How do you reassure a nervous host using a sitter for the first time?

[Jenny]

Hello everyone!

As an experienced sitter, what do you do to reassure a nervous first-time host and help build trust early on?

If you need a little inspo, think about:

• What you cover during your first video call

• The kind of updates you offer during the sit (and how often)

• What do you do if a pet is shy, anxious, or slow to warm up

• How you handle questions from a host who may need extra reassurance

• Anything else you do that helps first-time hosts feel more at ease before they leave

If you have any tried-and-tested tips that really worked for you, please add them in the replies!

Thank you!

Jenny

[Smiley]

If I’ve been near first time hosts I have. visited them and answered any questions they had. On each occasion they said they felt reassured.

[SeniorSitter1]

I had one newbie only. I always ask about pictures. She said one a day. The day she left early am she texted me at 3pm to see how things were going and said, don’t forget about sending a picture. I thought, oh boy she is really nervous leaving her pet with someone. Never had before with even with friends or relatives. I usually send pics at end of day. With her I started to send before noon. I usually write a few sentences with it. With her there were detailed paragraphs. I sent videos as well. On day 5 she said I’m glad I picked you as I like the stories you send with the pics and it makes me not miss (insert pet name) as much. It was like a new mom leaving her baby for the first time.

[ChiaGrowth]

I’m looking forward to the “as a nervous host, what are your best tips on how not to make it the sitters problem”-post.

[august]

I’ve been doing quite a bit of sitting for first-time hosts lately. And quite frankly, I don’t remember any of them being nervous. Curious? Very. Excited? Yes. But nervous? Nah.

Of course, I showered them with all the info they could need… and then some. They didn’t need any reassurance. All they wanted was to have some questions answered. The questions they asked were mostly practical, regarding the steps for securing a sitter.

I truly hope they are all excellent hosts now. I enjoyed teaching them, showing them the ropes, and explaining how it all works

[Maggie8K]

If someone were extra nervous, I might just avoid them, because there are plenty of sits with hosts who aren’t extra nervous/who need handholding.

What I routinely do is already aimed at prospective hosts trusting me and, if that’s not enough, oh, well.

• I have dozens of five-star reviews that specify how well I take car of pets and homes, without any dings.

• I’m a sitter based in the U.S., so have been background checked.

• My sitter profile anticipates hosts’ questions and concerns, as someone who’s owned homes over decades and has taken great care of my own pet. I also note that I’m a nonsmoking sitter who sits solo as a telecommuter. Plus, I mention that I’m an introvert who loves quiet time with pets. And if they want to consider loaning their car, I’ve road tripped safely over decades, including driving my RV cross country and abroad.

• When applying, I include my Airbnb link (which also mentions how well I take care of such homes) and my Linkedin profile (which has my full name and many years of professional experience and heavy responsibilities).

• I noted that I’m happy to video chat to see whether we have a mutual fit. I also note that I’m consistently available on multiple platforms and apps, and do regular updates. My reviews all back that up. And I share my email and phone number when we coordinate video chatting.

Any new sitter has less track record/credibility on THS than experienced sitters like me, so we can be selective about hosts, because great sitters get repeat invitations, referrals for other sits, as well as invites for unsolicited sits. It would help new(ish) hosts to take all of that into consideration.

And personally, I’ve sat for a number of new(er) THS hosts who’ve been trusting and calm, not particularly nervous. I know they’re out there, so why bother with extra nervous hosts. Some people are just extra anxious or needy, but it’s not necessarily any sitter’s obligation to cater to them.

[WeRPAWsome]

As sitters, we’re often not just caring for pets, but helping a first-time host feel safe enough to leave their home and much-loved animals. A few things that have worked well for us:

On the first video call, we slow things down. We let hosts talk us through their pets’ routines in their own words, ask what normal looks like for them, and invite any “this might sound silly but…” questions. That space alone can be very reassuring.

We’re upfront about communication. Before the sit starts, we agree what kind of updates they’d like — daily, every second day, photos, short notes — and we stick to it. Knowing when they’ll hear from us often matters more than the length of the message.

With shy or anxious pets, we reassure hosts that we follow the pet’s lead. No forcing affection, no expectations — just consistency, calm voices, and routine. We also let hosts know we’ll tell them honestly how things are going, not just the highlights.

If a host needs extra reassurance, we welcome questions rather than seeing them as a problem. We’d much rather answer something twice than have them worrying while they’re away.

Before they leave, we often send a simple message saying we’re looking forward to the sit and will take good care of everything. It sounds small, but it helps mark the handover and settle nerves.

Trust builds quickly when hosts feel heard, kept in the loop, and confident their pets are being cared for in the way that matters to them.

[Candide]

I’m a nervous and anxious owner I never hide it during a video chat.

In my listing, i ask for daily pics and hope to receive news, a simple picture is enough, a short “ hello, everything is ok” is enough, i don’t expect a novel.

If I don’t receive news, then I begin to panic… and hesitate to show it. Afraid to bother the sitter…

But I generally send a message, ask if everything is OK, when silence sounds too heavy. I don’t give a damn if I sound anxious. I am for sure ! It spoils my holiday…

I could ask a neighbour to check he has seen my pets in the garden, i fon’t want to act as spying the sitter

Sending a pic once a day is not that hard, is it ?

If my pet has become ill, while we are away, i want to be warned. I would come back if our pet may die. I need of course to know the pet has become ill, has been shown to our vet. Yes I’m anxious, as i lost a pet during a sit…

I would never ask the sitters to leave, I would go to friend’s but I want to be near my pet, to take him in charge if he is close to cross the rainbow bridge.

If sitters can’t understand that, then for sure I prefer they don’t aapply.

Sitters who have or had pets usually understand.

I don’t feel ashamed to sound very anxious even if I had nearly welcomed 30 sitters via 2 different platforms. Each new sitter may follow, or not, my requirements. I never know in advance. I have to trust.

I feel totally trusty when a sitter comes for a 2nd or 3rd time ( my anxiety has not discouraged them to come back).

Yes leaving a pet is like leaving a child in strangers’ hands.

[Newpetlover]

You can create a topic if you like. I won’t be able to post because I am a sitter and probably there are not a lot of nervous HOs on the forum interested in contributing but, still, it might be worth asking.

Regarding the topic @Jenny has started, I think it is an interesting question. As a sitter, I am really grateful to my first host, not only for trusting me and giving me the opportunity to get started in spite of there being more applicants, but also because she put my mind at rest by her easygoing and flexible attitude. So I am more than happy to return the favour and help new hosts.

I think what helps them most is to show that I am trustworthy, experienced and flexible.

It’s comforting for them to know that when they return they are going to find their home and pets just as they left them and that during their absence, they will be kept updated on a regular basis.

It’s also helpful to be patient and let them share their concerns.

[bakindoki]

A great way to out HOs at ease is to anticipate their needs and concerns.

Our profile covers the vast majority of concerns and questions most HO would have so they don’t have to go digging. This includes reassurance in experience with their type of pet, making it clear I’ve read the whole profile, ability to maintain their home and keep it clean, and speaking proactively on communication style.

I also have a list of questions and requests a video call if it’s not offered. Asking good questions makes a big difference.

Promptness or transparency around messaging is also huge…always providing a back up contact format from the onset, being in time or early, and very prompt to respond…basically being professional and very clear so that I never have to be chased for information and demonstrate I know what I’m doing.

All the above being said though, I agree with @Maggie8K…if an HO comes across as too nervous or stressy even after I’ve done the above, it could be a red flag and I may choose to cancel or decline my application. For some people it will be impossible to make them happy no matter what you do and it’s not worth the risk to me when HO expectations don’t seem realistic or somewhat logic-driven/excessively emotionally charged.

[GotYourBack]

We’ve completed several sits for first-time Pet Parents and for anxious Pet Parents.

We perceive that nervousness seems to have different sources … unclear on how housesitting works (roles, responsibilities) … unsettled at concept of stranger being in property … anxious about community/neighbours … worries that everyday pet care will be executed … fear that their precious pets will not survive without owners! … fear that owners may not survive without pets!! … unsure how housesitter will react when told last-minute surprises (yep been there … didn’t i tell you that pet sleeps in human bed or is highly leash reactive or wakes very each morning or or or … ugh).

Our tactics vary considerably varying on perceived source of Pet Parent nerves.

Video calls can be more explanatory. A trick used in coaching is set clear boundaries by defining what’s not going to happen. We’re not going to invite guests; host a party; leave animals for duration beyond what’s agreed; leave messy property.

Most of the time, Pet Parent nerves seem to focus on pets. So we focus there. We’re calm people a, accustomed to various pets. Typically we can read pet behaviour and engage appropriately. For shy pets then we apply patience, and let them meet us in their own time. We often see big sign of relief from nervous Pet Parents when they see their pet(s) engaging and happy in our presence.

[Jenny]

Thanks, everyone, for sharing such thoughtful perspectives!

A few themes came through for me while reading through your replies, particularly the importance of good upfront communication, active listening, and setting clear expectations.

It sounds like for many first-time hosts, regular updates and reassurance can help build confidence, while others are comfortable with a more hands-off approach.

I think it’s fair to say that finding the right balance and being transparent about what each person needs is key!

[ChiaGrowth]

I dont like a host that seems to spy on me, or seems to want constant reassurance BUT I do like a host who goes upfront “I am nervous when I am not around my pets, it helps me if you send a daily photo”. Usually then I even send a morning and evening one. My issue is with someone who clearly is in distress but belittles it or does not upfront tell me. Or who words it with “I´m scared to leave my pet with you”, as if it was something about me that makes them nervous. I am much more stressed when I am unsure on how often/what kind of updates the host wants. As long as you’re happy with a picture of your cat on the same spot every day, as that’s where they spend 90% or their time

[SeniorSitter1]

I understand what you are saying completely . My last pets, two cats, I was nervous leaving them at a cat hotel that turned out to be a disaster. They came back sick after 5 days, never again. Before these platforms were available. Sitters on here saying they should just look at all my glorious reviews and should not be nervous come off very narcissistic to me and I am saying this as a sitters.

[Maggie8K]

This plus this is an example of why I would avoid extra anxious hosts — they tend to waste people’s time: Interviewing multiple candidates - #115 by Candide .

[Silversitters]

Approximately 50 % of our sits have been for hosts new to THS . When it’s seemed helpful, we’ve made suggestions about what information we need in a Welcome Guide to ensure a smooth sit. That said, most new hosts we’ve sat for have already had this sorted without needing any input from us.

For all hosts (new or experienced ) in our application we say that we’ll provide regular updates . During our video call we’ll ask (if we are chosen as your sitters) how often would you like to receive updates ?

The THS concept doesn’t suit everyone . For the mutual exchange to work, the host needs to trust the THS concept—that having a “stranger” live in their home to care for their pets will be great for their pets . They also must feel confident in their chosen sitter. This after carefully reading reviews, having a video call, and doing their due diligence.

If a host starts out not trusting the process, or not trusting that their chosen sitter can properly care for their home and pets, it’s unlikely that any amount of reassurance will change that.

For that reason we’ve chosen not to sit for hosts who are overly anxious about the process.

[Kimbyeya]

I’m a new host. I thought collecting interviews was what are supposed to do? I thought finding the best fit for both was the goal? Could you or someone please explain?

[Maggie8K]

There are explanations on this thread.

[ChiaGrowth]

Interviewing multiple candidates is a thread which explores many sides of this argument. I recommend reading it lightly, it is long and revolves in circles, but I think it has many great messages that help explain different thoughts.