Comfort and safety as lgbtq

Sitter Questions, Advice & Chat
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Hello again,

I live in the wonderful state of Colorado. I really want to apply for sits in various countries such as the Uk, Spain, Portugal or similar. My hesitation is that I don’t know what type of reaction I will get when going into pubs, restaurants or local shops. Will everyone stop and stare? Will I be challenged? I don’t really pass that well and would really not want to be the subject of stares or comments. I would appreciate feedback from those that might be familiar with the smaller communities in the UK, Spain, etc. thanks

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Hi @RachelTG
I honestly don’t know what you mean. Why do you think you’d get reactions when you go into pubs, restaurants and shops. Why are they going to stare? Please tell us more

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I think every country is different regarding their acceptance level of the LGBTQ community. You might want to look research specific countries to get a better idea? Also, there may be travel forums specifically for LGBTQ people who might have first hand knowledge to share. No doubt, there are also some forum members who might be able to give you an idea of which countries are most welcoming and where you may feel the safest and most comfortable.

In the meantime, welcome to the forum!

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Hello @RachelTG,

A warm welcome to the forum we’re glad you’re here and asking an important question. I do not belong to the LGBTQ community so I cannot give you first hand experience but I can say we have many members that do belong to the LGBTQ community and some of them share their experiences traveling on social media.

I’d be happy to guide you to their profiles if you think that could be useful? As @Kelownagurl mentioned talking with others in your community whether on forums specifically for LGBTQ community or reaching our directly could help inform your decision. I’m also attaching two articles that could be of help as you think about where you might feel comfortable traveling to.

Before my first visit to the middle east as a young solo woman I reached out to the online community “Girls Love travel” to talk with other women about their experiences traveling as a solo woman in the middle east and it certainly prepared me the best for my time there. The GLT online group does have a sub-group for LGBTQ members and allies.

I hope you find a sit in a country you feel safe and comfortable in!

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Thank you so much for your support and information. I would love to connect with other members of the LGBTQ community.

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I guess I am just worried… I know who I am now but not everyone is accepting of my decision. There are places in the USA I can’t go because of the violence towards the LGBTQ community. I am afraid of being hurt. Being transgender is very hard and as a senior, even more so. I just want to enjoy beautiful places and meet people who will accept me as I am.

Hope that helps
Rachel

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@RachelTG You have every right to feel the way you feel and I hope we as a community can do ur best to guide and support you with the tools and information you need to help you on your THS journey.

Do you happen to use Instagram? The THS LGBTQ members share most of their travels on Instagram but some of them also have blogs/vlogs…Let me know what you would prefer and I’ll send you a DM with the links.

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I grew up in Colorado and I live and travel in Europe most of the year. People in Europe will not care about your lifestyle. In fact, in my opinion, spending half my life in Colorado, and the last few years in Europe, the people of Colorado are far less tolerant of the LGBTQ community by a landslide.

In Europe, no one will stare, or smile at you but that’s just the norm.

I do understand why you are nervous but you feel that way because of intolerance of Americans not Europeans.

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Thanks Rachel, yes that helps. I’m glad you know who you are but am sorry you have to worry about how people will react to you. I hope you find the confidence to walk out there with your head held high and enjoy a housesitting lifestyle. The animals won’t judge you :wink:

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Hi Rachel. Sweeping generalisation time, but the UK is a nation of people who don’t like to stare! :slightly_smiling_face:

In the bigger cities, where there are well-established communities of all different types, you’ll most likely have no issues at all. In those places, people less likely to notice if you look in any way unexpected because there’s heaps of alternative sub-culture stuff going on and so many people are trying to look different.
In London, people barely look at each other at all! It’s a wonderful place to be anonymous!

Quick tips: A trans colleague of mine has just been working in Edinburgh, Glasgow and Aberdeen and she’s had a fabulous time.
In England, Manchester has a vibrant LGBTQ+ scene and Brighton has become a very famous LGBTQ+ hotspot.

If you want a traditional UK pub experience, the craft beer community in the UK is the most welcoming place and always trying to strive for LQBTQ+ equality. I can point you in the direction of loads of great places where you’ll receive a very warm welcome.

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Hello @RachelTG
Your concerns are certainly valid.
As an American long time traveler, it has been my experience that the UK and Europe have a much broader sense of live and let live, generally speaking in larger more progressive cities.
I am not a member of the lgbtq community but my travel and first hand experiences as a sitter have truly broadened my outlook. In my opinion every country will have some diversity and cluster of groups, favorable and not.
As has been shared, look online and start to get a feel for what places would be most favorable.
It’s impossible to know for certain but lean towards those places as you start and test.
Btw, you look fabulous.

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I appreciate your feedback. I was more concerned about smaller towns where, I find, people have lived there for generations and tend to be more conservative. I don’t own a soapbox and would feel bad to bring attention to myself. Again, I appreciate all the feedback received.

Rachel

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Hello Kelly. Please send me a dm to further this conversation

Rachel

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HI @RachelTG, I am a member of the community, as a cis woman with a cis female partner, my lived experience is obviously different than yours, but I hope I can help to alleviate some of your concerns, especially when it comes to the UK. The type of violence so prevalent in the US isn’t so blatant in western Europe and the UK. That’s not to say there isn’t any discrimination or anything, but it’s less obvious and much less extreme.

My partner and I, who have been together for 16 years, have never faced issues in the UK, and when we are there, we spend most of our time in small towns and villages. The Calder Valley in Yorkshire is my favourite place, there is a small town there called Hebden Bridge that you might really like, it’s a beautiful little place with a few nice pubs and great walks, and it’s very LGBTQ friendly.

For bigger towns, Manchester is a brilliant city with a great scene, if you go to Manchester you have to check out Canal St, it is a thriving area full of life, very open minded, very fun. As @Pips mentioned, Brighton also has a large community.

Spain is one of the most accepting countries in the world, maybe less so in the smaller communities, we have never had an issue, however I travel alone quite a bit and can easily be mistaken for a straight woman so take that with a grain of salt. Barcelona and Madrid are some of the most LGBTQ friendly cities in the world. The Canary Islands are also very openminded and LGBTQ friendly, apparently Gran Canaria is somewhat of a hotspot. I haven’t been there, but I have spent quite a bit of time in Tenerife, which seems to be quite openminded and accepting, so that may be a good spot for you to test out as well. Bonus points for Tenerife too as it’s really beautiful and has great weather all year round!

I 100% understand your nervousness and hesitancy but I hope that you will be able to really enjoy your adventures, the same way anyone should be able to. All the best!

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Thank you Lindsay. That helps

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