This has not been common for us but we also are typically driving to our sits - we are in the U.S. and have driven as far as 1400 miles for sits, but that’s part of the fun for us.
Hopefully the sitter’s application mentioned these expectations. It does seem a lot more common if the sitter is flying or taking transit to get to you. Keep in mind, they are incurring the cost of that transport so needing a ride from the airport or transit location seems a small ask.
As for expecting a meal, I think that’s a bit much. We would never expect this even if we are coming in the night before the stay. In fact, some sitters would prefer not to.
Maybe think of this as an opportunity to test out this routine and see if you enjoy it.
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I would say if one get guests arriving the day before - for me it is very odd not to offer a meal? I would think it was within at least my norm of hospitality? I do think I would have offered a prepared meal. Maybe a small warm meal (lasagna was suggested over 
) but at least sandwich/ Tea or what the custom is locally?
For me it would be very awkvard to first welcome my guests and then let them sit «without wet or dry» as we say here. Maybe on the edge of the bed in the guestroom - waiting for me to leave the next morning ? 
I see on forum that some sitters have experienced hosts eating and drinking in front of them without offering. For me that is rude, I’ll have to say.
The very least for me would be «help yourself to an evening meal, there’s plenty in the fridge» if for instance I for some reason am unable to take part (packing, go to bed early or whatever).
What do you do @Kbco if you arrive the night before and don’t eat with the host?
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Agree it would be awkward to not offer something or assist with them finding something. They want to arrive around 4pm the day prior, we leave around 1pm the following day. Thinking through how that could be 3 meals (dinner, breakfast, lunch) is a lot. I think we’ll offer for dinner the night before and help them seek out options for a grocery store/market nearby to get things for themselves the following day.
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I had a recent sit like you described, including dinner, breakfast and lunch. My hosts took me out to dinner on my arrival. Breakfast was breakfast sandwiches, toast or cereal — stuff your guests can help themselves to. Lunch was cold cuts and such, so everyone made their own sandwiches. And then my hosts left for the airport after lunch.
In other cases, my hosts told me to help myself to what was in their well-stocked fridge and pantry for breakfast, but I instead ordered in via DoorDash. I even ordered extra and treated them, since they’d treated me to dinner the night before.
To me, it’s not really about the food specifically — it’s about making guests feel welcome.
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We live in Oregon and have done about 30 dog-sits in California, some on THS and some not. We always have our car.
We have NEVER spent the night before at the Owner’s home. It has never even been discussed at all. But, we almost always go over to the Owner’s home at some point before the dog-sit and meet them, the pets, get a tour, etc.
Perhaps this time, you did not have a bunch of great applicants to take care of your cat, but I would seek out Sitters who seem to be a bit more resourced, in general.
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It probably depends on the type of sit and location. I have not done this with any sits I hosted with the exception that we took a sitter out to dinner a few nights before the sit after she came to pick up the keys. (She was staying at a hotel by her choice. She was supposed to come with her partner but he couldn’t at the last minute and we were so grateful that she hadn’t cancelled.) I’ve never picked up a sitter at the airport. I have given good masss transit directions.
As a sitter, I’ve never had that offer. Once I came the night before because the homeowners were leaving early in the morning, but we didn’t have dinner together. These are cat sits so there is much less reason to hang out. I have an upcoming dog sit in another country where we will have dinner with the homeowners. They will also pick us up at their regional airport.
It sounds like the sitter might have said this to you more like an order. To me it’s more of a discussion: When does it make sense for the sitter to get there so that there’s enough time to show them the routine? How will they get to your home from the airport?
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I only very rarely don’t arrive the night before and spend the night at the home. If I do, it’s for a very short sit or for a HO I’ve sat for before. Arriving the day before is useful for everyone but especially the pet who has time to get familiar with me while his people are still around. Occasionally it’s been a bit awkward, but usually it’s very nice and we have a good time. I also think it’s reasonable to expect a pick-up from a public transport stop, especially if they’re not from the area.
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As people have indicated, this can be pretty normal. I both sit and have sitters - I clarify with sitters in the house listing what my preference is for their staying the previous evening (we are in a major city and I’ve never been asked, nor offered, to pick up, we’re close to transport). Normally I’m flexible. I really have enjoyed having dinner with people the previous evening, but prior to a big trip with flying I tend to get nervous so I prefer that people don’t stay. Sitters visit a day or more before the sit, we give the walk around and keys, they meet the cat, and then they can arrive when they like. As long as all this is clear from the start / over the pre-call, always seems to work pretty well. Hope the sitter works out!
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@MichiganJules The original concept behind THS and crucial piece of this exchange community was to treat each other like friends or family members who were helping each other out. But as the platform has grown, it has often become less personal and more transactional. With travel delays being common, it is often a benefit to have the sitter arrive the afternoon before you leave, if possible. If this sitter was your friend, would you pick them up at the transit center (if possible) provide them a simple meal upon arrival, let them stay the night and maybe offer some simple “help yourself” breakfast items? I am sure you could excuse yourself after dinner to attend to packing and also let them know that you have to work from home the next morning, so they will know to give you space. A friend would certainly understand your needs too. I hope it goes well.
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I have found this to be the norm, especially if the owners are leaving in the morning. I totally agree with @Southernsitter that it used to be friendlier and more personal but sadly as the platform has grown it is becoming less so and more of a business arrangement despite the sitter not being paid for their services.
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As a sitter I would never ask these things of the home owner. If they offered them and wanted me to stay to get to know them and their pets the day before, I certainly would and I have done that. Do what your comfortable with. I have come the day before for my own reasons, as I live far from an airport so I dont like to fly early and I always research how I would get to their home, never expecting the home owner to pick me up, but once again, they have, but that has been their choice, It is always appreciated.
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This is a good point. I also think the more sits you do (or host sitters) the more comfortable you are with this concept. We were really awkward and nervous when we first started, but now after many months of housesitting we are more open and comfortable with this concept
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As currently being the HS, I completely understand where you’re coming from.
It might be common but it’s against the terms and conditions, specifically 5.2.13, to request nightly overlaps before/after the sit, whether you’re the housesitter or homeowner.
Adding extra days beyond the sit through the platform might not only be a breach but also problematic in terms of insurance if the sit get’s canceled and a claim for reimbursement is filed.
If anyone requests this, it’s against the terms they agreed to when registering.
It should -at the very least - be clearly highlighted in the profile or listing, cause it puts the other party in an uncomfortable position.
I never engage-or agree to do overlaps and manage to arrive one or two hours early or meet for a coffee beforehand, whether for local or international sits. Are confident others are capable of doing the same.
What’s next—bottle service, cigars, and lobsters for dinner?
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I’m new to the forum- and impressed with how much engagement there is! I really appreciate that.
I do understand the core values of this platform, that it was intended to be a community-sharing-pet-loving group. We do honor that; we strive to keep our home in excellent clean condition with resources readily available to make sitters comfortable and have a detailed welcome guide with everything they might need including lots of recommendations.
I was surprised at the expectation we provide these additional aspects (night before, meals, transportation), because in honoring the initial foundation of the platform, it is a two-way street. We are entrusting the sitter with the wellbeing of our beloved pet, while also giving them a free place to stay. Airbnbs are quite pricey here ($400/night minimum for a 1 bedroom)! The free lodging aspect I do see as our gift; and the sitters gift is caring for the animal.
I am aware I have my own personal preferences around sharing space with in essence, a stranger, which influenced the reaction and the question. I will take the advice to heart and consider how we want to move forward with future sits. Including what we are most comfortable with, how to communicate this clearly, and how to be welcoming and inclusive of sitters. Thank you,
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It really depends on the situation. If you are leaving early and expect an in person handover, it would be fair to offer accommodating your sitter the night before (providing you have a spare room). This way you can avoid any hiccups in arrival times, and ensure a smooth, convenient handover for both parties.
If you are in a more remote location and your home is difficult to get to, offering to pick up your sitters from the nearest arrival point is a reasonable request. If it is a simple journey in a well connected area with public transport and Ubers around, picking them up would be a wonderful bonus, but should in no way be expected.
Especially if your pet is a dog/s (requires many walks, lots of attention, you expect the sitter not to leave them for long), offering your sitter a hand in their arrival and departure for the extremely helpful and important service they are providing you isn’t too much to ask and shows gratitude and appreciation.
If you are flexible in when your sitter can arrive, you have already done a pre-meet or don’t require an in person handover, and your home is in a well connected area, it is not reasonable for you sitter to have these expectations.
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The sit where we went the night before they left was included in the sit dates.
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@ChristineB Many of them are, especially the longer ones. I have yet to experience a weekend sit where they add it.
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@MichiganJules I completely agree with you, and the day before a longer trip can be stressful enough as it is. If the house sitter also has dietary preferences etc, those extra days could easily turn into you feeling like you’re providing a Bed & Breakfast—especially since the actual sit hasn’t even started yet.
This is a friendly exchange of services between private individuals, nothing more.
Until THS incorporates a feature to address this, I would suggest including a time window in your listing that specifies your preferred arrival and departure times.
This would be extremely helpful for all parties if HOs chose to do that, particularly for international sits.
It would be easy for THS to eventually implement such features, as other platforms already include this as an essential part of their service.
I agree with a comment made earlier—it’s a huge red flag if one party only wishes to communicate outside of the app.
It’s also worth keeping in mind that some listings have no pets at all - would highly suspect that in those cases, extra days, dinner, and transportation are expected.
Hope everything goes well with you trip🍀
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The only sits where I’ve been offered accommodation the night before included that in the dates AND had a room avaiable - for my upcoming sit I’ll be in a granny annexe, in my most recent sit I was in a b&b wing. I appreciated being offered this, but I would not consider asking.
I’ve also been collected from the train station, which was really thoughtful, but i had investigated other options too because i didn’t see this as the responsibility of the HO.
As for meals, i have allergies, which would scare many, so I usually make my own arrangements.
A sitter asking for all of this is stretching the ethos of THS, i feel.
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@MichiganJules This thread is so long I haven’t read all the posts but our experience is that we are frequently invited to arrive the night before for handover (especially on international sits or if the host is departing early) and this is usually accompanied by a direct invitation for dinner at home or out.
If dinner is not mentioned we always clarify that too. We would never outright ask to be picked up/fed/invited to stay. However if a host asked us to arrive very early in the morning because they depart early we usually say that’s not practical for us- especially if there is a long drive. This has led to spontaneous invitations to come the night before. Sometimes a newer host has not considered that option before.
If we are doing back to back sits we do often flow from one sit to the next with a short daytime handover.
Every sit is unique and it depends on the travel timings and commitments of both parties. Its a great opportunity to get to know those ‘strangers’ coming to stay in your home and to see them interact with your pets. But it certainly not everyones preference to overlap too much!
Communication is key- And these type of logistics should be talked through before confirming the sit so everyone is clear on expectations.
We actually often enjoy the overlaps and on longer sits, especially international we often stay the last night too and reciprocate a welcome home meal.
If this sitter has requested all this of you AFTER having confirmed the sit then that’s not sensitive at all and puts you on the spot. If they’ve asked during the video call or application its down to you whether you would feel comfortable or willing to offer.
Ultimately you must do what makes you feel the most comfortable. Any kind or arrangement goes- whatever works for you and your sitters.
Edit I just read your latest comment talking about airbnb costs. I would never compare sitting with airbnb. As a sitter I do not feel like I’m on holiday in a vacation rental. I have the full responsibility of your home, (maybe garden) and pets, to keep everyone safe & happy, walk the dogs etc and sending frequent (often daily) reports to you and to return your home beautifully clean to you. Its very different from a carefree holiday in a rental unit & The sitter needs to stay in your home to be able to offer an in-home pet sitting service!
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