We have confirmed sitters for next year. They asked us on our call if they could have parents and a friend stay with them. We are not comfortable with this. HO that have allow guests stay in their houses what have been your experiences.
@LinRic
We would need more information to comment. How long is the sit? Are they asking for three extra people to stay the whole duration?
I am not a HO but I think you should only accept requests that you feel comfortable with. As a sitter, I might (although I have never done it) ask if a friend could stay with me but I would in no way like to do it if the HO didnāt feel comfortable with that. I think communication is key.
Sit is 50 days. Have asked for a set of parents and a friend to stay. Have no dates yet. It will not be for the length of stay.
I would be interested in knowing if other HO have allowed this and their experiences
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I have not had any sitters have someone come stay with them, although one asked about her partner visiting (and I was fine with that).
On the one hand, I would probably have no problem with family/friend visits during a lengthy stay like this, but it would bother me that the sitter didnāt bring it up prior to the sit being confirmed. Did you have a call prior to accepting the sitter?
You need to do what is comfortable for you. If the sit is not until next year, thereās a really good chance you could get another sitter if you decide to cancel this one. If visitors are a hard no for you, I would recommend either putting it in the listing, or making sure to discuss it during the application process, as itās a reasonable question for a long sit.
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Are they asking on the video call pre confirmation? If so, that is the correct time to ask. If youāve already agreed the sit details then no, not okay. You have to decide. No wrong or right. The caveat would be that 50 days and maybe a weekās visit is entirely possible. #itsyourcall @LinRic
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I think, on an almost two month sit, asking if a friend/relative can stay on the odd night is a reasonable request.
We are full time sitters and probably the biggest drawback is rarely seeing friends and relatives.
Once a year my mother in law comes to visit us from her home in Greece, for that period of time we always ask our home hosts if it is ok if she stays with us - we have no problems finding home hosts that agree.
She visited recently! June 2024 - East Wittering and London ā House and Pet sitters & Airbnb guests
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You decide what you are comfortable with.
I donāt think it is unreasonable to ask to have visitor (-s) for a 50 day sit. I would think it is a shorter visit(?) maybe up to a week or something, depending? If it is for the duration of the sit in my opinion it would be best to mention in the application.
But a call would be the right time to bring it up if not in the application. I would think that if it is not in the application but a question in the call, they would like to hear your opinion before they decide. That could mean that they are open to the sit without visitors, or of course also a possibility that they are not interested if visitors are not allowed.
So just answer according to what you are comfortable with.
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As a sitter, Iāve only ever had someone over for dinner during a sit and that was only twice and only after discussing it with the HO.
I have an upcoming 6 month sit and the HOs told me I was welcome to have visitors if I wanted and theyād even have their dad cat sit if I wanted to go away for a weekend mid-sit to get a break. I will likely have my cousin come for a long weekend to visit as we didnāt get to see each other this year and I may have some friends come down from London for a weekend as they miss having a cat and would enjoy getting out of the city for a weekend in the country sitting around the fire and cooking great food.
I personally would not generally ask the HO to allow me to have overnight guests, but they offered.
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You must do what feels comfortable for you. At the sit I am on, the HOs explained (before I even asked) that they would rather I didnāt have guests as, while they know me, they do not know anyone I may invite over. I thought that was entirely reasonable.
At other sits, Iāve sometimes been encouraged by the HO to have visitors over, or have asked if family can visit for the afternoon, and been told yes. I have never asked if someone can stay overnight.
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It depends how comfortable you feel about it.im a sitter i have asked before a sit or when im on a sit.if its not ok with ho I would completely understand.never been turned down maybe because Iām a mature lady .sometimes I get lonely on a long sit so nice to have a friend stay for a short part of sit.
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Would you have people visit you within a 50 day period @LinRic ? As a HO Iāve left for long periods and my housesitters have had guests stay in that time. I trusted the judgement of my sitters, thats why I chose them. As a sitter, occasionally I have had visitors stay with me while on sits, only long ones. I ask first of course, explain who they are and if needed, give details to the HO. The sit isnāt until next year and I feel the sitter has every right to ask, theyāve given you plenty of notice and I find that respectful. You have every right to refuse but think of it as a sitter is an extension of your family. They are the trusted caregivers of your precious animal family and your material possessions. A little trust goes a long way. Iād want my guests to feel welcomed and honoured. And having family and friends visit on long sits is appropriate in my opinion. If it was a 5 day or two week sit Iād say no. But almost two months, Iād say yes. 
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This is quite a long sit @LinRic and your sitters have asked about potential occasional guests during the video call, which bodes well because they are being transparent and are asking before confirming the sit. If you donāt feel comfortable with this itās fine, thatās your choice. There is no right or wrong here, since weāre all different and this site is to match sitters and hosts who share similar ideals.
Weāve had some generous hosts who have said we can invite guests - even without us asking about this - and have experienced some who have made it clear at the onset that itās not an option.
I wholeheartedly agree with @Colin , so itās lovely - and so much appreciated - when thereās an opportunity for friends or family members to join us on a sit.
Weāve just completed a return sit. We were informed ānothing had changedā since the sit earlier this year, so assumed that extended to the potential visitor situation - our adult son stayed for a couple of nights last time (approved by the pet parents) and theyāve had another sitter in the interim period - but when we asked if an old friend and her husband could visit one weekend during this 5 week sit, response was that theyād prefer we didnāt have guests this time. We felt it was a real shame and were sad about it, but of course we respected their wishes and had no visitors. In retrospect, we should have asked about this before confirming.
We did a wonderful return sit in France this summer and our hosts were happy for our daughter and 2 grandchildren to fly out to join us for a week. What a treat that was for us, and their pet enjoyed all the extra attention (with lots of update pics and videos sent to the pet parents, so they could see the happy results of their generosity).
On leaving another sit in France this year - again, fabulous - we were invited to sit again next year and told that our family members would be welcome to join us. I suspect this is because, on arriving the day before the pet parentās departure and sharing a meal together, and again on the day they returned, we all talked about family, shared stories and we showed them photos etc.
That kind of warmth and generosity is overwhelming, isnāt it?
Weāre about to commence a 3 month sit, and feel it would just be too long a time not to see any of our friends or family, so did ask during the video chat if occasional guests would be permitted - just as the sitter in this case has done. Response was that they were glad weād asked and are happy for us to have guests or visitors. They trust us to be responsible about this and we will be.
I wouldnāt urge any pet parent to agree to visitor or guest requests if they donāt feel immediately okay with the proposal. If youāre not going to feel relaxed about the situation, it will both ruin your holiday and put undue strain on the sitter. Just be honest - with yourself and with the sitter - and refuse this time around. Maybe, after youāve had a few good sit experiences, you may feel differently, but donāt stress or feel compelled to agree something which doesnāt sit well with you.
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If you are not comfortable, say, āNo.ā Your home. Your rules. And shame on the sitter for even asking for parents AND a friend !?!
Thatās a bit harsh, @toreishi. The sitter was only asking in a pre-confirmation chat if it were possible, not stating it as happening after confirmation or sit start date.
One of my questions to potential HOs in our pre confirmation chat is if it might be possible, and I am happy for them to say no - although everyone so far has been fine with it.
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come on, its a 50 day sit, I donāt see the problem here. 
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I think it is quite alright to ask questions pre-sit.
Iāve seen on forum over time that some think asking a question is being entitled, demanding and such. In my opinion things like this should be discussed pre-sit, and could also be part of the sitters vetting-process.
I also agree that one should feel free to say both yes or no to such questions.
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I agree but i do think that if the sitter knows that they are going to ask for overnight visitors in the chat that they should have already mentioned it in the application so that the HO can consider in advance.
If i know that I want to be joined i will write
I normally sit alone but on this occasion i would like a friend to join me for a few days.
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Let me add that last year we had someone sit for 45 days. He was not a THS member. Everything was going fabulous till the fam member (we agreed to it before hand) showed up and he forgot the rules. The fm drove our car which we did not agree too. One day they left workers at our home, with the gate open, set the alarm and left our dog for 10 hours (dog was not supposed to be alone for more than 4 hours). This activity set the alarm off and my dog panicked from the alarm noise and damaged a door. We did not find this out till after the fact. So you can see our apprehension.
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but these people are not the old sitters so have an honest converation and lay out your concerns to them. Find a mutually happy balance and enjoy the experience. #itmightsurpriseyou
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