Hello All,
I have chosen, after living with family for 4 years, that it is time for me to move on. I am doing local sits right now in exchange for rent b/c rent is SO expensive, then add on the util, internet and cable. I thought THS could be a great option to save money to get the place I want.
I think this is a little trickier for me and my family b/c I owned a pet sitting business for 15 years that I did for monetary purposes and was very successful. I’m now in a completely different field where I am able to work remotely. Having a family of entrepreneurs makes it even more tricky to wrap their heads around providing a service and not getting “paid.” And it not look like to them that I’m homeless since I’m doing this locally. I can easily rent a room, but b/c I am never home, and me sharing a home vs my own space in someone’s home having much more is a no-brainer to me. It’s hard to justify the cost. Who else is living this lifestyle? I would love to hear from anyone who has the support of their families in these circumstances.
2 Likes
We’re full time sitters (for free). Short term - ignore what your family say! YOU DO YOU! They’ll understand eventually when they see you how much you enjoy what you’re doing, for free.
Something to help them understand, is that when you were paid to sit, most of your sits were probably 1-2 weeks max.
Whereas we’re on a 6 week sit at the moment, so we don’t travel around from place to place like when it’s shorter stays — longer sits are fantastic, and that’s the beauty of THS, there are loads of longer sits, as well as 1-2 week ones.
With longer sits there’s no additional fuel or transport costs, no packing bags every 1-2 weeks, no upheaval, no loss of days to travelling, no loss of time and money figuring out which grocery shops or cafes are cheapest/best, because we already got to know that in the first week. Instead you can switch off more.
When you do your first longer sit, you’ll realise you made the right choice, doing what you wanted to do instead of listening to family. You don’t need to tell them they’re wrong, you just need to make them see how much you love embracing this lifestyle.
Plus you can always tell them that if it doesn’t work for you, you can swap to paid sits more or less overnight if you decided to, because you’ll also have your reviews from THS.
Ignore them, it’s your life. They’ll come around when they see how much more relaxed you are.
7 Likes
My husband and I started sitting full-time in 2014. Our families have never outright criticized how we live or said anything negative about it, but I do sense that they probably don’t get our decision. I don’t think any of them could picture living the way we do and that’s fine.
So I can’t speak to how to handle any outright questioning or criticism about this specific topic. But in a more general sense, the best advice I can give is exploring your own thoughts about your decision. Other people’s criticism and questioning of our choices only bother us when we have our own doubts and lack of clarity.
And it is important to be able to admit and explore that to whatever degree it seems to be present. If we don’t then we will continue to be bothered by what they say and blame them for any negative feelings we experience as a result.
It sounds like you have very good reasons for choosing to do this and have thought it through, and as you gain confidence in your choice, other people not understanding it won’t bother you as much. You won’t feel as strong a need to make them understand. You won’t feel as strong a need to defend your choices and have them validated by others.
It is also important to remember that if other people are giving us a hard time about our choices, it is about them and how they feel about their own lives. Your choice to do something unconventional like this, something that affords you a type of freedom many don’t have, is likely pushing their buttons in some way. And for most people, they aren’t going to explore that, they are going to project it onto other people in various ways, including criticizing their choices.
Enjoy your adventure and good luck!
9 Likes
I’m also full-time.
Essentially nothing I’ve done in the last 20 years has made sense to my parents. I’m used to it, and they’re used to it at this point. Many of my friends also don’t get it and/or see it as a poverty-based decision. Oh, well. 
Yes, it’s a service I’m providing… but I’m certainly not getting nothing in return. Like you, I see it as a no-brainer. For the amount I’m saving each month on rent and bills – and since I’m often living (sitting) in much nicer circumstances than I would be on my own dime – I’m very happy with the overall arrangement. Not to mention the perks of experiencing new places and getting plugged into local culture and of course, the cutie pets that I get to care for.
I work remotely and used to pay for stays around the world. Now, I laugh a little inside when I read through forums associated with those communities. I’m saving so much money and doing almost the same thing I used to do.
As @HappyDeb pointed out, longer-term sits are even more economical and stable (in terms of daily routine) than short-term ones. (Although local short-term sits are a great way to build up a track record on the platform when you’re new!)
It doesn’t matter if they get it. If it’s a good idea for you, your goals, and your life, embrace it and don’t look back.
7 Likes
Some of the best advice I’ve ever received is: Once you reach the age of 18, treat your family the way you would your friends. It sounds counterintuitive, but it has been magical in terms of transforming my family relationships. If a friend seemed to not understand my choice to sit, would that bother me? Probably not. And how might I explain my choices to my friend? Explaining that same way to my family - no defensiveness, no justifications, just open heartedness and curiosity - alters the dynamic in wonderful ways.
This works great with sits, too. I wouldn’t leave a dirty countertop for my friends; I’m sure as heck not going to leave one for an HO. And as an HO, I wouldn’t expect my friends to, say, mow my lawn if they’re looking after my cat. So I’m not going to expect the sitter do to that either.
5 Likes