet their food and water bowls were grubby and the litter tray area was a mess. Not sure that shows any kind of care!

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Never ask to video chat mid-sit, we’ve never been asked in 30+ sits, the sitter may feel like you don’t trust them to care for your place, plus they need to be able to relax, without clock watching taking up the day for whenever you said to video chat, and it popping into their heads on the days prior too, as a thing on their to-do list, so please don’t. Also don’t ask for pics of the plants, because you’ll come across as picky, because sometimes plants suffer, that’s life, also they could be over-watered and suffer just as much if you make too much of a deal of it.

So with the plants, put it in your welcome guide, but also in your case, I would simply pop a message as a response to a cat pic, to say, I know it’s been hot, how are the plants holding up? So it jogs their mind, or perhaps something like, I can’t remember if I told you where the watering can is for the plants bla bla bla. We had someone have a calendar hanging up with simply the bin days on it, perhaps you could do something like that but with the plant watering days too, or put a calendar print on on the table.

Local sitters - please don’t disregard future local sitters, we sit full time but return to our home town on a regular basis, and so we sit the same pets time and time again, some HO’s book their holidays around when we are free, because they can go away without any worry at all, unlike an unfamiliar sitter whereby you need to think about making sure everything is perfect and if you’ve worded your instructions correctly, worrying about will the sitter enjoy your home, will they enjoy your location etc etc, with a local sitter who may return, they already know your place/location, so you can switch off more before your holiday and get excited about your holiday. Don’t let one not-so-great sitter, tarnish your view of future sitters.

Don’t worry about them being local, THS has a copy of their ID, so they’re not likely to do anything, in fact I have never heard of a sitter returning in retaliation to a place.

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Great sitters don’t need reminders, just a good welcome guide. Going forward, select sitters with great reviews or ask detailed questions. We clean water and food bowls daily during our sits but that’s because that’s my level of cleanliness.

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Sorry to read about all this. Not normal sitter behaviour for sure.

It might be good to check their experience with plants. If they don’t know much about plants, it might help to give detailed instructions how often to water them. Asking for photos of the plants might be a good idea, as it will automatically direct the attention of the sitters to your plants.

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Ooops, looks like I skipped that line :sweat_smile:

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I don’t think I’d ask for photos of plants. To me that sounds a little too reminderish. But I might have some kind of calendar chart on the fridge – a big one – with garbage days and plants waterings. I’d also have a copy and you could always reply to check in texts and posts with a friendly message like: “Thanks for the cat photo :-). How are my plants doing? I miss them too!”

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