HO here and relatively new. We have had 4 great sitters this year and one I am dreading. I foolishly accepted this sitter at the very beginning, not doing my due diligence.
Red flag #1, was not willing to drive 30 minutes to meet. #2 asked for access to kayaks without any other commentary. #3 Sent them welcome guide but not so much as a thumbs up. #4 We decide to cancel a camp trip due to poor weather but said we’d go to a hotel if they wanted to continue. They opted to “postpone” and now they’re coming next week. #5 asked if tween daughter could come. Again. no other commentary and it is clear in our listing that this is a sit for 1 or 2 adults only. #6 No other communication despite the sitter insisting on only communicating via THS platform.
I’m terrified to go on our trip. I plan on being as charming and generous as possible, but I don’t trust these folks at all based on the above. Any advice? I’ve learned a lot here and don’t plan on making this mistake again.
Don’t do something you don’t feel comfortable with. Cancelling sits should only be done in exceptional circumstances but, and this is a big but, if you’ve made a mistake and don’t think it’s a good fit better to cancel now and not risk things going pear shaped at a later point. I’m a sitter - relatively new but appreciate how important that good fit is to have happy pets, HOs & sitters. You’ve learnt now from hosting a few sitters. Trust your gut.
You could simply reply, we are unable to host your daughter. I will therefore cancel the sit for you. Thank you for letting us know.
Cancel this sit. Twice we’ve allowed sitters to come into our home even though there were red flags. We wish we would have listened to our inner voice.
I’m a HO too. Cancel the sit. It’s not worth worrying about. Especially if they asked at the last minute to bring their daughter.
If you are already feeling this way before they even get there, it is probably best to cancel.
If things transpire between a sit being confirmed and it starting that makes either party uncomfortable for any reason, that host or sitter is well within their rights to cancel.
A sitter should not feel like they must go to a sit they no longer feel works for them, and a host should not feel like they must invite a complete stranger into their home about whom they now have serious concerns.
As someone who has been doing this for 11 years now, I can’t stress how important a role trusting our feelings plays in minimizing risks and making the experience go as smoothly as possible.
I always give my email and phone number and communicate with different methods that the HO feels comfortable with. If you are not trusting the situation, I would cancel
I simply told her she could not bring her. I’m still stuck with them. I didn’t think i was allowed to cancel a sit based on my gut feeling.
@Kimbyeya
I don’t see all of these points as necessarily red flags
I think that many 5 star sitters would also do points 1 and maybe point 3 .
I don’t understand point 4 about postponing?
Point 5 - you don’t have to agree any additional people in your home . This request changes what you initially agreed on . You can refuse the daughter coming and if you don’t think that the sitter will stick to the agreement cancel the sit .
Point 6 - not necessarily a red flag some sitters stick to communicating via THS so that there is a record of everything .
THS says that you should only cancel a sit for extraordinary circumstances. However they can’t force you to have a sitter that you feel uncomfortable with stay in your home . This is about mutual exchange , if more information has come to light that makes you feel this sitter is not a good match you should cancel .
Be honest about your reasons -
If the sitter complains about the cancellation THS may send you a “reminder “ not to cancel unless there are extraordinary circumstances and may also keep a record of the cancellation) so if a host repeatedly cancelled sitters without a good reason they may investigate or ban them .
I didn’t think my gut feelings were considered a valid extreme circumstance?
It was a culmination of all thiose things…separately, no big deal, probably.
THS has that in their terms and conditions but in reality sits get cancelled for all sorts of reasons. In all honesty, I think that ‘clause’ is kind of silly. There are all sorts of valid reasons for why sitter or host may cancel that don’t fall under the category of some dire emergency, and I highly doubt THS is kicking people off the platform left and right on either end.
There is a possibility if you cancelled they could raise a formal dispute against you that could in theory put your membership in jeopardy. In reality, this is highly unlikely in a case such as yours.
Ultimately it is up to you what you want to do, but know that THS can’t force anyone to do anything or dictate you must allow this person into your home.
Oh, I see. I thought she had not responded since the request. Since she agreed not to bring her, you may not have “acceptable” grounds to cancel.
HOs might cancel for as many different reasons as a sitter might cancel. There is no one vetting cancellations by either party. I would have no problem cancelling a sitter if communications raised new flags after extending the invitation to sit.
THS says that you should only cancel a sit for extraordinary circumstances. However they can’t force you to have a sitter that you feel uncomfortable with stay in your home . This is about mutual exchange , if more information has come to light since you confirmed the sit that makes you feel this sitter is not a good match , you should cancel . Better to risk a rap on the knuckles from THS then ignoring your gut and having a terrible sit experience .
Be honest about your reasons for cancelling -
If the sitter complains about the cancellation THS may send you a “reminder “ not to cancel unless there are extraordinary circumstances and may also keep a record of the cancellation (so if a host repeatedly cancelled sitters without a good reason they may investigate or ban them ).
I don’t understand this - are they coming on different dates than the original sit?
I just texted a human @ THS…they said I do’t have an “exceptional excuse” to cancel 
But they can’t force you to have a sitter in your home that you don’t want .
We wanted to cancel our earlier camp trip to foul weather. They agreed. But instead of “going away”, they requested a reschedule. Again, my novice self set up this sit which worked for her, unfortunately.
Because she refuses to give me her phone number, I would have to text this and I fear my words becoming misconstrued and a bigger problem.