This is how you get retaliatory bad reviews. It would be lovely if everyone could have a mature conversation but the fact is, some can’t. I recently experienced this after I left a negative review for a HO and they retaliated by opening a complaint against me even though they left me a 5* review. But magically, after they read my feedback, I suddenly caused a lot of problems/damage that was not mentioned before.
So no, it’s not always better.
That wouldn’t be helpful for others. Reviews need to be factual.
I don’t think a factual review is a rumor. If I read “there were crumbs on the kitchen counter” I may consider it is not important but I accept that as a fact. If I read “the house wasn’t clean” I don’t know if I would judge the state of the house in the same way or not. Also an owner may say the sitter didn’t clean properly and the sitter may say they did a good cleaning and both might be ”telling the truth” because cleaning standards are not universal.
I say rumour because the bottom line is that you do not know if it is fact. There are always at least three sides to a story - yours (seen from your perspective), theirs (not from your perspective) and what actually happened. In today’s world, people seem to feel that the only truth is theirs and all others are not. The bottom line is that you need to rely on your own instincts. A simple call to the host will tell me what I need to know.
I like long reviews, I’ve often found out more about a sit- the location, the sleeping arrangements, their favorite takeout- than I would from the owner.
Personally, my reviews get long when it’s a sit that might not be for everyone. Like there aren’t problems, but maybe some people don’t like cats that wake up at 5, cats that bring home dead animals, or the location is not as convenient as the owners think. Especially for sits that are off the beaten path ( like a small Carribean Island), I think owners forget that living there is different- so I add parts about those differences- getting groceries, getting around, bugs…
I get it. But I’m not sure how else Sitters or hosts get messages the feedback that people feel funny about giving. I’m thinking of a couple of sitting experiences I had with lovely hosts but lumpy bed or cluttered house. If it was airbnb I’d say something, but often the sitter/host relationship feels too informal and too intimate. Similarly with sitters, some things I’d feel petty mentioning, but I’m also thinking: “Other hosts should know this!”
I can only suggest honesty.
I thought I’d let you know i found your bed uncomfortable, its a bit lumpy. You may not know because its your spare bed and you probably don’t sleep in there but you might want to think about changing the mattress for when you next have guests.
That’s how i would word it and similar with any other issue.
But reviews are really useful. I always write reviews in booking, Airbnb, even tripadvisor. I am really grateful for other people’s comments and I want to correspond.
I prefer to choose what sit I apply for first, then I may or may not get to speak to the owner. It’s not my choice.
That’s often the case.
I started writing longer positive reviews after reading the forum because I am afraid that if I don’t mention some aspects people may read that they were not positive.
When I read a review I am looking to see if it generally aligns with the description of the sit or if raises some issues that were not apparent from the listing .
That is the point!
To inform others of the issues. To give a clear warning if necessary.
(And if you feel a review was too long: just stop reading!)
Well yes. A phone call after application.
Research is key for sure. For me places to eat are not important.
Sorry but I do not agree with that. I think discretion is better for resolution than exposure.
That’s how some hosts can get away with bad sits — sitters who aren’t truthful or transparent with reviews enable them. Then the next unsuspecting sitter walks into problems that the host hasn’t fixed.
If a host operates in good faith, they’ll fix problems whether being told discreetly or in a review. It’s hosts who don’t care whom sitters need to be warned off. And there’s no way that discretion guarantees fixes. For all you know, a previous sitter was already discreet and let you walk into a bad sit.
We only had one bad sit (obviously we are very lucky—well, are we?! I think the vast majority also experience more good ones than bad ones), but I was very clear in my review about points that needed improvement. For example, everything was dirty. We arrived a day before, and we made it very clear that we had to work the next day, but they treated us like we would be working for them. They told us we could work at the kitchen table while they had breakfast and made a lot of noise during our calls.
They surprised us with a lot of new “instructions” that hadn’t been discussed beforehand and also wanted us to bring one of the dogs to their nearly-dead mum (sorry, but it was scary!) every day when scary mum rang the phone once. (No way that we would sit next to the phone all day waiting for a one-ring)
I gave them a very honest, but calm, review, free of anger. However, they were very upset and messaged us multiple times after the sit via WhatsApp, claiming that it was because of us that they were no longer getting “proper applicants” (their words) and that it would have been nicer to discuss these points privately.
Interestingly enough, I recently saw that two sitters after us also mentioned some of the same issues in their reviews.
Sounds like entitled hosts, who definitely should be outted publicly. They’re the most likely to take advantage of sitters (and other humans) and create bad sits.
My worst sit had a dirty kitchen and dining area, with so much grime and years of buildup I would’ve had to use industrial solvent to clean, meanwhile maybe damaging some surfaces in the process.
None of the previous sitters had mentioned such in their reviews. That was an early sit for me and I later realized that I had to look for specific mentions of cleanliness if I prioritized that.
Luckily for me, I don’t cook at all — I order or buy food already prepped, so I was able to get away with minimal cleaning. I also covered their entire dining table to avoid putting my belongings on there. Like I needed a work surface and I didn’t want to put my laptop or my hands or arm on their tacky dining table. Before that, I had wiped it multiple times and couldn’t get the dirty film off. Ick.
They gave me a rave review and said I’d left their home “immaculate.” 
I wouldn’t have been able to do that, considering how they lived.
The funniest part was that they had a flagpole in their garden and told us we needed to raise the Union Jack by 11 a.m. at the latest. When he showed us how to do it, I found it so absurd that I asked if I should hum the anthem while doing it.
I saw a listing where the host said she liked the beds made daily — like why would that matter at all to you if you’re not in the home with a sitter?
At least with those kind of hosts, they’ve given fair warning of how nutty and micromanaging they are.
But what if the homeowners don’t resolve the problems? They might decide not to bother cleaning better, disclosing their pet problems, being honest about the location, etc. Are you OK with the next sitter unwittingly walking into the same problems?