Should a sitter message you that they've arrived?

I have a sitter at my house now, and this person is the very first person who arrived and didn’t say a word. I know the sitter is there based on outdoor security camera activity. When I messaged the sitter with an informational update (I did not ask questions) I did not receive a reply. A friend of mine said “that’s quite rude” but I did not specifically say to the sitter “Tell me when you are there” and I did not ASK the sitter any questions yet. I am also a sitter and I always message the homeowner as soon as I arrive, then gauge how much they want to be updated throughout the sit. I provide updates every couple of days if they’re quiet, and then I provide updates as much as they want if they’re chatty. Thoughts?

Are you cocerned that your camera doesn’t work? LOL :face_with_monocle:

I think if you need the sitter to respond affirmatively or you need specific information, you should clearly state that in your message. I would imagine some sitters take care of their responsibilitles directly, quietly, and self-sufficiently, hoping not to bother the HO.

I am not sure I always affirm my arrival but I do agree to my arrival time, in advance of the sit. Unless something goes awry and I am unable to meet my end of the bargain, I would not think additional commuications are necessary. That is not to say that I don’t send pictures on day 1! :heart_eyes: :smiling_face:

I think you just need to be clear of your expectations ahead of time and don’t fault the sitter for not providing information that you already have…Or for answering an update that did not require a reply, unless you let them know that was the expectation.

If you want a response, ask a question or make it clear you want a reply. :wink:

Talk more, don’t let your friend convince you that there is something wrong/rude with your sitter, unless they (your friend) were an active part of your (Sitter & HO) agreed upon communications.

Good Luck!


It sounds like you’re not fussed, that this only came up because your friend thought it was rude. If it doesn’t bother you (and as you said you had not specifically asked for confirmation or a response), then there is no problem here.

I would never do a blind handover unless it was a sitter I already had a great relationship with, so this is moot for me, but yeah, I do think it’s odd to not notify a HO upon arrival. Most of my sitters have left before I arrive home, and I expect (and make that expectation clear) sitters to let me know when they leave or are about to leave.

I let the pet parent know that I will send a quick text upon arrival and will send my first general update later that evening between 7pm to 9pm local time. I do this so that they know what to expect from me and when. Before, during, and preparation for my departure, I always let the pet parent know what will happen in the near future before they even ask or wonder. This is better for me as I don’t like getting random texts and messages all throughout the week.


@IHeartAnimals Our approach exactly!

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Out of courtesy, we would have let the HO know we had arrived but different people have different standards or opinions. We as people all differ greatly, and you have learnt that some people do not have the same ethics as you.
I would recommend, to save you from feeling this way again, stipulate your request for arrival confirmation when you arrange the sit.


If I wasn’t meeting a home owner in person for a handover I would message to let them know I’d arrived, just for their peace of mind. It would seem odd/unfriendly to me not to do so.


I presume we are talking about blind handover?
In my book, it goes without saying that sitters should message the host as soon as they arrive. One word, ‘Arrived,’ and a pic of pets is enough.

I find total silence (or worse, lack of response to your message) not only rude but also very inconsiderate and, quite frankly, unacceptable.

p.s. I frequently fly to my sittings, and I even message my hosts during the trip so they know everything is going according to plan. I text them “Boarding” when I board the plane, then “Arrived in the country,” and eventually “Arrived” when I reach the location and they have already left.


If I am doing a blind handover, I always text as soon as I arrive. I typically send a picture of the pets along with a message saying I’m in the house. That initial message seems very important to me, I can’t imagine not sending it.


I think I would, unless I knew that they were on a plane, for example.

And maybe not always the very first thing. Maybe I would wait until a question came up. After unpacking, settling in, making coffee, reading the Welcome guide etc.

I would probably not have thought about the possibility that the HO knew that I was already there from cameras.

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@cherylfah when making arrangements to arrive after the hosts have left we say we’ll let you know when we arrive with a WhatsApp message. We’ve never had an owner specifically request this but it’s something that seems like common sense to us .

Although if the owner had pointed out the security cameras would notify them of comings and goings maybe we wouldn’t feel it necessary to do so ?

Before the sits starts we also discuss how often the owner wants updates. The responses have been varied with some wanting daily updates, some say a couple during the week “as and when”would be nice and some saying please don’t bother with updates we know what out dog looks like and we just want to enjoy our holiday but if there are any problems don’t hesitate to get in touch immediately.

I suggest that you send a friendly message to your sitter stating the frequency that you would like to receive updates (and specify if you want photos ) and enjoy the rest of your holiday .

This must be the sitter equivalent of a HO who doesn’t clean out the fridge. Out of sight, out of mind.

Blind handover = message to host

Otherwise how would the host know?

A sitter might be intending to arrive at a certain time, but what if they had an accident enroute.

Very low chance, but for the sake of a quick message. Just letting you know I arrived OK. Its no extra ask!


Suppose I had arranged with the host that I would arrive in the afternoon.

If I had then arrived at lunchtime, I would not see the need to send any message until 6 pm.

In this case host (OP) knows because they are monitoring the external cameras.

Right, but the sitter doesn´t know that. In either case the sitter should message, regardless of anything else it is a polite think to do :smile_cat:


I totally agree it’s polite and common sense to let the homeowner know you’ve arrived and it’s something we always do .

My point is that the sitter will ( or should ) know about this because THS T&Cs state that owners must disclose external camera that will be enabled and monitoring the premises during the sit .

So I just trying to see things from the perspective of a sitter who has been told that their comings and goings can be seen by the owners during the sit - they therefore might not see the need to send a text to notify them of their arrival - as they know that that the owners are able to see this anyway.


Sorry, I saw that but wouldn’t assume a host had the needed camera. And they may not be able to check if overseas.

Easier just to send a message :slight_smile:


If the sitter arrived after you left, I would say it’s not more than normal to expect them to announce that they’ve arrived. I always do so. How are HOs otherwise to know whether their confirmed sitter made it or if the sitter didn’t show up, got stranded etc?

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To me, it’s common sense to let someone know I’d arrived for a blind handoff. Otherwise, how could they tell if I’d been delayed? What if an accident or medical emergency had incapacitated or killed me?

No one has to ask me, because it’s logical. I usually say something like, I’ve arrived and met (the pets). They greeted me happily. (Or they’ve not emerged yet.) If the pets are on hand, I share a photo with my hosts.

I just arrived for a sit yesterday. Once I’d boarded my plane, I let my hosts know. Then because our landing was significantly delayed by turbulence and circling over our airport, I sent an FYI text. Then once I boarded my hour+ airport shuttle during rush hour, I let them know, so they could estimate when I’d arrive at the drop-off point where they’d be to taking me to dinner.

No one had to ask me to do any of that. I did it because it helps eliminate unnecessary doubt for hosts — travel can be full of unexpected delays and it takes little time to be courteous and communicate. To me, that helps build trust as well.