Just had my first ever sit at my home and it was so horrible I had to cut my trip short. Obviously it was my first and last sit with TH. I was 3000 miles away celebrating my son’s wedding and had to attend pre/post wedding activities, so I could not fly home right away. My sitter was told I had outdoor security cameras covering the entire front and back of the house so there was no secrecy an about the cameras. I arrive my first night and missed my dogs so I used the camera to see them. Instead I see my pet sitter completely ignoring my dogs. One time she sat down on the chair swing and my dog came up to her with her tail wagging hoping to get some attention and she never even made eye contact with my dog. So I started watching my feed and there was not one time that she made eye contact with my dogs, talked to them or touched them. She was not being malicious, but she obviously didn’t love dogs and was not capable of showing them any love let alone acknowledgement. It was the most distressing situation. I contacted TH and the lady managing my case showed no understanding for what was happening. She suggested I speak to the sitter, but it was clear that the sitter had an issue where she couldn’t connect to my dogs. Talking to her would have been useless. I did send her a text saying the girls are used to getting a lot of love, so she started sending me photos of them in their dog beds, but continued to not engage or acknowledge my dogs outside where she knew there were cameras. It’s very clear she was not vetted well. Since she had to fly in I invited her to come a day early so I could show her around, meet my girls, get to know the neighborhood and settle in. I immediately noticed she was socially awkward with me, but thought it was nerves and that once I left she would be fine. But that lack of connection with me became a lack of connection with my dogs. I have 50 plus video clips showing her outside with my dogs and never once touching them or making eye contact with them. She was not mean, or malicious, but I believe she was incapable of forming any kind of connection with them. What made the situation even worse was the way TH failed to acknowledge the seriousness of the situation even after I sent them videos. The lady handling my case never listened to what I was telling her and made suggestions that were not on point. My sitter also changed her official bio to claim she lives in my town, even though it was just a temporary 10 day sit and now that the sit is over, she never changed it back. The case manager offered to speak to her and mention the change in her bio to see why she would do that but the sitter never responded back. That definitely should have been another red flag. I love my dogs and watching them be ignored while 3000 miles away was so distressing. I finally just left my son’s wedding celebration early because it was too upsetting. It’s clear there was a vetting issue but when that became clear the way the person in charge of my case failed to acknowledge, understand, or be helpful, only exacerbated the trauma. I read how so many owners have had such wonderful experiences, I thought this would be a great experience. I also thought since this was not a paid job, those wanting to watch my girls would do so because they truly loved dogs and it wasn’t just a paid job. I’m home early now and am trying to not only smother my dogs with love, but to make sense of the trauma I experienced and why someone who was not capable of forming any kind of connection could have passed the vetting process. I also thought this would be a perfect situation for me to take some future trips that I have been putting off, but after what happened here, I’m finished using TH. Has any other owner experienced a very bad sit where they needed to cut their trip short because their pets weren’t being cared for appropriately? I’m just very grateful I had the cameras otherwise I never would have known my dogs were being ignored. I recommend to all owners at a minimum to have your backyard monitored with a security camera, and make your sitter aware of the cameras so you are not secretly spying on them. It’s not expensive, easy to set up and you can ensure your pets are being well cared for. I am so grateful I had those cameras.
Hi @Oceanbeach,
I’ve read your entire message, which mostly repeats the same story, so I believe I’ve understood the situation clearly.
It’s very sad that you found a sitter who didn’t show affection for your pets. That goes completely against the spirit and purpose of this platform. Trust and love for animals are what it’s supposed to be about.
That said, your own behavior is also quite deplorable, so I’m afraid both you and the sitter handled things poorly.
Recommending the use of cameras on TrustedHousesitters feels completely out of place and contrary to the values of the community, at least from my point of view.
As animal lovers, both sitters and HOs, I believe it’s the responsibility of both parties to study each other’s profiles carefully, trying to get a perfect match in order to a win-win-win situation and also pay attention to possible red flags, and ensure pets are left in the best possible hands, while sitters feel truly welcomed and at home. Your home doesn’t sound like such a place.
Trustedhousesitters is about an exchange between animal lovers, a fair one.
Neither sitters or homeowners are vetted. It is up to each member to do their own ‘vetting’ process, usually via a phone or video call and reading the profile and reviews (if there are any).
External cameras are allowed as long as they are disclosed in the listing.
The experience must have been very upsetting for you and I can understand why you do not want a THS sitter again. I can assure you the the vast majority of sitters are genuine animal lovers.
I am sorry to hear you had this experience and I am sure it was very upsetting. There are a couple of things that stood out to me in your message that I wanted to comment on:
You mentioned that the sitter must not have been ‘well-vetted.’ It is really important to remember that THS is not providing pet and house sitting services directly, they are providing a platform for people willing to provide that service with those looking for it.
Beyond ID verification --and background checks for US-based sitters–they are not gathering any more information on the sitters to determine whether they can join or not. It is not as if providing this service requires some sort of minimum level of education or training where proof of such must be given to do so.
The company is not a direct party to these arrangements in any way or vouching for the sitters on the site. This is the case for many types of sites offering the services of people, pet sitting and otherwise.
As for your experience with customer service, I think like with many companies offering such, the experience can largely come down to the particular person you are talking to. In this instance, I am not sure how much they could have said or done. If it was a matter of the sitter egregiously violating some term or condition, or you were witnessing her mistreating the dogs in some way, it would probably be different, and there would be the potential to initiate an official ‘dispute’ against her. This is still an option with the outcome to potentially get the member removed from the site, but in this instance, I don’t think this would happen.
Again I am really sorry for this experience, but perhaps with a better understanding of how the site actually functions, that may help you feel better in the sense that the core of your upset seems to stem from misunderstanding how it all works.
And I know a lot of sitters especially are going to jump all over her for advocating for the use of cameras to monitor the well-being of the pets when outdoors and I know that is a sensitive subject.
But I think sometimes sitters fail to realize how much of a risk this can be on the host’s end and how nerve-wracking it can be to leave your pets and home in the care of complete strangers. So many just dismiss a lot of these anxieties by simply invoking the name of the site as if that should just shut it all down.
This doesn’t mean I am advocating for the monitoring of sitters, but simply that I can see the host’s concerns, especially when they do end up having bad experiences with the sitters.
@Oceanbeach I’m sorry that you had an experience that didn’t match your expectations with this sitter.
It’s seems that you have some misconceptions about how THS works .
Trusted House Sitters DO NOT
vet sitters for their quality, performance or how they interact with pets -
THS carry out simple Identity check only .. This is stated in the terms of service that all members agree to when signing up to become members .
“2.3. ….. You are solely responsible for making decisions that are in your best interests, including in relation to properties and pet(s) and vetting any potential Pet Parent/Sitter.
THE SERVICES WE DO NOT PROVIDE TO MEMBERS
4.1. We do not provide the following or any guarantees or assurances for any of the following:
4.2.6. checking the validity of Sitter References
4.2.7. endorsement of the quality or performance of Sitters”
Therefore , in this case , the response from THS Customer services to “speak with your sitter “ . seems appropriate advice given the circumstances and that you are the one responsible for vetting the sitters suitability .
Whilst having external cameras alerted you to the issue -it didn’t prevent it from happening.
What could prevent such a situation happening would be for hosts to take time to properly “vet” the sitters who apply for suitability for your pets.
This can be done by a combined approach of reading all previous reviews , having a video call or phone call before confirming a sitter to discuss their experience or if they are local arranging a meet up before the sit is confirmed.
I am a sitter and my reviews talk about how happy HOs find their dogs when they get home. I send pictures of the dogs laying with me, me brushing them. Did her reviews talk about how she is with dogs? And if she didn’t touch them when she visited, that is a red flag. I always connect with the dog on the previsit. I think you have to check out the application carefully on what they say about their experiences with animals. I take dogs on more walks than they are used to, since I really don’t know their signals to be let out and I find they like doing their business on a walk, rather than the backyard. These kinds of stories. Do they connect to the animals? I had dogs. Has the sitter ever had a dog?
Also, I do not have an issue with outdoor cameras. I find that if a sitter is living up to their responsibilities, they are not worried about outdoor cameras.
The experienced members that have already replied have given sage advice @Oceanbeach - one other note would be that sitters are advised to change their location to where they want to sit, not to be misleading but to help HOs see they are local for the time they’d like them to care for their pets. It’s not dishonest, simply strategic for travelling sitters. Sorry it didn’t work out this time, cameras don’t fit with trusted anything so good to find a match that feels like a fit. #betterlucknextttime
Sounds like a sitter who shouldn’t sit any pets who need attention and affection Maybe she should sit fish or plants. Please write an honest review to spare other pets who need love.
Did she have any reviews? What did they say? When you video chatted, did you notice that she was odd and how did she talk about pets? When she overlapped with you, did you observe how she interacted with your dogs? Those would have been your opportunities to vet her as a sitter — vetting is your responsibility as a host.
It sounds like you misassumed what THS provides, unfortunately. And unfortunately, there are bad sitters (and hosts). Fortunately, they’re in the minority. Otherwise, THS wouldn’t be able to get anyone to renew.
We seem to live in an era where many people don’t directly communicate with each other on things concerning them. I see it on this forum all the time. Sitters upset about something with the sit they are on and vent in the forum and don’t discuss directly with the PP. I am now seeing it with you. You used the passive aggressive way of making a general statement to her that your dogs like a lot of attention. Did you specifically say to her, I looked at the outside camera hoping to see Rover because I miss him so much. I noticed on the outdoor cameras that Rover is seeking attention from you and you are not responding to him. I chose you for the sit because I thought you were a dog lover. He may get demanding sometime but he is my baby and could you please shower him with more attention. It could be said in a nice way. If you only see her outside she may be very affectionate with him in the house and just needed a little alone time herself. I didn’t see her mannerisms so maybe you did pick up that she really wasn’t much of a dog person. I’m sure if you communicated to her she would give the dog more attention and you would not have to come back early which seems to be an extreme reaction.
That must have been horrible to watch. Most sitters on here love animals, it’s why we do what we do. For those that don’t, there’s other websites like couch surfing and volunteering sites that suits them best.
But just so you know, the sitters location IS NOT there home town. It is titled as “Where are you located”, so for some they choose their hometown and for others it’s where they are choosing to sit.
THS is just a matching service, with those that say they want to care for pets, with those that have pets. It’s up to everyone individually to trust their own judgement, we actually do the exact same as pet sitters. It’s a feel-good feeling we get about someone, and fortunately everyone has reviews to back things up too.
Your back home now, so give those dogs the hugest of hugs, I really feel for you and your dogs.
“The seriousness of the situation”… “The trauma” ..? Really??
Did the sitter abuse the dogs? Were they neglected or maltreated in any way? Were they traumatised when you returned?
This is just someone who appeared to be, for a particular period, paying your dogs no attention. Now, I grant you it’s not ideal. But how do you know she hadn’t been showering them with affection - when not on camera? Perhaps she just wanted to sit quietly with the dogs and have everyone do their own thing for a bit..
I coud understand your rushing home if you’d seen signs of active mistreatment, but this sounds to me like a real over-reaction. And rather melodramatic, actually. How much demonstrative affection (on camera, of course!) would have been enough? What if she’d only given them a quick ear-scratch instead of a full-on hug? Or only a short hug, instead of a prolonged embrace..? Oh, the horror!
I’m sorry, but you read some real horror-stories about maltreatment/hospitality abuse by sitters ; this ain’t one of 'em.
In your shoes, I’d have sent her a message along the lines of “BTW, did I mention that the dogs are love-bunnies and like as much fuss as they can get…?” - and given her a chance.
As an HO I don’t have any cameras, of any kind, anywhere. And the HOs I’ve sat for have never have anything more than the doorbell type. We’re all taking the wild risk of coming home to find that our pets are a few cuddles short, I know… But there’ve been no such experiences anything like as - traumatic. Lucky escape!
fledermouse,
I totally agree with you. It would be far better not to haver any cameras as then you would not be tempted to spy and would not have any concerns. And this is far better than the dogs stuck in kennels, where left alone all day and likely only taken out for a one hour daily walk, I will fuss now and again but not all the time. This sitter may have had other things to do, on line work, reading a book, contacting friends etc. Some dogs are lovely and will give you space and will sleep etc. but there are others who can continually want attention. It can get a bit much oif they follow you to the fridge, to the cooker, kettle and even the loo etc. and if trying to prepare a meal, chopping vegetablesd etc. they are there begging, the same for one eating, in fact have even had dogs stand on back legs jumping around table. At least she was there and there are no reports that she abandoned them for several hours on their own. And perhps she also took them out on much longer walks than normal. They certainly were not all on their own at night, as they would have been in kennerls. THis definitely seems an over reaction to me. And she may well have had them snuggled up to her o the sofa in the evenings, just that when outside she wanted a little time to herself and had been attempting to message family or friends in peace.
If the dogs were ft and healthy and plesed to see you on your return then there should be no complaints. Even a paid sitter would not be continually fussing over your dogs.
Maybe she could have given a little morte attention at times but not constsantly. You do not give food to a dog every time it begs for food for example.
This thread just makes me determined to avoid sits with outdoor cameras. I give the pets I sit for enough care and attention but I’m certainly not fussing over them 24/7. I have needs of my own and it sounds like the sitter here was taking five minutes for herself.
Considering you were able to form a full grasp of the situation solely through external surveillance and spying on the individual in question while outdoors, I can’t help but wonder..Do you keep your dogs outdoors permanently?
Cause that would seem to be the only plausible explanation…if that’s the case, one might reasonably wonder who truly deserves to be ‘vetted’ here
I want to reiterate that I never intended to use my cameras that I have had for 7 years to check up on the sitter. I also discussed the cameras with her and she had no issues with them. She did ask if I had interior cameras and I assured her that I didn’t have any interior cameras. I never had any concerns when I left my home and never intended to use my cameras to check up on her. As many dog moms I like to see what my dogs are up to when I’m away, and that is how I discovered what was going on. It was only then that I used them to check on the welfare of my dogs.
I also wrote the post not to vent although it sounds like I was, but my intent was to alert owners that there are sitters on the site who should not be watching your pets. It’s more of a warning to take extra precautions when accepting a sitter. This was my first sit, I clearly was inexperienced in how to choose a sitter. After this experience I now see that I should have done more to ensure my sitter had a lot of good reviews. Hindsight is 20/20. I guess I saw the sitters were vetted and understood that to mean they were not only given background checks, but went through an interview process. As I mentioned, the intent of my post was to alert owners who are new like I was to be much more diligent when choosing their sitter. I wish I had read a post like my post before I entered into using this site.
Wow, you just made an assumption that I did not communicate with her when I noticed an issue. I DID. This was an incredibly easy sit. All she had to do was feed my dogs twice a day and give them some love, make eye contact with them, and touch them, that is it… She did not have to walk them, let them outside as I have dog door, exercise them, play fetch or games with them. Just feed them and show them some love. Do I presume you are a sitter and not an owner? My dogs are 7 and 9 so I have had them in my life for a very long time. My kids are grown and they are my kids now. I love them deeply, and yes I miss them when I am away from them like any normal dog parent does. I am retired and spend 24/7 with them and I have a deep love for them, which is how a dog owner should be with their dogs. I did nicely speak to her about the girls in a similar way to your example, but nothing changed. Why would she show them love inside but not outside where she knew there were cameras? Not making eye contact with them when they walk up to you wagging their tails is not right. All she have to do is put her hand out and give then a rub, I don’t think that is asking too much for someone who told me they love dogs and would be very excited to stay with my girls. Coming home early may seem like an extreme reaction to you, but if your child was not being cared for, would you be comfortable staying away knowing they were not being care for? You made so many assumptions that were false, and perhaps you are not aware of the love many dogs parents have for their dogs, It is a wonderful, beautiful relationship where both parents and dogs benefit greatly from the love that flows both ways. Staying and celebrating knowing my dogs were upset would have been neglectful on my part. If you have kids think of the love you have for them and that is the love I have for my dogs, it is strong and their happiness and well being are vitally important to me.
This was my first time using TH. I did make an assumptions that the sitters were vetted that included some kind of video interview. I was wrong. Sadly despite being told I would have at least several options to choose from she was the only one available. I contacted 20 + sitters and they were either sitting already or going away themselves because it was a holiday week. She did sound like she loved dogs and told me she would excited to watch my girls, and she had one good review. I don’t know if she was also new to the site an that is why she had only one sit. My mistake was thinking the sitters were interviewed before becoming sitters. Had I know the vetting was just cursory, I would not have gone this route once I only have one option. I would have tried to hired a local sitter. I will add she was not a malicious person, I just don’t think she was capable of making a connection with my dogs. I think she likes pets, but has a personality trait that does not let her form a connection. When she flew out a day early, she had issues making eye contact with me, but I just thought she was nervous and would be more comfortable once she was on her own.
I understand that now, but I guess because she was on a sit in CA when we connected yet her bio had her living in the state where she actually lives, I thought it was odd that she didn’t change her bio to reflect her previous sit where she was when we connected, but did change it with me.
Agreed, this was my first sit and my last, and I clearly was lacking a lot of information about how the site operates. If I were to try again, which I won’t, I definitely would approach things differently since now I am better informed about how the site works. I was not experienced enough to be able to make a good choice. I also had no choice given it was a holiday week and the 20 sitters I contacted were either already booked or going away themselves for the holiday week. I only had the one option, and I did not pick up on anything off on our video call. Lesson learned…
You do not know me in any way shape or form and to call my behavior deplorable is uncalled for. I don’t know anyone these days who doesn’t have security cameras and video doorbells. If the sitter was made aware of the cameras, knew where they were and had no issues with them, then there should be no issue. Had I not wanted to see my dogs I would never have seen what was going on. Do you disagree for parents to have outdoor security cameras to check in on their kids when they are away? My dogs are a very treasured part of my life and they are my kids and their happiness and welfare is my responsibility. Any sitter who finds cameras unacceptable would be a red flag for me. I would never disagree to security cameras if I were babysitting, pet sitting or house sitting, At first I used my cameras to simply see my dogs because I love them and miss them. After I became aware of an issue I continued monitoring my cameras to check on my dogs not my sitter. To call my home unwelcoming was not fair given you don’t know me or how I prepared my home for her. I will share what I did and you can help me with advice on how much more I could have done to make my home welcoming.
I asked her for a list of her favorite foods, drinks and snacks. She gave me an extensive list and I made sure she had everything she asked for.
Knowing she didn’t have a car, I brought the bike I don’t use anymore and will never use anymore, to the shop for a complete tune up at a cost of $250 so she could have a way to get around. I bought a rear basket so she could go grocery shopping, bought a new helmet, a phone mount, and front and rear lights.
I sent her a document with neighbor contact info, local food and drug stores and restaurants along with care instructions before her visit so she could read it and write down any questions. I had her come a day early so not only could I show her around but so she could have time to settle in and take the bike to explore the neighborhood. She had a large room with a king size bed, bathroom and mounted tv. In the bathroom I had a new toothbrush, toothpaste, mouthwash, q tips, lotion sunscreen and a blow dryer, the shower had fresh soap, shampoo and conditioner. I have a lap pool in my yard and supplied her with beach towels. I have a back deck with a very comfortable swinging chair, a sectional and a fireplace. I left her graham crackers, marshmallows and chocolate to make s’mores. I have an outdoor bbq grill and showed her how to use it.
Her only requirements were to feed my dogs twice a day, keep their water bowl filled and given them a pet and some love when they come to her. I take them on 7 mile hikes 4 days a week so when they are home, they like just chilling out. She did not need to walk them, exercise them, let them outside since I have a dog door, play fetch with them or any other games. So please explain how I am deplorable and how I did not make my home welcoming for her. All I expected in return was when my dogs approached her with their tails wagging was for her to acknowledge them, make eye contact with them and give them a rub. That’s all they needed and then they go back to their dog bed or will sit in the sun. So please help me understand why I’m deplorable and how my home sounded unwelcoming. I would never make such comments about another person ever, but especially about a person I don’t know and about a situation I was not directly involved in. Despite my sitter not being honest about her love for dogs, I did not call her names or personally attack her like you did to me. I stated facts about a sit gone bad in order to help other first time owners like me understand that just because a sitter is on this site does not mean they had to apply, or have a video call before they could be listed as a sitter. That’s information I wish I knew ahead of time, and very important information for a first time user of this site. Clearly I’m cancelling my membership but if weren’t I know next time what to expect with the sitters and how to go about finding a good fit. I would be in a much better position to ensure I invite a suitable sitter. I appreciated the positive comments who offered advice which was helpful and I would have used if I wasn’t ending my membership, I found it helpful and constructive. i