The sit was for 2 cats - one who was amazing and cuddly and one who hid the entire time but the problem was the house. It was filthy. Like the bottom of the white cutlery tray was brown and the microwave was crusted with oil, dust, and pet fur. It also stank because they have two giant drooly dogs (which they took with them). It took days to air it out so it didn’t smell terrible and even then I still couldn’t sit in the living room because the furniture had absorbed the stink. So even with a blanket over the chair it was gross after my body warmed the fabric. The only place I could sit inside was the bed because the dogs don’t go into the bedroom.
I feel horrible because the owners are SUPER kind and generous and the cats are adorable but I just had to warn people about the gross house. When I changed the bedding the mattress and pillows were covered with mildew spots, the bed is lumpy, the kitchen is gross, and so on.
I really debated leaving the sit and was encouraged to do so by my friends but I hate breaking a commitment and I travel in a campervan so I was able to use my own stuff to mitigate exposure to theirs.
Anyway, I guess this is more of a vent than anything else because I feel incredibly guilty as it’ll likely impact their chance of getting future sitters but I just couldn’t let another sitter walk into that without warning them, regardless of how kind the owners are and how cuddly the creature was. Thanks for letting me vent.
I would say - you can say everything, it all depends on the words you use.
Said in a kind way (it is possible also if the house is filthy and gross), it could be a gift that exactly will get them sitters.
I tried the CoPilot AI-tool and asked for a kind and true text for a review, I got this
“The hosts are incredibly kind and generous, and their cats are adorable. However, the house was not clean, and the living conditions were challenging. Despite this, I appreciated their hospitality and the chance to care for their pets.”
Oh yeah. I started with all the good stuff and then at the end I covered the problem areas. I had a couple dozen people read it just to make sure and basically all of them said I was being TOO kind and generous. lol. But I don’t want to be mean just because people have different standards of clean. The HOs are elderly and partly disabled and my theory about the clean is that they just were so used to it they didn’t even notice it any more. Same with the odor, they’d become nose blind so didn’t even realize it was a thing. The review was long so I put a note at the top that it would not be suitable for anyone particular about cleanliness, with allergies, or who is sensitive to odors. So if future sitters didn’t make it all the way to the end they would still get the warning.
So sad to hear other hosts are taking you into their personal hellhole.
Also thank you on their behalf for not cancelling mid-sit.
That said, I believe you should definitely post a fair review. That would mean deducting stars where appropriate, and also explaining neutrally and clearly what should be improved to get those stars next time.
Please take a day to be able to write this without words like “gross” and “drooly”, but make sure to write your review truthfully. Other sitters will definitely thank you for it. Also make sure to get your criticism across to the homeowners, so they know what the problems are that they quite probably don’t recognise at all.
To be clear, I definitely didn’t use words like gross. I used words like “challenge”. This was just a bit of a vent where I can be a bit more blunt than I would be in an actual review. I would never say filthy and gross in a review but I definitely thought them. lol
Well done @CreatureCuddler for sticking it out when you really wanted to leave and for leaving an honest review to warn future potential sitters. While I have sat in some homes that didn’t meet my standards I haven’t been as unlucky as you, but I did dock them points.
I completely understand how difficult it is when the owners are kind and friendly but you did the right thing, and now with the blind review system it’s easier to be honest without using unkind words.
As has been suggested, your review may be a wake up call. I have experienced this as did a sit in Western Australia some months ago for two whippets. The lady owner was delightful and we got on immediately, however her home was full of stuff and the only chair available was uncomfortable so I also sat on the bed. The house didn’t smell but the cutlery drawer was filthy, fridge not so hygienic, dust everywhere, rusty chairs in the garden that couldn’t be sat on etc. I was honest in my review and suggested in person she might like to do some maintenance and clear the house before it fell down around her (it’s a lovely historic house). She took this advice really well and two weeks later told me I had been her wake up call and she’d started clearing things out, taking stuff to opp (charity) shops, got a cleaner etc etc. she was really happy and very grateful to me. Recently I got yet another message from her telling me how much better she feels and has continued renovating her home.
So, you may be the impetus for your home owners. If not, well, other sitters will have a clear picture of what they may be taking on.
Good input @Smiley . Yes, it is easy to not think of saying some things in the review and something directly to the owner. Not everything has to be published online. Like saying something generic about cleanliness in the review, and a kind tip of changing the pillows in a direct message, as an example.
If one is unsure of the reaction one can wait till the reviews are published. On the other hand, some things could perhaps be adressed while on sit. «You probably don’t know that the pillow has mildew. Is there another I can use?»
Spent the whole first day cleaning the house, dealing with flies, old food, trash, spiderwebs, catpiss on the bedding - kitchen and bathroom was basically a dumpster.
Even after airing out I had to buy flowers and air fresheners just to be able to sleep there😅
Sit ends tomorrow, and owners are incredibly kind- I like them a lot and this is just their ‘bohemian’ way of living.
Honestly don’t know what to do—it’s clearly not a 5-star experience, but it would feel like a direct criticism of their lifestyle. I can see why some might choose not to leave a review at all.
If you have a good feeling about what “standard etiquette/expectations” would be, then rate accordingly. Rememer though that you are not rating a hotel.
E.g., I would never expect five stars for tidyness, but if you rate me 3 or lower, I’d start asking questions and would be happy for input.
You review is mostly for the benefit of future sitters .
It should honestly state the things that you wish you had known before you applied for the sit .
It should be factual but that doesn’t mean that it should be unkind or make judgments about the owners .
It should include all the positive aspects of the sit to .
Since you’re super experienced, perhaps you can give us all a hint how you keep perspective, i.e., what your star rating would actually reflect. You’re not reviewing hotels, so standards will probably be quite different.
I’d suspect that there are very few 3-star ratings going around. It’ll mostly be five or one, in one case sitter/HO loved everything and just overlook little incongruencies, in the other case it was just horrible and the world should know.
So, how are you differentiating (if you do, which I’d suspect you do)?
Ha - you’re nuanced! Can you … I mean… kind of spin the yarn as to how many stars means what…? I’m not trying to pull your leg here, I’d really want to know
(oh yeah, and I concur with one of the earlier posts - the overall rating should be calculated)
Yeah, I know that posting of yours - that’s where the “not rating a hotel” bit comes from; I’m interested in what the difference between 2, 3, 4 stars is.
I guess “f the listing is accurate that’s five stars for me” is a simple way of doing it, but … hmm… I still don’t know what’d be 3 then…
So I gave a 2 for cleanliness because while it was bad, it could have been much worse - like the other sit mentioned up thread with garbage and rotting food. Honestly based on that maybe I should have done a 3. lol.
5 for me means everything was great. I gave a 4 for communication, mostly because they were a bit technophobe so getting directions was a bit cumbersome as they don’t know how to use Google maps and they included things like turn left at x farm - as if I knew where x farm was. lol. But, now they have a Google map link to share in the future and at least part of the issue is me and how I prefer to receive instructions so I couldn’t knock them too hard for that.
I can’t remember the other categories or what I gave them
You could do the calculation on your own of the average of the category stars. so if you gave 4 5* and a 1*, the average would be 4 so you’d use that for the main rating.
This was just a bit of a vent where I can be a bit more blunt than I would be in an actual review. I would never say filthy and gross in a review but I definitely thought them. lol