We’ve been active THS sitters since 2022 with a great track record and many returns to favorites and regulars, but recently had a challenging experience that’s left us shaken—and unsure how to proceed.
The sit involved:
A home that turned out to be a public- business (winery) four days a week—not disclosed in the listing. We are expected to vacate kitchen/dining/living space from 10-5
Significant loss of privacy*, and this house being in “a party place” with constant rotation of strangers (while we always ask for quiet places to write, since my husband is a writer)
The homeowner” returning during the sit” creating confusion about why we were even needed??
Several inappropriate, boundary-crossing and plain disturbing behaviors that left us deeply uncomfortable and trapped and utterly distressed during the entire stay
A scheduling discrepancy* where we were pressured to stay later than agreed, and made feel bad that we couldn’t go another day
We later learned from a neighbor that other sitters had similar experiences but didn’t leave reviews, out of fear of retaliation.
We’ve always handled our sits with care and professionalism and adore the animals we look after, but this one crossed a line emotionally and logistically.
We’re reaching out to ask:
How do you handle review retaliation risks*?
Has anyone else had to report a host or ask THS for support?
Should we leave a factual review or raise it privately with THS support team?
We’d love to hear any advice from the community. We don’t want to harm anyone—but we do feel future sitters should be protected from similar surprise.
This is our first such negative experience in 2.5 years of active use of THS
It is very toxic but it seems that usually the hosts are the ones who get most protection, but as it happens sometimes it gets dangerous for the sitters
Thanks for reading,
Hope to hear your thoughts and advice
– A & N
Firstly the listing should never have been allowed, and it’s extremely disappointing to hear that you’re not the first sitters to have this experience. You must report the owners to THS as a ‘Member Dispute’ and keep any photos, WhatsApp messages that will back up what you’ve been experiencing. Here’s how to do that:
The owners must be removed from THS never to return!
You definitely MUST leave a review and you should know by now that you don’t risk a retaliatory review as the review system is ‘blind’. You both have 14 days to post a review and if you both have within that time you can read them. If only one of you has then the other cannot post a review although can comment.
How much longer have you there? You should, if you wish, give the owners 24 hrs notice that you are leaving as their sit is against so many of the policies.
I agree with what @Smiley has said raise a “member dispute” - a listing where third parties are present ( and this was not previously disclosed ) should be removed from the platform as it is against the terms of service .
You can start the process by contacting the Urgent Support 24/7 Phone Number.
Definitely leave a factual review- why wouldn’t you ?
Maybe just assume you’ll get no review, or a bad review. Accept it. It may not happen, but be prepared. And then it leaves your mind open to be honest in your review. Polite, factual and honest. Keep emotion out. But please warn others.
Maybe it was back in the day when you didn’t get to read them simultaneously? Of course one has the right of reply but it isn’t a path many wish to tread…
People prefer to cut their losses.
Neighbours are sometimes much nicer and more empathetic than the Home Owners.. maybe over a cup of tea they shared their concerns? I had a heart to heart with the regular dog walker and learnt a great deal about the dog’s needs and odd behaviour while out with the “pack”.
One lovely neighbour I got on so well with said “ There’s always a spare bed here if you’re in the area! “ How lovely is that?
She was often left “holding the baby” as the Home Owner was a keen tennis player and golfer and the dog had separation anxiety!
She made sure the Home Owner wrote a lovely review for me, after all I borrowed her Hoover as his was rubbish lol
I can see that you’ve reached out to Membership Services, so I’ve passed over the ticket number to the team, and let them know about your experience and this listing.
@Itchyfeet of course you are correct, but if the sitter raised some concerns during the sit, then I can imagine the home owner writing a retaliatory review in anticipation of a poor review. Or no review at all, because they sound like they don’t really care that much about sitters. So I said to assume no/poor review, to get that block out of the sitters head, so that they can go ahead and leave an honest review - kind of so that they are not marred by anticipatory ‘what ifs’. If that makes sense.
Probably one other sitter got friendly with them and vented to them as the OP did to learn this. I’ve had neighbors invite me over for a glass of wine and conversation and even for dinner.
You already know it’s not allowed, they’re totally in the wrong., but I can see you’ve only just joined the forum, so just incase you don’t know this, if they happen to leave you a negative review, make sure you stay factual in your response to the true situation, they’ve breached the rules in numerous way, but stay respectable towards them, don’t get personal and don’t let your emotions get involved, because other owners may potentially read it, and they’ll see straight away that it’s the owners that are totally in the wrong, so write it with future owners in mind, stick to the facts, facts, facts.
I am so sorry this has happened to you. It isn’t your fault.
Clearly you feel threatened by these owners and it seems that you are worried not only about a bad review, but perhaps some other form of retaliation. Your own safety and well being are paramount.
Assuming things progress to the point where you are leaving a review, I recommend you write out the whole thing - the whole thing! - and then ask ChatGPT to summarize it for you, removing all of the emotion and leaving only the facts. Then post only the facts as the review.
The writing of the whole thing will be cathartic and posting only the facts will serve you well for future sits. I truly wish you well.
Sometimes sitters don’t leave a review as they truly believe that the host will get booted from the platform, so why bother?
Honestly, despite what the host has done, they probably will NOT get booted from the platform. They will probably just get a warning, or they will lie about the situation, and THS might fail to pursue the truth.
Maybe they already have 2-3 more sitters lined up for the busy summer wine tasting season? At least future sitters will have a chance of seeing your honest review and stay out of harm’s way.
I just saw this on the Member Dispute page: “As long as reviews remain respectful and the house sit has not breached our terms of service, a member has the right to leave their opinions and comments.”
Hasn’t the homeowner breached the terms of service? Presumably then they shouldn’t be permitted to leave a review?
The sitter did NOT breach the terms, so she should be able to leave a review.
Yes, I completely agree, HappyDeb! It’s been 7 months since I was blindsided by the worst sit of sits and I’m still seething over the impossibility positive 5 star reviews left by the prior and subsequent sitters! Even in the dog park the other neighbors told me the dogs were reactive and not nice, yet all the reviews say how adorable, etc the yorkies were. No one mentioned the lack of potty training or the lack of heat or the lack of a place to sit and read, etc etc etc….anyways, what I’m trying to say is, please leave a fair review!
Recently, left a review which explained the pet couldn’t be left and it gave me a stomachache cuz the owners were wonderful and kind…yet the description wasn’t accurately portrayed. And those HOs gave me the best review I’ve had! Still, they contacted me last week to tell me the dog had passed, and again thanked me for my caring. So it wasn’t taken of context, the HOs ununderstood and the “negative” comment wasn’t a criticism as much as a clarification. So be factual, explain what was happening and don’t be worried bout them giving you a bad review!
Thank you so much Jenny,
this experience is highly unusual for us ,
And while not disclosing any details of the creepiness, I am at the point of wanting to quit THS so we never have to go through this again (even though all previous experiences were stellar and wonderful) … Hopefully this will get resolved somehow
