Just posting this to get this off my chest… I’m really stressed right now.
We’ve just experienced a disappointing situation with a sitter.
We confirmed a sit with this sitter couple three months in advance (for late December to early January). About a month after confirming, I had an issue and asked them if a cancellation was possible. At that time it was still two months before the sit, and they hadn’t provided any travel details yet. Their response was that if I canceled, it would cause them financial difficulties and they asked me to find an affordable alternative place for them to stay. I felt I couldn’t do that, so I said okay, they could still come. I went ahead with my original plans—even though after that point my flights became non-refundable.
Then one month before the sit, we still hadn’t heard anything about their arrival, so I reached out again. Their reply was that they now wanted to cancel on us.
How ridiculous is that? They said it was due to a family situation and that they needed to end their trip early, but after hearing their earlier explanation about finances and how they couldn’t afford a cancellation, it’s hard to trust that’s the real reason.
Now if we cancel our flights it will cost $200 (I’m not wealthy so that’s a lot for us). It’s also very unlikely we’ll find another sitter now because flight fares are extremely high around New Year (we live in a popular ski area). I reopened our listing a week ago but haven’t heard from anyone.
I’m feeling frustrated and anxious, worrying that we’re either going to lose money or not find someone to stay with our fur baby. I know the Premium plan covers sudden cancellations, but since their cancellation was one month in advance, I don’t think it qualifies for compensation? (I’m not Premium yet, but considering it now.)
Fellow HOs, if you’ve had similar experiences, please share. I’m aware it’s not a disaster situations compared to worse cases, and I know, they might really have to cancel the sit for their family’s sake. So I’m not necessarily looking for solutions, but I’d love to hear how you managed to stay positive and refocus on the happy things after something like this. Thank you very much for reading!
So, to recap; neither could afford to cancel, both had issues and wanted to cancel, and now that it’s effectively cancelled, it’s an injustice because… what, the timing? Or rather insufficient screening before confirming?
I know it’s not a pleasant situation to be in from your side, but perhaps the sitters look at things differently.
Maybe when you originally tried to cancel, it may have left them feeling in limbo, especially with it being over Christmas/New Year, and even though it still ended up going ahead, maybe they just weren’t as excited about your sit as they once were, so the level of commitment towards you may have dropped slightly.
With hindsight, you should have just cancelled it with them when you were going to, instead of potentially cancelling their christmas and then not.
I’m sorry this has happened to you, because it was really fantastic you originally gave them 3 months notice, that’s amazing. But this is just one of those occasions, when I can understand it from both sides.
Yes, this is correct. THS Sit Cancellation Insurance has significant limitations - for both parties - including cancellation maximum 14 day before start date. Neither party has coverage if cancellation occurs prior to this time. There are THS Forum threads that clearly state ways in which THS coverage could be improved, but we are unaware of any changes in some time.
Really sorry to hear of situation. Simple is usually good. While you seem a generous person then Pet Parent has no responsibility under THS terms to provide support to find alternative accommodation. Shame that this backfired. Likely, given intent to cancel, housesitter assessed elevated risk and changed their own plans - that would be understandable.
THS does not publish data on sit cancellations - number, party cancelling, timeline, etc. They do seem relatively rare but ultimately life happens.
That’s a good point. I just wish they had told us earlier if they felt suspicious about us, while I could still have gotten a full refund from the airline… At this point it’s just spilled milk.
You tried to do the right thing by them, but they have not returned that. I feel to tell you they would be financially out and ask for help is a bit on the nose, designed to make you feel guilty. 3 months out seems like enough time for them to sort something else which they clearly did. Better luck next time.
I’m really glad you shared this — situations like this can leave you feeling stressed and second-guessing everything, so getting it out of your head is already a healthy step.
What you’ve described would rattle anyone. You tried to be flexible when you thought you might need to cancel, and instead of meeting you halfway, the sitters put you in an uncomfortable spot. Then for them to back out a month before the sit… it makes perfect sense that you feel frustrated and a bit let down. Anyone would.
Even if their family situation is genuine, the timing and mixed messages around finances would naturally make you question things. You’re not being harsh — you’re simply responding to the information you were given.
A couple of thoughts that might help ease the pressure a little:
– You’ve already done the right thing by reopening your listing. New Year sits can still fill surprisingly last-minute, especially in desirable areas like ski regions. Some sitters are spontaneous and watch the calendar for last-minute options.
– You are not at fault here. You communicated early, clearly, and respectfully. The stress you’re feeling isn’t a sign that you’ve mismanaged anything — it’s just the emotional hangover of dealing with an unreliable response.
– And even though the Premium plan might not cover this cancellation, it’s still understandable that you’re now considering it. Protecting your peace of mind is never a bad investment.
In the meantime, please know you’re not alone. Many of us have had a sit wobble like this, and it always feels worse in the moment than it does in hindsight. You will get through this, and you’ll feel grounded again — sometimes it just takes a few days for the emotional dust to settle.
Sending you calm and clarity while you figure out next steps. And truly, thank you for trusting the community enough to share what you’re going through.
@Misaki it does help to get things off your chest which you have done by coming to the Forum. I feel for you but unfortunately this situation does occur.
My suggestion moving forward is to make sure you remove your dates briefly then re-post your listing. This will then make it a New listing. You can repeat this action as often as you need to.
As you are competing with thousands of other owners for a sitter over the festive season, make sure your listing is the most attractive you can make it - great, clear photos (including what it’s like over winter), clear responsibilities and a very welcoming tone which includes why sitters would enjoy coming to your place at this time of year.
Even ask a friend/neighbour to look at it or check other listings in your area for that period to see how your competition is displayed. All the best.
I’ve also learned a lesson as a HO: as long as you give reasonable notice it is better to cancel the sit then try to move ahead and accommodate the sitter. Sad but true, and as the HO you do have that option.
For your current situation though, not much you can do. If you can’t find anyone locally to look after your pets then cancelling is the only option. For the premium insurance the sitter has to cancel a week prior (I believe).
I’m sorry that you are in this situation and I can understand why you are disappointed and have doubts about the truth of the reason given .
Regardless you can’t make them come and house sit . So it may help your mindset to believe the reason they’ve given that they are dealing with a family crisis .
It’s always important to have a Plan B incase there is an extraordinarily circumstance that means either sitter or host has to cancel .
We are sitters and we’ve had a couple of sits curtailed because the hosts came back early - The hosts became seriously ill / had serious accident which necessitated them ending their trip and returning home . Whilst this change was stressful and did cost us money, we thought nothing of having to adapt and change our plans .
So it may help your mindset to believe what your sitters have said and that they are dealing with a family crisis .
Whilst I take you point about flights being expensive , it may not be too late to find a replacement sitter and you’ve nothing to loose and everything to gain. You could link your listing to your forum profile and get suggestions on making it the best it can be .
Alternatively you said you had an issue which was making you rethink about whether to take the trip so maybe this trip is not the best time for you and you’ll be happier staying home .
“a plan to Pet Parents in respect of loss from having to source Alternative Pet Care due to a Sitter cancelling Unexpectedly, subject to the terms, conditions, and limitations shown below”
“Unexpectedly” means a cancellation that occurs 14 days or less before the agreed sit start date or during the sit, but before the agreed end date.“
That’s a very helpful tip, thanks. I’ll renew the listing regularly. We actually made the listing look pretty strict on purpose because we wanted sitters to feel a sense of responsibility (we once had a sitter who treated our place like a hotel). Tme to shift the approach to something more appealing.
Thank you, those are the words I needed to hear! I can’t tell if you’re a professional therapist or a really kind AI haha. But thanks to all the supportive replies here, I definitely started feeling better. I started to see things from the sitter’s perspective so that’s progress.
Yes, when they asked for an alternative plan I really thought they were gonna be in trouble because of us. But after rethinking it and reading all the kind replies here I can see that they probably would have been just fine too. Lesson absolutely learned.
Thanks for the link, I’ll read through everything carefully before becoming a Premium member. 14 days is pretty tight hey, especially for people like us who live in a destination that’s expensive to travel to.
I come from a culture where being kind to strangers is one of the greatest virtues, so I felt really guilty about the idea of cancelling on them.
Despite best intentions, stuff does happen in life. Two Pet Parents cancelled our international sits on first day of sit, after we were in-country. Ugh. Difficult times. Each time we scrambled an alternative plan. Once this partly involved an alternative housesit (different profile to our typical sit). Second time we were eligible for THS Sit Cancellation Insurance and secured an AirBnB. Each time the Pet Parent had a reason for cancelling. Nothing we could do but move forwards positively.
I believe that there is a boxer Mike Tyson quote of “Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the face”. Rather brutal but does make the point.
Hi @Misaki, I have read your listing and yes, it comes across as very strict! Much of what is in the Home and Location section belongs in the Responsibilities section as there is very little about your apartment and the attractions of your town. You include use of your car which is good. Past sitter reviews are positive but when did you introduce your strict requirements?
I understand this and am sure you are a very kind person but your listing doesn’t reflect this and the welcome a sitter would be given. Remember that yes, you are offering free accommodation, but sitters are offering free pet care and security of your apartment and, unless they are local, are willing to spend money to come to Japan in the festive season so you can enjoy your holiday and/or time with your family. Time to let that previous experience go and make your kind and welcoming nature shine through in your listing.
