Malicious and unjust negative review from owner

Sitter Questions, Advice & Chat
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Hello, I recently recieved a really unfair negative review and wanted to get some advice.

I have completed over 15 house sits, all with 5 star reviews and pride myself on being an extremely conscientious and reliable house sitter, I take cleaning, caring for pets and being responsible very seriously.

The owner for this particular sit didn’t provide any clear instructions for walking the dogs or any general household info, when I arrived it was dirty and the bins were full and smelly as well as there being loads of gone off food in the fridge that I had to throw out (nothing like 2 hours of cleaning up other people’s mess when you first arrive). When I therefore had to ask her things (due to her giving confusing information) she took an entitled and condescending tone in the messages, which didn’t feel good at all.

We had confirmed the time I would be leaving prior to the sit (I have in writing her saying “don’t worry, leaving at 7:30 is fine!”), however, on the last day of the sit, she text me 10 minutes before I was leaving (so you can imagine - gathering up my things and about to lock up and get in the car to go to work) asking me to walk the dogs, something which would take at least half an hour and that she must have known I would not have time to do. After having to deal with her confusing messaging and her out of the normal demands of a house sit, I was already feeling pretty disrespected. She’d previously also told me someone else was coming half an hour after me, so her inconsistent plans/messaging was really frustrating. It felt like she was trying to manage multiple sitters, making mistakes and not taking responsibility for this.

I replied to her explaining that as planned, I was leaving in 10 minutes and would not have time to do that. In my message (on Whatsapp) I pointed out to her some issues with the sit, to which she immediately retaliated by going directly onto the website and left me a really sh*tty 1 star review. I was so gutted. I had done an excellent job looking after her pets and home and she did this just to be really nasty.

To add insult to injury, she’d asked me to stay an extra night (to which I said yes) but then pretended to kick up a fuss about me leaving at this time in the morning - which we had confirming in writing prior to the sit (and ‘was fine’) and also the audacity to do that after i’d stayed an extra night.

To demonstrate that this woman has particularly unreasonable expectations from a house sitter, one of their chickens passed away when they were away and when I communicated this to her, she asked me to dig a 1 metre hole in the ground to bury it (!!!). I was shocked, that is tough physical labour that should absolutely not be asked or expected from a house sitter.

I am really angry that THS do not protect sitters from harmful and entitled owners such as this. My 10+ 5 star reviews has now been completely tainted by a really selfish woman. I responded to the review but this of course doesn’t really do much.

I have contacted THS and they said they only remove reviews that breach the terms and conditions. I appealed this only to receive the same email copied and pasted. I am so so disappointed by this and it has stopped me wanting to use this platform. It had become a really pleasant thing to do and a good way to travel, but I feel quite demoralised by this experience.

THS said as long as the sit has not breached their terms of service they won’t remove the review. I don’t understand how leaving a factually inaccurate and malicious review does not breach their terms of service??? I feel completely let down by them.

Has anyone else had a similar experience and what did they do about it?

Many thanks.

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Had this HO any previous reviews? Any red flags there (maybe in hindsight)? Were there missing reviews (you can only see that in the app).

What review did you leave?

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I am sorry that you had this experience- did you actually meet the owner in person ? Or were you taking over from another sitter ?

This ( rare) kind of behaviour by hosts is why we would pull out of a sit if the hosts refuse to provide a welcome guide soon after sit is confirmed . That’s a red flag for us .

Do you have other sits already confirmed ? If so , this review will soon be buried amongst all your 5 star reviews .

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Oh boy, what a situation you find yourself in!

I’m surprised that you believe that your reply to her review won’t do anything (assuming you mean a response to her review, not your feedback about the sit). You have two ways of providing your side of the story—have you already availed yourself of both?

Future HO’s will see that this was a one off and your many 5*reviews will shine thru.

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If a pet died under my care, I wouldn’t judge that the pet was a chicken. Even if the death was in no way my fault, I’d feel terrrible for the owner and if they asked me to burry it, I’d bury it.

If I was on a dog sit, and wasn’t ending the sit with an in-person hand-off, I’d be sure to schedule my time with time to walk the dog shortly before leaving. That’s common sense.

Those two things are on you, not the homeowner. I’m not arguing about the conditions of the home or other things you encountered which you could have taken points off in your review.

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As a HO, I agree with @Peonie19 . Your reply to their review does matter @HE_tea !

It’s surprisingly common for HOs to make a mistake when giving stars for sitters, so I don’t quite trust the 4 or lower star-ratings blindly, but always read the reviews and responses (if any).

If the review you got seems unreasonable and the response you gave and your review of the HO are balanced and factual, I wouldn’t worry too much.

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You would dig a 1 meter hole? For a chicken? That is a massive amount of digging.

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There was no judgement that it was a chicken. I dealt with that very responsibly and as you say, it had absolutely nothing to do with me. Have you thought about how deep 1 metre is? It’s extremely deep and is actually not physically possible for some people to do that in dry summer ground and on your own.

I think this is what irks me, is that given my already arranged leaving time, I’d already considered taking the dogs out and sorting them out before I left, that’s common sense.

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What did you say in your review of the Owner?

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I’m sorry you had this experience. It seems you really stretched for this homeowner. In retrospect the lack of clear instructions might have been a red flag, and the conditions of the home when you arrived. If you faced the same again, I’m sure you would have pulled out before the sit even began, but you were kind and wanted to make the best of it. It can be something to learn of for others.

I’m sure this will have little effect for you with all your great reviews. HOs I’m sure also do due diligence, and check both you and the HOs reviews. And a lot of members are both pet sitters and HOs and know that a bad sit can happen. Just keep your reviews and responses factual. I’ve seen reviews from HOs that were frantic, and it is quite easy to read between the lines. The 1* will soon be buried.

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I would start digging before judging what the dirt was like, what I was hitting and whether or not it was possible. If it was not possible, I’d discuss alternatives with the homeowner including whether or not there was a neighbor/friend who could help out with this. I wouldn’t treat the ask as evidence of entitlement. I wouldn’t judge the ask.

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Greetings @HE_tea ,

Thank you for sharing your awful experience.

THS is a matchmaking site…instead of two people finding love, one person finds a house/pet sitter and the other finds a home to stay without financial compensation…the old barter system. Nothing will go right 100% of the time.

Much like a bad date, the next one should be better and you have a story to tell…not many people can say they dug a 1 meter hole for a chicken. And honestly…I would NOT have done so, I would have put it in a freezer and let the HO worry about it upon their return, especially after the treatment you experienced.

You have over 15 sits and one negative review. Clearly, you are doing a lot right.
Brush it off, move on and enjoy the next sit! Best of luck moving forward!!!

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Thank you for your reply and the reassurance :heart:

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You’ve got enough strong reviews that rational hosts will take things in context.

It’s actually helpful that she gave you a one-star review, because it makes her look extreme, an outlier who’s probably unreasonable. All of us have seen such reviewers in various ratings ecosystems and the rational among us know to discount them with judgment.

Plus, for some discerning sitters, we look at reviews that THS hosts previously gave to other sitters. That’s to gauge whether they’d be good hosts. By being extreme, she’s shot herself in the foot unwittingly, because savvy sitters will probably avoid her sits going forward.

In the future, I suggest better protecting yourself as a sitter, simply because THS is just a bartering platform in most ways and they don’t screen hosts or sits. And reality is, there are creepy, weaselly people in the world, including terrible hosts (and sitters).

For instance, I require a welcome guide well ahead of any sit. That’s so I can look for any potential issues and/or ask Qs. In one case for example, that allowed me to cancel a sit where the host had withheld info earlier about a dog that needed letting out at night to do his business and another that was prone to diarrhea.

I mention during video chats that I’ll be looking out for the welcome guide. I frame it as making sure I can take care of their pets and home well. If time draws near for me to book travel or make plans and there’s still no welcome guide, I send a friendly nudge that makes clear I won’t go into sits blind. I’m prepared to cancel a sit if a host doesn’t cooperate. So far, I’ve not had any problems since I started doing that — I get robust welcome guides.

Sitters have power, because no one can force us to show up. I use that agency to make sure I avoid getting stuck with a bad sit and/or too little info. I suggest that other sitters use their power accordingly.

Some folks want to be nice, give everyone benefit of the doubt or such. That works only with decent people — which there’s no guarantee of in life or THS. If you don’t protect yourself (within reason), it’s unfortunately easy to get burned unnecessarily.

This is also why it’s important to set and uphold boundaries. There’s good reason why there’s the saying that you give some people an inch and they’ll take a mile.

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@HE_tea

I’ll keep this brief, but a 1 * review will almost always look petty and non constructive.

Reply with a factual and calm response and the vast majority of HO will see straight through the petty review you received.

Youll be fine, trust me.

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I can promise you that it is not easy. I dug a grave for a cat in a dry garden in southern France last year, and I don’t think I got further down than 30 cm or so.

(Not a cat I was sitting for. It had made a friend there, it was her cat.)

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Hi @HE_tea, welcome to the forum.
I am really sorry you had to go through such an unpleasant experience and then be unfairly reviewed. I completely agree with @Maggie8K that

You have received a fair amount of good advice here. Unfortunately, only for future use, since the sit is over and you have already

You don’t mention if you have reviewed her or if you did, what kind of review you wrote. But that’s also water under the bridge now.
Again, for future use, given the entitlement that you had already perceived, I don’t think this was a good idea:

It seems you were in a hurry to leave and the owner was trying to convince you to walk the dogs. I really don’t think it was a good time or situation to give feedback.
You say she

This was only possible because you stayed an extra night and the sit had officially concluded the previous day. Otherwise, the owner would have had at least a few hours to consider her review.
Finally, I think THS is right in not removing people’s reviews unless there’s some mistake. In this case, they let you amend the review. Both HOs and sitters need to be protected and nobody’s side can be unilaterally taken without a proper investigation.

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To avoid preyeaters/ wild animals to dig up the dead animal again, you have to dig at least a 75 cm, better 100 cm deep hole.

So if you always bury your pets, then it is a quite normal request to dig a 1 meter deep hole.

Petsitting comes with responsibilities. With advantages and disadvantages.

The death of an animal and their proper way of burying/ cremating/ taking it to the vet to be “disposed” is unfortunately a horrible experiences.
The owner and the sitter both didn’t ask for the death of an animal whilst being away on holiday/ petsitting. In my opinion, as a sitter the best you can do is to take care of the pet and honour their wishes at that moment.

Regardless what kind of pet it is.

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And thank you for mansplainning it. I’ve had actual experience doing this thing.

Edited in line with forum guidelines

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Agreed - as an HO, if I am considering a sitter with lots of great reviews with one abysmal one, I’m more likely to dismiss the bad one entirely, unless the review is measured and the response is angry/defensive (I’m assuming neither is true in this case). A 3 star review would probably get more attention from me.

Either way, as long as that shows as your last review, it’s probably a good idea to approach it straight on with new applications, but it shouldn’t hurt you with reasonable HOs.

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