My next sit has raised a few red flags. The more I feel into it, the more my gut tells me no.
I have already done a video call and an in-person meeting/tour that took me about half a day’s worth of travel. The sit is about a month away.
Here are the red flags:
Two previous sitters, only one of which is included in the reviews section (on the app). They didn’t leave a review and neither did HO. Looking at sitter’s past reviews, most of them are 4 or 5-star, but the 2 most recent are very low rated. I was told they stayed about half a year but the review only shows 3 months. There was apparently a big argument they got into regarding boundaries and damage. I don’t know who was really at fault.
Condescending/reactive tone of voice in messages from HO (already).
Dogs are very anxious, can bolt, bark a lot, and I am expected to maintain a huge property all on my own. I have done that before but this feels more like a paid gig or a gig for a couple. I work remotely and am expected to spend most of my time outside observing the dogs – this I did not know until I went in-person.
They were clearly concerned about my lack of car and were struggling to find a back-up plan in case of emergency.
There would be two housesits in one and they would be returning in-between. This I do not think is covered by THS and they have not updated the listing or made a new one with the new dates.
I don’t expect my cancellation to go well with the HOs but it is feeling like I need to now rather than later. I have C-PTSD, so for those of you who are familiar, a bad gut feeling that only gets bigger normally means run in the opposite direction.
I’ll also add that I was invited to the sit rather than applied.
Has anybody had a sit like this? How long were you there for? Did it go well in the end? What would you advise to do/not to do?
You know the answer; of course those are red flags. Even one of them would be reason enough. Do you want your PTSD to get worse? Don’t do the sit; life is too short to be made miserable.
@goldensungirl …
I think that you already know the answer , trust your gut ….
First of all it’s great that you did a meet up before starting the sit and found all this out
What would be the point of travelling half a day for a pre-visit and then not acting on what you have learn from the visit ?
No one can force you to do this sit .
We all sit voluntarily.
In addition (based on what you have said )these owners have broken at least 3 of the THS terms of service.
If the sit responsibilities have not been accurately represented in the listing then you have a valid reason to withdraw from it
( 5.2.7. ensure that the details of your Home Listing are accurate and up to date)
If the dogs behavior has not been accurately described in the listing again another valid reason to withdraw.
(5.2.5. notify a Sitter of any special requirements or behaviours relating to your pet(s) in your Home Listing and when you communicate with any Sitter and during the Handover )
Third parties are not permitted ( host returning mid sit ) so again a valid reason to withdraw from the sit .
(5.2.13. ensure your home is vacated for a Sitter throughout the duration of the Sit )
You can back out of this sit for these valid reasons either this by telling the owners directly OR by contacting THS.
Take a screenshot of the listing including the responsibilities section - ( owners can change these at any time )
To contact THS a you can use live chat ( ask to speak to a human ) or use the Urgent Support Phone Line which is a 24/7 phone number .
If you decide to go with your gut , it’s important that this sit is cancelled officially ( either by THS or owners ) . Then the host can not leave you a negative review and you can apply for other sits for those dates .
Please report back to the forum on how it works out .
You ask because you know, is the feeling I get. As Silversitters and others say - each of your numbers are valid reasons to cancel.
If it is like this now - how will it be during sit? What will your review be? And - will you be kicking yourself not going with your gut?
I would just say that «thinking it trough this will be more than I can handle. Please cancel so you can find a suitable sitter - I can also ask member service to cancel.»
This is what videocalls and meetups are for, as said over. Getting the picture.
You don’t mention how many sits you’ve done before, but I’m guessing you’ve done others by what you’ve raised as red flags.
So that said, remember one thing, pet sitting is supposed to be fun! You should be excited about spending time in a new place with pets.
I think you know you’ve took on too much anyway, and you’re regretting saying yes. We sit as a couple so have sat in larger homes/land and with more pets, but I can’t imagine doing some of our sits if I were single, no way!
It’s pretty obvious you now regret saying yes. Please don’t ignore the red flags. Your intuition is always right.
Intuition doesn’t tell you what you want to hear; It tells you what you need to hear
Pet sitting should be about to enjoy the time with pets, in a place that feels like home, while home owners enjoy their time at peace knowing that their pets are happy in safe hands at home. Win-Win-Win
If you feel that this won’t be the case…
You know what to do
The right thing
It doesn’t matter what anyone would say on the forum. If they say you are being logical or illogical, overreacting or not, it all comes down to how you feel. The feeling you have is not a way to go into a sit. You want to feel good about it and looking forward to the new adventure. Always listen to your gut. Don’t try to analyze your feelings. If you are thinking, well I have such and such so maybe I should think more about this. We all have something, sitters and PP, diagnosed or not diagnosed so we all have to listen to our gut. What a good sit would be for me may be not what someone else would want and vice versa. Cancel now to give them as much time as possible to find someone. Don’t let them make you feel bad about it. Go find something you feel good about.
It’s a shame you didn’t back out when you did the in-person tour, although maybe you’d confirmed at that stage. It’s always a good idea to check reviews of past sitters and owners before even applying for a sit you do get a good feel about the sit.
I think you know the answer and I would always go with my gut. Condescending tone isn’t nice as sounds like the owner is entitled and treating you more like a servant and, as you say, it should be a paid gig. It certainly doesn’t sound like a fair exchange. I wouldn’t like them returning in the middle of the sit and can imagine there might be another huge argument as they’ll likely find something wrong.
The fact that you were invited to do the sit would make me feel less concerned about backing out, which YOU MUST DO IMMEDIATELY!
As someone else has said “run for the hills”. These owners don’t deserve you.
I would not go forward with this sit for many reasons but the topmost are 1) condecending attitude and 2) an expectation for you to spend most of your time outside observing the dogs (What the heck !?!).
Plus ,this may be on you or on the HO, but I would never spend half a day travelling to meet potential HO’s.
Better to cancel now than to be strapped with issues while you’re there.
I agree. But do the cancel thru TH admin so that the homeowner also cancels and can’t leave a bad review. I cancelled a sit the day before it was due to start after realizing they didn’t represent it accurately. The homeowner was furious but not my problem. I contacted TH admin and they made sure it was cancelled on both sides. I’ve had lots of HO cancel on me so it works both ways. Don’t be a doormat. This isn’t your livelihood.
I contacted THS first and they told me I needed to contact the HO first. Didn’t help much. HO took it well, but didn’t think I gave enough notice. I gave a month! Oh well.
Felt sooo much better after I cancelled. Like a weight was lifted. Definitely made the right decision, and now I know to cancel before the sit is even confirmed with all these red flags I’m now very aware of. Trusting myself.
They have reposted the listing with the updated dates and I got an invite for this after the cancellation – don’t know if that was an accident or not, but strange whether it was THS or the HO. I think they are still planning on returning home in the ‘in between’ period.
