This is our first time listing our home as Home Owners on TrustedHousesitters, so we’re still learning how things usually work and would really appreciate some guidance from more experienced members.
We live in a quiet residential area where having a car is helpful (the closest grocery store is about a 4-minute drive). We’ve been clear about this in our listing.
We recently connected with a sitter we really liked and had a good video call. During the conversation, some transportation-related questions came up:
Whether we could lend our car (we said no)
Whether we could help with transportation costs (we offered an amount for covering 3-4 occasional short trips)
Later, whether we could pick her up from another city about 30 minutes away, which we’re not able to do on our departure day
We’ve tried to be helpful and flexible, but since this is our first sit, we’re unsure where to draw the line and what’s considered normal or expected within the TrustedHousesitters community.
My question for the group:
Is it common for sitters to ask for transportation help (car use, cash, pickups), or is it generally expected that sitters are fully self-sufficient in that regard if the listing mentions a car is helpful?
We want to make sure we’re being fair and reasonable, while also setting the right expectations for a smooth and positive sit.
Thanks in advance for any advice or experiences you can share!
Sitters are responsible for their own transportation. Some hosts offer pickups and loan cars to be helpful, but a sitter asking as you described is pushy. I would avoid such a sitter. I say that as a sitter.
And asking you to provide or share transportation costs could violate terms, because sitters aren’t supposed to ask for money. Plus, if this sitter can’t provide for themselves, they might end up exploiting you otherwise once they’re in your home.
As first-time homeowners, it’s normal to still be finding where your boundaries sit — and being clear about them upfront is what usually leads to the smoothest, most comfortable sits for everyone.
In general, sitters are expected to arrange their own transportation, particularly when a listing clearly notes that a car is helpful and that car use isn’t offered. Any lifts, car use, or help with costs are usually offered by homeowners as a courtesy, rather than being an expectation.
If questions or requests raised during a video chat leave you feeling a bit uneasy, that’s useful information in itself. It’s okay to pause, reflect, and decide whether the fit feels right for you.
It’s also reasonable to say no to anything that doesn’t work for you, especially around departure days. Clear expectations on both sides tend to make for the best sits.
You may have tried to be helpful and flexible but that’s not how you came across.
We let sitters use our car, and we will pick up and drop off as needed. There’s always a way to make it work, even if they have to arrive a bit earlier than they originally intended so the host can make their flight.
There would be no need to discuss transportation costs if you let them use your car.
What it comes down to is how desirable is your sit and do you have any problems getting enough sitter applicants? If yes, you’ll need to be more flexible. If no, then you needn’t be concerned about being so flexible. You’ll find another sitter who doesn’t need all of those things.
We have a high demand listing and no trouble getting sitter applicants. But we allow use of our car and we go the extra mile to pick up/drop off because we care about the people who will be caring for our most valuable possessions.
Hi @nande. I am a sitter and have completed 30 five star sits. My opinion is that this sitter is making inappropriate requests and that your responses have been fine. The sitter may be testing the limits because your are a first timer.
Glad you came to the forum.
You may want to check out the
‘Sitter has run out of money thread’
@nande We have been sitters and homeowners for four years now.
We would pass on this sitter immediately. Asking for compensation, etc. is, in our minds, out of line. And as another poster wrote, that is just the tip of the iceberg in what they’ll expect from you.
Remember that you do not have to choose the first sitter(s) that apply. We tend to be patient and wait for a suitable sitter to apply. Once, we declined seven applications before we found a match with the eighth applicant.
This does not sound like a sitter you would want to trust with your home or pets. Can’t read your listing or did and decided to push for more than you were wiling to offer. If they’re unable to afford the basics of getting to you then even the slightest bump in their plans will lead them to cancel or need more money.
Welcome! I would be curious to know if this sitter is also new or had other reviews, and if the latter, how were they rated on self-sufficiency? Yes, owners sometimes lend cars and offer to pick up / drop off, but, that is an individual choice and – also as a sitter – I’m not sure I’d pick this person either. Do you have other applicants? Did you already confirm them for the sit?
Sitters are unposed to pay their own transportation costs. If you have it in your listing, car needed, then they shouldn’t ask for a car. I have it in my listing a car is required. They either probably didn’t read it thoroughly or was hoping you would change your mind.
in one of our sits, we approached a sitter who lives out of town to sit for our pet. She had sat for us previously. We offered to pick her up at the airport and return her there. All of our other sits, the sitter had a car.
Ah I’m probably feeling cranky, but sitters saying “gimme gimme gimme” really gives me the pip. If you can’t afford to get there or get around on your own dollar don’t apply. Set your boundaries @nande and don’t feel bad about it. However Steve has good points about your level of desirability so yeah, off my soapbox now
Welcome to the forum @nande. Sitters are not allowed to ask for money. It is upon them to organise their own transportation, food etc. You have already clarified that there will be no car available for her use and that you are unable to pick her up. Suggestion: often sitters are invited to arrive the afternoon/evening before to allow for a smooth handover, especially where members are new. Is your sitter new like you or does she have THS reviews, not just references?
Can I suggest, in light of the situation with THS at present, that you read the Terms of Service thoroughly to ensure you understand what you have agreed to (and that of the sitter) when you joined.
You’re not being unfair or unreasonable. You clearly laid out your needs & expectations for the sit, & the situation sitters will be in.
Although they probably shouldn’t have applied since you were clear in your listing on the transportation requirements, it’s also OK for sitters to ask if there’s any flexibility re:transportation, if everything else seems like a great match. They may also have initially assumed they could rent a car, then checked and found the cost prohibitive — this happened to me once for a rather remote sit. I told the PO of my concern about paying so much for a car that would just sit in the driveway for 2 weeks, and that I thought I might (regrettably) have to withdraw my application. They immediately responded that they’d just put me on their insurance and let me use theirs. Problem solved, we’re all happy it worked out.
Ultimately, it’s up to you to decide what works for you. If you connected so well with this Sitter, maybe it’s worth it to go out of your way — but if it just won’t work, it’s also OK to say you’d love to have them in the future when the requirements align better for both of you. You can even ask them if they’d be OK with being a backup while you interview other sitters. (Some won’t, some might be OK with that if they really want to sit for you or travel to the area.)
And as an aside: I think @WeRPAWsome answered your question really eloquently, in every respect; I just wanted to add my experience for context, in case it might apply here.
All sits are different. Whatever you decide, just make sure you’re comfortable.
Your response is quite inappropriate and rude to a new owner who is here seeking advice. It is entirely up to owners whether they wish to offer their car.
Wow ! A lot of audacity on the part of that sitter !
Sure, they have every right to make those requests and you have every right to say, “No”.
Their requests while, again, fair, are not the norm (especially requesting transportation cost coverage). Your denials are understandable and your drawing a line where YOU want to draw a line is 100% correct.
Your home.
Your animals.
Your sit.
Your rules.
Sure, some may not like them and that is why there are many people here each with different needs, “requests,” and degrees of flexibility.
The bottom line on fair and reasonable is being clear on offerings/requirements and expectations every step of the way and communicating these to your potential sitter.
Obviously I only know what you’ve written here but there is something of a yellow flag, something concerning about their requests. While I can’t tell you what to do, I, as a homeowner dealing with these requests would look to other applicants.
I hope that your first sit is a great one and that your sitters are responsible, caring and integrous.
Welcome! You’ll discover what works best for you and your particular situation, and the key is to be clear about those choices in your listing. As the homeowner, you get to decide what you’re comfortable with regarding your home, animals, and belongings, and sitters can then decide if it’s a good fit for them.
For me, I no longer offer the use of my car. It’s a long story, but I learned that it can be a bit of a slippery slope, and after one experience I realized it wasn’t something I wanted to continue. I’m always happy, though, to pick sitters up from the airport, which is only about fifteen minutes away.
A car isn’t essential where I live — grocery stores and public transit are within easy walking distance — though it can certainly be nice to have one for beach outings and exploring the area. I do have a few trusted repeat sitters who I would loan my car to, but that comfort level came with time and experience.
I’m very upfront in my listing that a car isn’t provided, so most sitters either drive here or rent a car if they’re flying in. I continue to receive plenty of applications, so being clear about this hasn’t limited my options at all.
When a sitter is flying in, I usually ask them to arrive the day before the sit begins. It makes for a relaxed, unhurried introduction to my home and animals and also helps reduce stress if there are any travel delays.
@Smiley yes 100% correct . And what people need to understand also is the insurance implications in other countries. I personally haven’t had an issue in the UK with homeowners putting me on their policy but I DO know that it can be very difficult and at times not possible, to add an additional driver to a policy, particularly one that isn’t a citizen of the country. The comments on car use “from certain people” are completely inappropriate and unknowledgeable. Different countries, different rules. Also, absolutely no homeowner should feel pressured or expected to loan their car, one of the biggest and most important purchases some people make in their lifetime. I only lend to friends and family, not sure in a large city I would be open to lending to a stranger.
@nande to me , this sitter is a and I would definitely wait for a far more suitable sitter with far less unrealistic expectations and requests, there’s many of them out there. Best of luck going forward
