Two sits I have recently booked, on opposite sides of the country, have this strange thing: The homeowners “padded” the listing by two days on either end so that it appeared, for example, that the sit was for 14 days when in fact it was actually 10. In both cases they were clear on the video calls about what they actually needed and said they had put in the extra days in case I wanted to arrive early to get to know the pets with them in the house, and as a safety measure in case their flights got delayed on the back end. In both cases, they actually had local family who could have stepped in had their flights had issues.
This was just AWKWARD. In both cases, they said I didn’t HAVE to come the two days early or leave the two days late, but I felt stuck. I know the Terms and Conditions say the owners aren’t supposed to be in the house during a sit, but still - it just made me feel weird. Plus, for the second one, they STILL haven’t told me what their ACTUAL return date is, making it hard for me to plan my departure flight.
I am writing this post partly for advice and partly in hopes that homeowners will read this and understand why this might be unpleasant for the sitter. Just be CLEAR in the listing that you have done this “padding” so the potential sitter can make an informed decision.
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For you, this is one trip a year. For me, this is something I will do DOZENS of times a year. Hanging out with strangers an extra four days for each sit gets - awkward. I like people. I love cats. I am an introvert and love just sitting around reading with a cat on my lap. Hanging out making small talk with total strangers is exhausting for me.
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I do NOT sleep well in a house where there are virtual strangers in the next room. You are probably perfectly lovely people. But my “stranger danger” radar kicks in when I’m trying to sleep and the only thing between me and a person I just met is a door which doesn’t lock and if it did, the stranger has the key. I have been background checked, reference checked, and vetted. You have not. Let me sleep with just the cats, thank you.
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There are other sits available where I can ACTUALLY be alone in a house with a cat for 14 days, reading my heart out, but I passed up that sit for yours. Only to find out that I get 10 cat days and 4 small-talk days.
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I try to plan back-to-back sits so I can go from one place and settle into another, without the hassle of finding a hotel night in between. Your padding forces me to choose between a rough night of sleep in a house with you in it and finding a hotel.
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It is super, super kind of you to offer to take me out to dinner when you return and show me the sights. So kind. But I don’t want that, and you made it impossible to decline, since I already indicated I was available on those dates. Just make it clear in your listing “Our flight returns at midnight on April 10th but we’d love for you to stay until April 12th and we’ll entertain you and take you to dinner on the 11th.” That is a big NO from me. For some sitters, it will be a big YES. Communication is key.
Probably I could write more, and in the future I will simply withdraw from/decline sits that turn out to be “padded”. Have other sitters run into this, and how do you handle it?
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I’d just state my preferences. Like, thanks for the kind invite, but I’d prefer to arrive and leave on X dates. Or, thanks for the dinner invite, but I’d prefer to dine on my own.
All sitters have free will and sits are supposed to be mutually agreed on. You don’t owe anyone an explanation for choosing to spend your time how you prefer. In doing so, there might end up not being a match between sitter and host, but that’s what communication is for. Hosts are free to express their preferences, but sitters aren’t obligated to accept sits or terms without mutual agreement.
On my most recent sit, my hosts kindly invited me to join them and their travel companions for dinner. I declined and had dinner out, but I joined them at the dinner table for chitchat after. It was very friendly and they were all nice folks. But I decide how much interaction I want, because of free will. There was nothing awkward about it, because we’re all grownups and were polite.
When we discussed departure, they also invited me to stay an extra night, if I wanted to. I said thanks, but I preferred to leave the day they returned. That also was perfectly friendly.
Our sit went well and they asked whether it would be OK to invite me back. I said sure, if timing works out.
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HOs should really be transparent about what they want in the listing. I would be annoyed if I applied to a 14 day sit and found out after applying that it’s only 10 days. I personally don’t want to spend multiple days in a house with people I don’t know. It extends the transition time from one place to the next as I travel and it disrupts my work schedule. I also think it shows that they are only thinking about their needs and not the fact that this is an exchange. Hosts can certainly ask for whatever they want, but they need to be clear in the listing. I don’t like getting big surprises during the chat and having my time wasted. It’s not that hard to be clear in the listing.
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That’s what I think but it seems some owners consider this unnecessary or don’t even give it a thought. There are too many listings where the responsibility section is “very simple, just look after the pets”. They probably think that is a universal concept.
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That is your preference and other sitters have others. Some sitters would like that padding time being available exactly to avoid spending money on accommodation and some sitters see bonding and getting to know the pet parents as perks (and sometimes purpose) of petsitting. I wouldn’t say handover time is a breach of third party (?) especially since it is an offer to make things easier for the sitter. Such padding time is here on forum often an advice to hosts to make a sit more appealing to more sitters.
You were given the information before you decide, it seems. Then you can decide whether the sit is for you or not, and/or discuss what is doable for you - or not. I’m not sure why you would book sits you consider awkward or why you would confirm sits without knowing how long it will last - re. lack of departure time?
I don’t want or need to stay the night with the host, so when offered I have one time scheduled my travel so I arrived early in the morning on their departure day, i have one time popped by to learn the drill a couple of weeks ahead (was on another sit in same area, so no trouble) and next time in April I’ve booked a hotel. Was offered to stay with host from night before departure but chose not to.
It is a matter of deciding what will work for you and communicating that. And also to walk away from sit if it is a no-go for you. I wouldn’t confirm a sit if the start and end-dates weren’t firm, for instance. While others don’t mind.
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This is a difficult situation as some HO’s like you have days handover before and after a sit. That can work with some sitters but some aren’t comfortable.
Me personally unless a repeat sit I’m happy to arrive the day before and depart the day the HO arrives back. Repeat sits are different as I agree to these as I know I get on with the HO so a few extra days if I’m available either side of the sit is fine.
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It would of been very easy for them to just list the dates they need a sitter for and then write in the listing that the sitter is welcome to arrive two days earlier or leave two days later if that would help them out. The way they are doing it is not the correct way and they need to be educated. They are probably extroverts who are thinking, she will be with a cat for 10 days so of course she will want people time with fun us.
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Yes, it is awkward to sleep in the same house as the hosts especially in our case as there are 5 of us and it seems more like a big slumber party. We have done it twice so far as the hosts left early morning. Recently we have had a couple of hosts who invite us over for the handover and then they opt to stay the night in a hotel that night. I did have a application that I sent recently and the host replied back that “we sound perfect!” and wanted to confirm us. No, I need my questions answered. After getting them, he had padded the front and back end just like you stated. No thank you. I turned it down and was annoyed it wasn’t stated on the listing as my time is precious. I could have watched another episode of whatever korean drama I was watching. 
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@KittySitter, welcome to THS Forum.
We’ve come across situation multiple times.
Suggest that there’s three aspects to this …1) your preference, or not, to briefly cohabit with Pet Parent, 2) real-life proactive tactics, 3) implications on THS platform,
Many of our housesits have involved arriving a day before Pet Parent departure. We enjoy this. It gives comfort to Pet Parent and allows for easy hand-over. We have sometimes, less often, stayed an extra day at end of housesit - typically at request of Pet Parent as they had a long return international flight and were concerned about delays. But this is a personal choice. You may well feel otherwise.
Housesitting is a trade. The terms - property, pets, responsibilities, timings - can vary a lot. When faced with opportunities or concerns then we have found that the best option is honest, open communication. We’ve completed housesits in many countries and so travel a bunch. Logistics can sometimes get stretched - say we can only arrive by a specific date/time or must leave by a specific date/time. Reach out to the Pet Parent. Express your preferences or requirements, as appropriate. More often than not, reasonable Pet Parents will seek to find a win-win outcome. Worst case, it identifies an issue that impacts viability of the sit - better know sooner than later.
THS platform allows housesitters to apply for housesits for which they have date availability.
Example … Listing states 1-14 May housesit but Pet Parent away 3-12 May (per your post). Suggest clarify departure date/time and arrival date/time of Pet Parent (sometimes details matter). Then propose arrival date/time and departure date/time that works for you. Once details agreed then consider encouraging Pet Parent to change dates per THS platform. If housesit dates per THS platform are longer than actual on-site time then this will prevent you submitting applications.
Housesitting is not a job. There’s no need to act like a subservient employee. Encourage determine your ideal logistics and proactively communicate those to Pet Parent. Who knows, perhaps they’ll say ‘yes’ and all is good. They’d be happy as you’re on-board and you’d be happy as can book other travels.
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You say I was given the information before I decide - but I want the information before I apply. I would not apply to a sit that involves four days with the hosts. I would CONSIDER one where I arrive the night before the hosts depart, and MAYBE stay until the morning after their arrival, IF they arriving at midnight or some similar time that means I spend minimal time making small talk. Two days on either end that is not disclosed in the listing means I wasted my time applying.
With the second sit where this two day thing happened, I told the hosts I would just get a hotel for those days - and they seemed offended. And I was annoyed both because of the hotel expense and the hassle of having to move before my next sit. I am quite capable of being firm in a conversation about my preferences. This seems to be a common enough situation that perhaps THS should make it possible to list both the actual “sit” dates and the dates the hosts are scheduled to be GONE from the house. That way those that find it more appealing can apply to those sits, and those that don’t can move on.
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This made me laugh out loud because you are probably 100% right!
They think they are doing me a huge favor and instead they are stressing me out.
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Why?
Application involves no commitment. Simply opens a conversation. You can withdraw after video call (ie more information).
If really concerned then mention related matters in your application.
You’re not going to receive further info prior to any application.
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Yes @KittySitter
we have had this on several occasions.
When at 10 day listing turned out to have four days of padding ( incase an overseas sitters flight was delayed as had happened to the host previously ) - so it was only actually a six day sit - we withdrew after the details became apparent in our video call .
For many other sits where the first night that was listed was an overlap with the hosts we have declined the offer to stay with them for that first night and sorted out our own accommodation for that night . We have arrived early enough to have a handover in the late afternoon and then done our own thing in the evening and then moved into the sit after the hosts had left the next morning. That’s our personal choice and something that we discuss with the hosts before agreeing to sit .
Some sitters enjoy spending time with hosts and sharing a meal together on the first and last evening , others don’t.
There’s no right or wrong . It’s a personal choice .
No one ( sitter or hosts ) has to agree to something that they are not comfortable with . The sit is not confirmed until both parties have agreed the arrangements.
I agree it is best when all this information about any overlap is stated in the listing.
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I agree, I don’t like having dinner with people I don’t know. Chit chat is enough. And also, don’t like spending the night unless they have a 5 am flight etc. And when they come back, I want to leave. First, I like to wash the linens and towels. How do I do that if I spend the night?
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I usually enjoy dinner with my hosts. Since those hosts had friends who’d just arrived to travel with them starting the next morning, I preferred to give them time to catch up without me.
Ummmmm, were we separated in utero !?!
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Because it wastes our time. I don’t care what people ask in terms of overlap, but it should be in the listing so sitters can choose to apply or not. It’s the sitters choice what they want to accept in terms of overlap with the hosts. It does take time to apply to sits, then there are messages back and forth to set up a time for a call, then to have the call. It’s a huge waste of time for both parties when information is disclosed in the call that would have stopped the sitter from applying in the first place.
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Precisely! It would have taken me 30 seconds to realize the sit wasn’t for me, given the four “small talk” days. Instead it took about an HOUR of back-and-forth, wasting my time AND that of the homeowner.
Plus, there was a different sit that I would have applied for, that had 16 actual “cat days”, that I would have loved. And I missed out on that one because of the one that was poorly advertised (and maybe the sitter who applied for the other one would have PREFERRED the four “small talk” days).
A different sit I recently did did the OPPOSITE: They posted their ACTUAL days where they NEEDED the sitter, and then in the call asked if I could come one day early and stay one day late (and were clear that it was fine if I could not). I much preferred that scenario. I agreed to arriving the night before to get the kitty comfortable - and even offered to take them to the airport the next morning - but said that I had to leave on the final posted date. They were fine with that.
For sitters who do multiple stays during the year, it requires a lot of logistical planning, including seeing which airlines fly into which city on which dates etc. I won’t apply for a listing if I can’t get a direct flight into a nearby city, and sometimes one day makes all the difference. Four days of “padding” on an advertised sit is way too many and homeowners just need to be clear in their listing. If they don’t want to change the listing every time, they can just state up front that their advertised dates typically include early arrival and late departure of the sitter.
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It was the thing I found hardest to get used to when I started sitting: Being expected to spend the night in a house with people I don’t know. Heck, I almost never spend the night with friends! It’s not about “stranger danger”, it’s just the awkwardness of padding around someone else’s house in your night things, while they’re still there. And that uncomfortable appearance at breakfast… Bleargh!
I’m very shy and like you, I find it very difficult to make small talk with people I’ve just met. Then there was the couple who ate in virtual silence.. I can’t do that either; I feel I should Make Conversation. I ended up with nasty indigestion, from being so stressed. So all in all, I totally agree about the awkwardness of “padding days”.
That said, it’s been good for me to have to adult-up and just get on with these awkward periods. As long as it’s just one evening at the start and one morning at the end, I can square my shoulders, put on a smile.. And make nice.
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Agreed, happened to us, it can get awkward for sure. I get why they do it but we have learned in the interview process to ask;
Have you booked your flights/travel plans ? What are the dates ?
That at least ignites the conversation about planned arrival and departure dates and you can reach an agreement.
Expecting us to be there a day ahead is understandable to me as long as everyone is on the same page and no one is surprised at the last minute..
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