I posted my first TH listing ever a couple of months before my travel dates and confirmed with a sitter shortly afterwards. Unfortunately, they had a medical emergency 3 days before my trip and had to cancel.
3 days before my trip, I set the listing live again and invited a few local sitters to apply.
The 1st sitter, after interviewing, and communicating back and forth for a whole day, declined the invitation after finding out our TV is too small for them. Baffled and frustrated of the time wasted, I still thanked them and moved on.
2 days before the trip… I got back to the 2nd sitter, who could only do 60% of the requested time, saying I could work around their schedule and wanted to video call and go through the logistics.
In the next 10 hours of saying that, a 3rd sitter came up and they could cover the whole time I am out. I decided to go with the 3rd one because I wouldn’t have to ask 2 of my friends and family members to cover the days the 2nd sitter couldn’t cover.
After confirming with the 3rd sitter, I got back to the 2nd sitter right away saying I decided to go with the 3rd one due to better coverage and that I was very appreciative of their time and effort in considering a very last-minute request. I haven’t video called or confirmed with the 2nd sitter by this point.
The 2nd sitter got super angry and sent me a long message about how “disrespectful” and “unacceptable” it was for me to cancel my invitation in that way. They essentially said I wasn’t abiding by TH rules and etiquette.
Has this ever happened to any other pet owners? I understand it could have been frustrating for the sitter because it’s last minute and I probably should have managed their expectations better. However, my understanding is that the sit is only confirmed and finalized when both sides confirm on TH website (with maybe some exceptions). I have had sitters declining even after talking for a while and feeling like they would be a great fit and I don’t go sending them long angry messages.
Regardless, I am still thankful for the community and very happy to have joined.
Ugh. I mean, it’s a little different because you invited them vs them applying, so they may feel like they went out of their way to accommodate your last minute need BUT no, an invitation is not a confirmed sit. If they’d been able to cover the whole time and you declined them that’s one thing, but having to piece together coverage is stressful for people and animals and should be avoided whenever possible. I’d expect them to agree. I don’t know both sides, obviously, but my sense is that in their mind they were trying to help you out, thought it would be enough, then felt rejected when you found someone “better.” It’s not your fault and it’s not really what happened but feelings are funny things. At this point you’ve explained and apologized so I would just let it go.
Hi @catgamer and welcome to the forum.
It can be annoying to get invited to a sit, respond that you are interested and then get a summary decline without any further interaction. this happens a lot and why invite someone and then when they express interest just bin them without further conversation.
What you have done seems to be quite far removed from that. You invited them, they offered to do part of the sit (perhaps trying to be helpful in your time of need) and ultimately you ended up thanking then but told them you were able to get someone to cover the whole period. Any owner or sitter should understand than someone covering 100% of the days is better than the best person only covering half. It sounds like you were quick and polite and communicative about the whole thing and they sound quite rude and obnoxious.
I would suggest you email THS and let them know about their response to you.
If you didn’t confirm the sitter, they didn’t have the sit. Of course you took the sitter who could be available for the entire sit. You were right to cancel the interview as you found a sitter who could do your dates. The sitter who was angry has been doing this too long or not long enough. Put an “unsuitable” label on the email in your THS inbox and archive it.
The proper response would have been: “I’m glad it worked out for you. Please think of me on your next sit.”
I’m a sitter and would have no beef with missing out on a sit under the circumstances you described, because it’s logical for a host to prefer 100 percent coverage and you hadn’t reached a point at which either side had committed yet.
Even when you invite someone to apply for a sit, there are details to work out and the sit might not happen. That’s logical.
It sounds like you dodged a bullet with that sitter, because it’s always better to work with sitters or hosts who are reasonable.
Thank you all, it’s very helpful to hear everyone’s perspectives. I’m glad to know there’s an understanding that if a sit is not confirmed, they don’t have it. Most importantly my pets won’t be too stressed out by a lot of changes while I am gone. The process of last-minute sits is not easy for both owners and sitters alike. Even though it was really hectic and stressful, I am thankful for all the sitters that were willing to consider sitting for me in such short notice, which makes this community so special.