More should be done for Happy sits

Owner Questions, Advice & Chat
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Ive been using THS for about 2 or so years and met some wonderful sitters, even made some friends. It was only recently I was aware of this community forum to see an insight into more of the community here.

First off I am shocked to see all horror stories from Sitters and Pet parents alike, and i’m wondering what more can be done to improve the community, some things I am reading are putting me off this platform all together, I feel the concept is amazing, and used in the right way people can have some amazing experiences. But I also notice this community being used to moan and joke about the small things in pet parents homes, particularly from the full time sitters, where some have listed their ‘pet peeves’ and it concerns me slightly, although often light hearted there are some strange attitudes here as well towards Pet parents i’ve seen as well, and THS should do more.

I can imagine being a full time sitter particularly is not an easy lifestyle, meeting new people, new homes and pets all the time, the welcome guides with different instructions, the routines. Ive suspected for a while some of full time sitters are ‘weary’ of sitting and the same problems they face each time, or also feel under appreciated by Pet parents and not supported enough by the platform. But also I see some that get annoyed at lengthy home tours, or prefer not to meet the Pet parents altogether, things like this is concerning and off putting.

I feel to help this problem, THS should be doing more to encourage generosity from home owners, I know it’s not paid, but at least more guidance given on how to be good hosts, how to be humane, encourage better healthier communication, perhaps more details should be made on sitters and pet parents profiles what they need and expect out of a sit? Encourage to leave basics in the fridge for sitters for example or encouraging to help with any travel costs in some cases when needed. I always try and leave my sitters something so they are comfortable, whether it’s a little bit of cash to buy basics (the shops nearby me are expensive) or some eggs and milk for example. People should not take advantage of free sitters.

On the other side of things, I think they should be doing more to vet people, look more closely and have a system for cancellations so this is recorded and these horror sitters, pet owners can not do sits again.

Thoughts?

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I have no complaints about the owners that I have done a pet sit for, but I agree that THS should encourage more generosity and hospitality.

Instead, THS allows owners to charge for utilities and cleaners and more. THS tells owners to leave an empty fridge. They discourage owners from giving incentives other than use of a car.

Main problem are the guidelines for cleaning. The sitter is not only expected to do ordinary tidying up, but there are even instructions to launder bedclothes and towels on the day of departure! This then leads to some HOs complaining about a piece of pasta in the kitchen sink, sofa cushions in disarray, etc.

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Forum in its essence. The majority of people, especially new users, seek forums when things don´t work for them; either to ask questions or complain.
Not surprisingly newcomers, like yourself, are shocked on their first visit by the chaos (and more). This is just the way most forums work.
Btw, welcome
What can be done? Hmmm … on/with this forum? I wish I knew.

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I’m a full time sitter but not yet getting weary. I’ve encountered some extremely generous hosts but also some very mean ones - I often cite a Christmas & New Year sit I did where nothing was left for me at all. A bottle of wine for Christmas would have been a nice gesture. At the very least I like some milk to be left. I was surprised on returning to a sit, lovely home and owners, when the fridge was completely empty. You’re right, I think some owners may take THS instructions as gospel!

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I think THS does a lot with the T&c’s; member code of conduct; emails to remind home hosts how to prepare: emails to remind thsitters how to prepare; the welcome guide reminder; newsletters; the forum and blog articles.

THS can’t be all things to all members (but does have room to be run more like a 21st century online platform.)

And human nature is waaaay to expansive as a continuum for its members to all be unproblematically harmonious (but toward that end is a fine intent.)

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It is human nature to seek out a forum when things go wrong. Therefore lots of negative stuff on here. In the past I have limited myself on reading posts as they were so depressing or even bitchy. People asking for advice then having a tantrum when they didn’t get the advice they wanted.
We have been sitters for about 8 years, full time 3 years, and we love the life. I select our sits very carefully and write a lengthy application which outlines what the pet parent can expect from us and a little bit about ourselves. As for generosity of the home owners I cannot complain about any of them. I gladly accept an empty fridge (so many food allergies) and a little space in the freezer. If I want a bottle of wine I buy it for myself. I sit where I would be travelling to anyway so my fare/travel expenses are all budgeted for. When I’m abroad the use of a car would never be turned down but not essential.
Communication is the key to a good sit. I make sure I know what is expected of me and let them know what I expect. If they arrive in the afternoon I will do laundry but if it is late at night I strip the bed in the morning and leave it all in a pile. Guests bedding is not a priority when a family of four are returning from two weeks away with all their dirty clothing. I clean the house to what I believe is my high standards and I have never, ever been asked to pay for cleaners, gardeners, utilities etc. I clean, I make sure the garden is tidy. The utilities, if it was somewhere ver hot (or cold) I would offer to pay the difference between what I used and their normal bill. I am a woman of a certain age who overheats very easily.
I am very happy with my lifestyle. I try to stay positive and make “happy” comments here. I have learnt from experience not to call someone out for doing something stupid so I just ignore it.
Life is good. And I can honestly say good communication, honesty and a sense of humour makes it that way on THS.

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I don’t need much from THS to help with happy sits, except to push sitters and hosts who exploit others off the platform. Of course, THS is loathe to do that, given their wanting to retain and grow membership.

I’ve had overwhelmingly great experiences. I screen and withdraw at any hint of possible trouble. There are going to be creepy, untrustworthy, unreliable, inconsiderate people among THS members, because they exist among more civilized humans, unfortunately. They aren’t the majority, of course.

I think each person has to calibrate for themselves whether their sensitivities might be served by self-care — like spending less time on the forum if needed, if they feel dragged down by negativity, complaints, venting or such. That’s the nature of these sorts of forums, but they don’t represent the overwhelming number of sits. It’s like you don’t go to a hospital and expect everyone to be healthy — people are there because they have complaints, not because they’re perfectly well. It helps to keep perspective.

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I think you make a lot of good points here. My perspective is as a sitter. I have been doing this full time for a decade and my experience has been overwhelmingly positive. There was only one sit that was ‘bad’ and that we had to leave early because the HO misrepresented so many things, and even then, we stuck it out 6 weeks of the nine we were supposed to be there. It was so long ago, I often forget about it actually.

While there have sometimes been unexpected things like a behavioral issue the owner didn’t mention or something I didn’t anticipate about the location that I didn’t like as much, I can’t say we have ever had any truly bad experiences. We have never encountered a HO who treated us poorly or with whom we had conflict. We have always gotten along very well with every HO and they have always been very appreciative of our services.

Even the aforementioned sit had a lot of amazing aspects to it, and I knew certain things would be challenging going in so it wasn’t like we were suffering horribly.

While even the most careful vetting and due diligence can’t 100 percent prevent a sitter from having a potentially bad sits, that we have had such a good experience for so long can’t simply be chalked up to ‘luck.’ If sitters are having bad experiences on a more regular basis, they need to evaluate how they are going about this process more carefully.

It is really important for sitters to get a sense of what they value in the experience overall, what they value as far as their day to day experience, their preferences, etc… and let that guide your choices. It is all too easy to compromise on really important things simply because a location is desirable, a sit fits well with your schedule, there is fear you won’t fill those dates,etc…

Listening to your intuition is really important too and I know it can be harder to do so in a situation like this. When we have an intuitive nudge to avoid something, we usually won’t get that nudge validated in any way since we chose not to pursue that opportunity, and we will never actually know if it was bad. There are probably many instances where my nudge may not have been correct, and everything may have been fine, but with so many opportunities, no reason to take the risk.

I think another important thing people need to consider on both sides is that THS, while its support and offerings are much more robust than other sites, is at the core no different from them in that their primary function is as an introductory platform.

Anyone can join the site as a sitter provided they can provide ID, or in the case of US residents, pass a background check. It is not like the site is some sort of agency where they are personally vetting those providing the service and working personally with a HO to pair them with a sitter.

I appreciate that they do make an effort to address certain problems, set certain terms and conditions that are designed to make the experience more positive on both sides ,etc…but at the end of the day, there is not much they can do about some of the more common issues.

They can’t force a HO to take a trip they want to cancel; they can’t tell them they can’t come back to their own home early; they can’t make a sitter do a sit they want to cancel. They can’t personally inspect houses to make sure they are meeting some arbitrary standard of cleanliness.

There is risk on both sides, and like others have said, a forum of any kind will skew towards more negative experiences, but I do believe that the vast majority of sits go well for both parties.

Sitting is a completely voluntary activity, but some people talk about it on here as if it is the only job available in an awful economy and they simply have no choice but to work for big, bad THS. I certainly don’t agree with a lot of changes they have made on the site, but I am very grateful for its existence, and don’t make them out to be something they are not.

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With THS appealing to such a diverse range of people who are members for various reasons, there are bound to be differences in opinion and attitude, especially when you also take into consideration the fact that we’re operating within an international community.

Communication is therefore absolutely key for me to ensure I have a ‘happy sit’, and it’s on me, rather than THS, to make sure those conversations happen. By the time I’ve read a listing, written a one-off application for a sit, and exchanged a few messages, I usually have a reasonable gut instinct as to whether or not there is some common ground between myself and a home owner in terms of our attitude and approach to the exchange that we’re considering. And yes, it does matter, even though they won’t be there for the majority of the sit. I would hope that they also feel that they have a pretty good measure of me.

I don’t believe that THS will ever vet sitters or home owners any more than they currently do. It would be neither practical nor in their financial interest to do so. It’s really up to the community at large to use the review system in a fair and responsible way to ensure that this happens.

It seems to me that a lot of the so-called horror stories that we read on the forum boil down to reality not aligning with expectations. Perhaps this could be better managed if the original THS ethos of a sit being a mutually beneficial exchange were promoted more, rather than pushing the concept of free pet care, or a free place to stay. As we all know, ‘there’s no such thing as a free lunch!’

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THS might be slowly cooling off its “travel for free” concept. Not only do the ads that were plastered all over the world seem to be vanishing but also the home page begins to return to its former state. Maybe they run out of money, but maybe just maybe they are might be correcting the course

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I’m not sure what more THS can do to encourage good hospitality from hosts or responsibility from sitters. At the moment, both should get emails reminding them of how to create/have a good visit, but not everyone receives them, and if they do, sadly not everyone reads them.

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Totally agree with you. We’re sitters and we have completed almost 30 sits, and all of them have been great, no scary stories at all, we’ve had an amazing time, met some fantastic pets, and brilliant owners, although we know at some point that something is bound to go wrong.

This forum is a very negative place because people only post when they have a problem that they need help with, and others (like us) are here simply to help if we can.

Some of the problems that people raise are linked to HO’s not finding sitters or sitters not getting sits, sometimes linked to their own profile being lack-lustre. While others just don’t seem to trust their own intuition and gut-feeling when looking for sits or sitters. Some others seem to raise points where they seem to have forgot about how it’s nice to be good natured and helpful to one another. But others have very valid problems whereby they need real help or need to offload, and that’s where the forum really does seem to help I think.

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Same here. My last two sits both had super kind, generous hosts, who went way beyond what THS recommends, getting me food, giving me lifts, etc.

I had two bad sits last year, but the last one was as far back as October. I might be getting better at picking the right sits, or else the majority of hosts are still lovely people, despite the absurd profiles I sometimes see pop up in the search.

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Yup, my latest hosts picked me up from the train station (in the U.K.) and on my leaving offered to take me where I wanted — train station, next town or whatever. Same as the first time I sat for them.

They also asked whether I wanted groceries and offered me bottles of wine. Told me to help myself to what food I liked. And this time they asked whether I wanted to stay over extra, presumably to sightsee.

I just accepted a sit elsewhere and that host voluntarily sent the welcome guide immediately. It was the best I’ve seen yet. And they asked whether I prefer red or white wine.

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First thank you for posting this.
I am a full time international very happy sitter on my seventh year with THS and I have had overwhelming joy in my experiences.
Everything in life will have moments that are challenging. Personally I have had my share of moments where I have been way out of my comfort zone, sometimes downright scary or utterly disappointing.
BUT and yes it is a very big BUT, I have an uncommon perspective in that I don’t allow temporary external forces dominate my unshakable character or my goals. I don’t allow the weather to alter my path.
I also take accountability for the choices I have made and don’t feel it is THS’s responsibility to make sure that all my experiences are to my liking.
Whenever something happens I don’t look for who to blame. I choose to look for what I could have done differently and look to see where I can improve in future with screening sits. I am very selective now. One could say my standards have been raised so that I find what best suits me. So there is no one to blame but only to learn and keep getting better.
I am the only person that can control how I feel, what direction to go.
Unfortunately the forum has been for a very long time, I will dare to say since the beginning, a gathering hole for folks to vent, looking for others to validate them.
Every once in a while we get people who have figured out that they control their experiences and share some wonderful stories but sadly they get lost and forgotten buried under all the repetitive and unrelenting resurgence of negativity and we just keep going on in our very happy lives.
So for those who have taken the time to read this far, do your best to understand that the forum is not a true representation of how wonderful home and pet sitting can be.
YOU (everyone) is the only person who can do and create happy sits. Be the best sitter, be the best host.
It’s the best thing I’ve learned to do that has enabled me to live the very best life I never imagined was possible.
And yes, I am fully nomadic, I am not broke, not poor, extremely well educated and I am very grateful, blessed and free!

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Hi Everyone, and thanks to everyone who has replied, it’s really great hearing your opinions and positive stories as well.
I myself have had some wonderful experiences too and so enjoy meeting sitters each time from all over the world. Feeling much less bogged down by this forum :slight_smile:

Thanks so much guys x

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Once again @Amparo your words and wisdom are so spot on. It’s so easy to blame others for the choices we make in our lives, not just on THS. Continue to live that special nomadic life you have chosen.

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As a full-time sitter, I haven’t grown weary yet, but my experiences have varied widely. I’ve had some incredibly generous hosts, but also some quite unkind ones. For example, during a Christmas and New Year sit, nothing was left for me—not even a bottle of wine. At the very least, I like to find some milk left for me. Once, I returned to a lovely home with wonderful owners, only to find the fridge completely empty. I agree that some owners may take TrustedHousesitters (THS) instructions too literally!

Edited to remove link in accordance with forum guidelines

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I disagree that there should be charges for utlities. I have spent hours each day taking care of younger or older dogs. No room in the fridge or freezer, despite being on a multi week stay. I have never left a dog for more than 3 hours. I haven’t travelled for siteseeing, I used the service for a free place to stay while in a town I need to help with my kid. So I really look at it for dog sitting. I assume, if I was only cat sitting and could leave the cat for all day, that is different. Dogs require a lot more care than cats.

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But we agree! THS should not allow charges.

THS could change its instructions to encourage greater hospitality.

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