Cleanliness and bad experience with sitter

Hi everyone, I would like to hear your opinion on my last sit and the reviews we left each other.

Whenever I leave my house with a sitter, I make sure it’s perfectly clean, organized and ready to receive them.

For this last sit, met before I left, I explained them where things were, including cleaning supplies, vacuum cleaner, etc. In reality, when they arrived I was putting the vacuum cleaner away, and took the opportunity to show them where it was and how to use it, but they didn’t seem interested.

For the first time ever, my cat hid away from the sitters when they first arrived. She is always really sociable, and many sitters have said that themselves.

The communication was fine while we were away, although she would not always reply promptly.

But when I returned home, I was shocked to see my house so dirty. The house had not been vacuumed and there were crumbs, cat hair and all sort of dirt pushed to the sides. There were multiple plastic bags of different shapes and sizes around the house, food remaining on the floor, their hair everywhere, sheets had been washed but left in the machine for hours (so I had to rewash them because they smelled bad), literally all the dishes were dirty and had food stuck on them and were greasy. I ask my sitters to make the bed with clean sheets before I arrive, but tell them they don’t need to wash the new ones.

All of these instructions were given during the interview, in the welcome guide and in person. They agreed to doing them. And I always reinforce how important keeping the house clean is to me.

Not only the house was filthy, and I had to spent about four hours cleaning when I got home (which is the last thing I want to do when returning from a long trip), but my cat was not acting like herself. She seemed lethargic and was hiding. That has never happened when I come home, she is always at the door to greet me, even back from a long trip.

They asked if they should change the litter completely during our primary video call, I said yes, added the info in the guide, and reminded them in person. They didn’t.

The water bowl was also dirty. It clearly hadn’t been changed in some days.

My cat’s toys were all in a corner, in a place she couldn’t even play with them. They’re always around the house. I saw from the pictures they sent me that they were left in the corner the whole time.

I left an honest review, 2 stars, which I would have appreciated when screening her. She left me a 5 star review, but her reply to my review was full of lies. She said I didn’t have any cleaning supplies, that I had no broom, no pan and vacuum, which is crazy to think, because I showed her in person. I absolutely had all the cleaning supplies. Perhaps the only thing I didn’t have enough for the whole length of their stay was toilet paper, and it’s true the dish-soap was running low, but should have been enough for the amount of time they stayed. They didn’t even used the dishsoap, apparently.

She said my house was unnaturally hot, even though I told her during our interview that my house does get hot, which she said would not be a problem because they come from a hot place.

They left the wrong keys in the safe box, which would have been a problem had one of the doors been locked by my neighbor, which happens.

She accused me of lying in my review, when I simply stated facts about the state my house was left and how my cat was.

Am I in the wrong here? I’m upset about the answer she left to my review and worried about how that might affect my experiences with future sitters.

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Welcome to the forum @FloraMoon !

I’m sure you will get good insights here, but let me first say that I’m very sorry for the bad experience you had. That sounds very unusual and bad. Was this a new sitter or did she have reviews?

My impression is that a bad experience does not need to be a hindrance to future great sits. You have unfortunately learnt something and both sitters and HOs know that a bad sit can happen. Whether it is just «a bad match» or worse. A review that is unemotional and based on facts is not a red flag for most, but if one is worried one can also say that «one would like to answer any question you might have».

I for one «read between the lines» and see the whole package - profile, reviews given and received.

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I am sorry to hear about your bad experience with the sitter and the issue with the review. Having the house be in bad condition is upsetting enough but to also think your beloved pet wasn’t being cared for properly is even more so.

As a sitter, if I saw a positive review for the host, but then all this negative feedback in response to a less than favorable review by the host, I would take what they have said with a huge grain of salt, especially if it is one of those cringe-inducing long, rambling responses most of them tend to be.

Your post here comes across as reasonable, honest and measured, and I know it must be upsetting to see her saying things that aren’t true. You stated your review was just a simple stating of facts and that as well will work in your favor.

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The whole experience sounds like a nightmare! Sorry this happened to you.

I hope your sweet kitty recovered nicely. Ugh. I would be seething at the thought that the Sitter did not take good care of my pet.

She gave you 5 stars! Well done! Then she responded to your review and told lies. Not cool, but people who look at the whole picture will see what happened. I would not worry about it too much.

Thank you for having all of the cleaning supplies, broom, dustpan, and vacuum readily available for Sitters! It is really helpful if all of this is spelled out in writing, in the Welcome Guide. Sitter cannot use “lack of clarity” as an excuse.

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House a mess, not following rules, lies…Here’s my bottom line : The fact that your poor kitty was displaying abnormal behaviour both during the intial meeting (ESP kitty !?!) and after your return says EVERYTHING.
I’m so sorry you and your cat had to go through this horrible experience and I hope that she’s back to her lovely normal self.
I can’t speak for all sitters but I can generally “read” a crappy review and consider it amongst all other good reviews. In other words, I take a poor review in the context of others + the general vibe that I get from the HO’s post, needs, etc. One bad review never affects my choices - especially when I know that, sadly, there are some irresponsible, immature and self-involved sitters around.

And, thank you for being honest in your review of her. This helps everyone - sitters and HO’s alike. Too many are either fearful or otherwise intimidated about possible repercussions of honesty.

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Thank you @Garfield for your kind words and reassurance. She wasn’t a new sitter, and had plenty of 5 star reviews, about 15 reviews/references. She had one 5 star review with 3 or 4 stars in each of the broke down items, where the person mentioned the counter tops had not been wiped down and house wasn’t so clean. There was another 2 star review where the person said she left early because of an emergency and the house was left filthy, but they said she apologized profusely and recognized it wasn’t how it should have been (which she didn’t do with me at all). In her reply, she said it was because of a personal emergency she had and people could contact her for more information. I thought it seemed valid and because of all the other 5 star reviews, it was maybe worth the shot. Lesson learned on my side!

I messaged her after her reply showing the pictures I took of the house, including the items that clearly had been used, but that she accused me of not having. She replied so offensively, said that “miserable people leave miserable comments” and that I’m pathetic, that I’m empty as a human being, she made up lies about how my cat could have died because of the heat (there was indeed a heat wave, but she never mentioned any issues during the stay, and clearly didn’t change my cats water, which is the worst she could do in a heat wave). I have been through hotter heat waves with my cat in this house and we managed fine, my cat never showed signs of distress. She said she will report my profile, I did write THS already to raise a complaint, but nothing came out of it yet.

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Thank you @KC1102 for your words, that’s reassuring. There were things that I found out after I left my review (for example, the litter not being changed), so it’s a shame I didn’t add that piece of info. I tried to be as polite as I could, I mentioned the communication was good and that she sent updates daily, and then listing some of the things that were not right, including cleanliness and my cat’s demeanor when I got home. I did say at the end that it seemed to me that the house was treated like a hotel or airbnb, and I think this might have been what set the untruthful reply with accusations that were incorrect. I realize now that omitting this part could have given me a better chance of getting a not so bad reply, but I felt so disrespected and taken advantage of that that was the best I could come up with. It looked to me like she didn’t understand the purpose of the platform and used my house to visit the city for free, without taking their responsibilities seriously. Maybe I could have come up with more nice things to say to soften the blow, but honestly I didn’t have many… the house was so dirty and my cat wasn’t like herself. I definitely learned some lessons from this sit. Thanks again for your kind reply.

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Thank you @PVGemini, that’s reassuring. I have a thorough welcome guide where I explain exactly where each cleaning supply is, and what to use them for. I guess she didn’t read it. Funny thing is, in one of the pictures she sent me during the sit, you can see the mop right behind her!

My fur baby recovered alright, some 8h after I got back she had her usual zoomies and was up for a cuddle session as usual :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

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Thank you @toreishi , all of these replies are really reassuring to me. I feel like I’ve been to multiple phases of stress and anger, and then I start to doubt myself, but my partner, who is not as worried about a clean house as I am, confirms that the house was indeed left in an unacceptable state of cleanliness.

I have never left such a bad review, but I think it’s crucial to be honest to warn HOs, but I guess it’s a risk I need to be willing to take if I leave an honest review. Hopefully it never happens again, but if it does, I guess I’ll need to focus more on the good things to soften the blow.

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You are not in the wrong and thank you for leaving an honest review. The fact that she left you a good review and only started getting nasty when she saw your review of her will be obvious to future sitters. As a homeowner and sitter, I always investigate prior HOs and their sitters and read both sides of the story. She sounds vindictive and is someone I would never choose for my cat.

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You are absolutely not in the wrong, and well done for leaving an honest review. She sounds like a total nightmare. I think that most sitters will be able to see that you are the good person here.

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What a terrible experience you have just been through with this sitter @FloraMoon. I’m so pleased to read your beautiful cat is back to behaving normally and lovingly.

You did the right thing in being honest in your review about how your home and cat had been treated by this sitter. Her retaliatory reply will do her far more harm as it appears on her profile, not yours. Future sitters applying to your listing will see her 5* of you and only if they decide to read your reviews of past sitters will they see the review you gave her and her response. They will see that this does not match her comments in the review she gave you.

Do not engage in any further communication with this person.

Do let us know whether THS is supportive in your complaint raised with them.

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Hi, welcome to the forum.
I am a sitter and I agree with everyone that it won’t have a real impact on the number of applications you get. If I like your pets and your listing I would not be put off by her reply. If what she says was true, she would have at least mentioned it in her review, even if she gave 5 stars, (which is strange if she wasn’t happy), she could have mentioned that it was too hot or that there weren’t enough cleaning supplies and she couldn’t leave the house as clean as she would have liked. The fact that there’s no mention of that at all, proves her words are not reliable.

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Her response to you says it all.
Let her “report” all she wants. She clearly hasn’t a leg (or an ethical bone in her body) to stand on.
I hope that all of your future expeiences obilterate any memories of this awful one !

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