Is THS suitable for a pet-free sitting but where they would be an emergency contact for a nearby relative?

Owner Questions, Advice & Chat
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We’re new to THS and this forum, and would welcome some advice from members as to whether THS would be suitable for us.

We don’t have any pets but I have seen posts from other people that are just looking for a house sitter without pet responsibility. We regularly go away on holiday and my registered blind mother lives 2 houses away from us. She’s very independent, has a guide dog, and does her own thing, shopping, meeting friends etc. Whilst we were on holiday this summer, the large skylight in her kitchen shattered, raining glass down on both her and my sister, who was visiting from France. It was all sorted out quickly but made us realise that it would be really helpful if there was someone around when we were away that could help in an emergency, without relying on the goodwill of friends and neighbours (though they are always willing!). It this the kind of thing a Trusted House Sitter could do? In an ideal world, someone that would perhaps contact my mother every day or every other day just to check that there are no issues, would be perfect. She doesn’t need any sort of care at all but occasionally she can’t find something she’s been looking for, or if a pipe burst, or her dog was unwell, she might need help.
If this isn’t an appropriate forum, does anyone know what might be suitable?
I look forward to hearing your comments - Thanks.

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Good question @Hollyhock

Usually on a house sit , a sitter is on holiday / and if an emergency arises eg plumbing issue , storm damage - ( we have had both happen on sits ) the sitter alerts the owner or their emergency contact . The owner then arranges for repairs etc . The sitter wouldn’t usually arrange for house repairs or fix things themselves .

So if an emergency situation arose at your Mums home - what would you be expecting the sitter to do ? Would they simply contact you to let you know ( in which case your Mum could phone you directly ) or would you be expecting the sitter to arrange repairs / take your Mum’s dog to vet / find things for your Mum .

How would a visiting sister know the local resources available ? How would any emergency repairs be paid for ?
What if your Mum became unwell - would you return home to care for her ( which would curtail the sitters stay ) or expect sitter to take on caring responsibilities ( which is not something an unpaid sitter would be responsible for under THS T&Cs .

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In your situation, I’d lean on neighbors if I didn’t have family or friends to serve as an emergency contact for your mom. I don’t think it would fit under THS terms and you’d have no recourse if they let your mom down. With neighbors, friends and family, there’s a relationship to maintain, so more of a sense of obligation. Plus, they’d know the area and its resources better. You might also ask folks at church, temple or such, if you belong to one.

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Hi Hollyhock, welcome to the community!

It sounds like you’re in a unique situation, and while TrustedHousesitters (THS) is mainly designed for house and pet sitting, there are definitely sitters who are open to non-pet-related responsibilities. But as others already said, it really needs a good communication beforehand. What do you expect, which responsibilities do you want your sitter to take on? Where are the limits? What can you provide? It would be necessary to mention all of this in your listing.

However, if you’re not entirely sure if THS would attract the right kind of sitter, there are other alternatives you could explore:

  1. Care-dot-com or Elder Care-specific platforms: While these often cater more towards caregiving, you might find individuals who are happy to offer light, non-caregiving support, like checking in on your mother without it being too formal.

  2. Nextdoor: Depending on where you live, you might also try posting on local platforms like Nextdoor, where you could find trusted neighbors or community members who’d be willing to check in on your mother during your absence. This way, you could tap into a local network that may already be familiar with your neighborhood and needs.

  3. Local Volunteer Networks: Some communities have volunteer organizations or services for people who might need a friendly check-in now and then. While these are typically for people with more serious needs, you might find someone willing to offer informal support on a short-term basis.

If you’re looking for a more informal and flexible arrangement than what professional services offer, THS might still be a good match with the right sitter. Just make sure to be upfront about the expectations so you can find someone who’s comfortable with the arrangement.

I hope this helps, and good luck.

Edited to comply with Terms of Service

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It sounds as though it might be a bit different from a regular sit, but including the responsibility of walking your Mum’s guide dog every day might bring it more in line with expectations, and would also be a round about way of ensuring that someone checked in with your Mum on a daily basis.

As others have mentioned though, you’d need to agree very clearly from the outset what your expectations of a sitter would be in the event of things going wrong at the house(s), or your Mum needing extra help whilst you are away. It sounds as though she’s currently pretty independent, so hopefully it would just be a case of someone being on hand if needs be.

Are you satisfied with the vetting used by THS, (along with sitter reviews from past home owners), compared to that of a company geared more towards supplying the sort of help you seem to be looking for? I think in your situation I might be looking towards neighbours/friends who you already know and trust, rather than looking further afield.

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Welcome @Hollyhock.

I’ve previously seen a listing, in the UK, where elderly mother lives in a separate annexe and sitters are asked to pop in to check on her and perhaps ‘share a glass of wine’. No more info than that, yet the sit gets filled and numerous reviews have been left, so it obviously works. I’m not sure how that fits with the T&Cs.

I think pertinent questions have been raised and I’d suggest you should seriously consider them and formulate response which would give you the safety net you’re looking for, and one for sitters too.

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We would definitely consider doing a Sit such as this!

I am sure there are many others who would do the same!

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I don’t think THS is the right platform for dealing with emergencies outside of your house. If you wanted someone there to water the plants and pick up the mail, make sure the roof doesn’t cave in, and discourages break ins by making the place look lived in, than get a housesitter. But a housesitter may be there to sight see, or work from home, and they can’t take on a job dealing with emergency care or checking in on your mom. Frankly, that’s an entirely different skillset.

As someone who’s been in the caretaker position for humans, I’ve got to say I would never take it on voluntarily, but I’m happy to walk dogs and hang out with cats if I’m travelling and willing to assume responsibility and change my plans if they have an emergency.

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Many thanks for your comments Silversitters, it’s given us things to think about.

We’d be in telephone contact with my mother, as we always are when we’re away, and would be able to organise any necessary repairs etc, but as my mother is blind, it would be much more difficult for her to clean up a flood or fix something that had broken. I suppose I would see any emergency as an extension of our house, with the sitter dealing with any immediate issue as they contact us to sort out the details. Any emergency that occurred in our house with a sitter whilst we were away would need the same approach.
Certainly, if Mum became unwell we would return home immediately and would stay at her house if sitters were in ours.
I supposed I envisaged that the sitter may need to go around may be once every 2/3/4 days to perhaps find something that she’s lost or just to check. It wouldn’t take more than 10 minutes, so much less than walking a dog. She has a regular cleaner and a weekly gardener, and she walks into to town daily so there is plenty of other contact. Neighbours and friends constantly offer and have helped in the past, but I suppose we felt that having a sitter might mean another level of contact that involved a small amount of responsibility in return for the use of our house. Of course, if the sitter was out and there was an emergency then friends and neighbours are there.

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Many thanks for your comments Maggie8K and, again, it gives us things to consider.

I suppose I would see the sitter as just another level of contact for my mother and us. Friends and neighbours are always offering and have helped in the past, but we have no family close by. I wondered if the sitter would be prepared to check just occasionally and if Mum needed anything, once she couldn’t find her television remote control for 3 days but she’s very stoic and didn’t do anything as we were away. Would the sitter feel there was a small bit of responsibility in exchange for staying in our house? A little like looking after a pet? We don’t want to bother friends and neighbours unless we need to. Of course, if the sitter was out and there was an emergency, we would contact friends and neighbours.

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I would do it as I have a lot of care experience. Maybe someone like a former nurse would be interested.

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Hi Fatamorgana, and thank you for all your comments. All the posts from members so far have been really useful.

We’re based in the UK so I’ll look for UK versions of the sites you’ve suggested.
I supposed the idea behind contacting THS is that I feel more comfortable where I think that someone is getting something in return for doing a good deed. The rare use of a neighbour/friend to help Mum is really welcome but I feel uncomfortable accepting their offers of help when we’re away. A little like those with pets asking a neighbour or friend to look after their pet when they’re on holiday. We’re choosing to be away and though any support that may be needed would be minimal, the risk that it may be needed from someone else, rather than us, is greater when we’re away. Friends have offered to pop in on a daily basis, which is not really what Mum would want, and have refused any payment for this (which I understand, but some have to drive here and it all takes time!). I’m trying to find a sensible solution and thought a sitter might work.

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Many years ago I did a “Workaway” in Wales and what caught my attention originally is the advertisement said “And we even have our own Grandfather at the bottom of the Garden”. It turned out to be a now retired but quite famous British actor. He was absolutely entertaining and funny. I would check in on him every couple days, we’d drink tea or wine and potter about the garden together. It was so enjoyable and such an honour to meet him.

Thats a long winded way of saying the site “Workaway” would be more suited for your needs. @Hollyhock
People do housesitting on that site but extra duties are included that are out of the scope of a THS contract. I’ve done workdays all over the world in various capacities, when I was younger, and throughly enjoy myself.

Good luck :cowboy_hat_face:

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IMO this would not fall within the scope of duties that THS covers. Could you get someone who is willing to do it? Sure. But it’s not really what this site is for so I’m not even sure that they’d let you list it. Can you find a teen in the neighborhood who could use some extra cash to pop around every day or so for a cuppa and to provide any help she needs?

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WE’VE DONE IT! I’d say the official answer is probably no… but we’ve done it in 3 occasions out of a total of 30+ sits. On all of those sits they were very savvy and switched on, just old, frail, and on their own, and they lived independently in the neighbouring houses. In all cases the home owners we sat for just needed to know they’d be helped ‘just in case’ there was a situation arose. Or give them a knock if we hadn’t seen them for a few days and have the odd friendly conversation now and again, but there was never a reason to knock, we always saw them quite regularly with staying so close.

We even took one to the local hospital, we didn’t have to, we could have rang for help, but it was our choice given the scenario, and the hospital wasn’t far away (she was/is fine, it was just a precaution, no first aid required by us etc). It didn’t feel like any of it was a chore, it was more a case of just being friendly, and lifting up the odd parcel that arrived for them on to a table, really simple basic things that most of us take for granted. We actually feel quite blessed that they all felt so comfortable with us to even ask us for help to do things like that for them, rather than asking another neighbour or waiting until their big ‘kids’ to return.

We sit as a couple, and we’re in our 50’s and 60’s, and I think this is one of those occasions where I think being slightly older ourselves and the fact we are a couple is probably the reason why we didn’t mind at all.

We’d happily do future sits with an elderly parent (or blind) near by, no problem whatsoever. We sit full time so we wouldn’t do sits with a parent week in week out, but a few times a year would be totally fine with us. We enjoyed every one we did.

Personally, I’d say write your profile, and say it would be lovely if you could find a sitter that bla bla bla, and see what responses you get. She’s not living in your home, so there’s nothing stopping you from getting a sitter via THS at all, so no rules are being violated on that front. You’ve simply put what type of sitter you would ideally like. I’ve seen additional sit ads via THS where the odd parent has come into things, along with the ones we have done, so it gets asked now and again.

Just an addition to this - because I just read you are in the UK. All 3 of the sits I mentioned plus the others I saw advertised are in the North East of England.

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Hi @Hollyhock

We would be more than happy to do a sit like this.

We once did a sit where the home host asked us if it was Ok if her mother came for a cuppa and chat one afternoon a week.

The mother lived alone and this was her regular weekly outing so the home host did not want her mother to go a whole month without getting out.

We agreed. The mother was lovely, and really interesting to talk to.

Our weekly coffee afternoons with her were the highliht of our stay!

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I would be happy to take on a sit as you describe.

Good luck

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I personally would think it would be very different to ask someone to take care of my pet and my gran. I am probably colored by the fact that in my country there is legislation with requirements to get access to homes of the elderly, police certificate and/ or authorization as health personell (an authorization that they can lose) and the fact that such personell would be screened by and responsible not only to me/ my gran but also to their employer.

Of course you can do it, but I agree that it will require a good think through and figuring out what the tasks really are and what would in fact be the responsibilities of a sitter.

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I would also like to do a sit like this. In fact, it really appeals.

As a solo sitter, travelling frequently from place to place, making friendships and connections is not always possible. To have someone nearby with whom I can connect and who would also benefit from company and the reassurance of having someone (as a kind of ‘middleman’) to deal with such issues, sounds really quite lovely.

I don’t think you’d struggle to find someone suitable on this platform and can’t see how it would go against the T&Cs, especially given you are not requiring any kind of care for your mother, and she would be living in a separate unit.

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Hi All,

Many thanks for all your extremely helpful replies. It seems that there is a very mixed reaction to our question and we will certainly look at some of the alternative sites you’ve suggested. Of course, we would never agreed to any form of house sit without both the sitter being fully aware of the situation and comfortable with it, and without both my mother and us being completely comfortable with the sitter and feeling that there was considerable trust and understanding there.

We appreciate your help and will think about the points raised.

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