I wanted to share a recent experience and hear your thoughts. I applied for a sit in the UK that sounded lovely—two flatcoat retrievers in a beautiful countryside home. However, the listing included very little information about the dogs or their routines. I’ve done many sits before and know how important it is to have these details to plan properly, so in my application, I kindly asked a few questions:
What the dogs’ daily routine looks like (walks, feeding, etc.)
How long they can be left alone
If there are outdoor cameras installed (since indoor cameras are prohibited by Trusted Housesitters)
Whether third parties (e.g., cleaners, gardeners) might be present, as this also requires prior agreement.
I kept my tone light and helpful, as the homeowner mentioned they are new to Trusted Housesitters and might not have realized these things are important.
The homeowner replied politely, but added that they would prefer UK-based sitters because it’s “more straightforward.” They didn’t clarify what they meant by this, but it felt like my questions might have put them off. I also suggested that they mention this preference, for only UK sitters, in their listing, as it saves time for international sitters applying through this very global platform.
I’m sharing this because I feel like my questions may have been taken the wrong way. Have others had similar experiences when asking about missing information? How do you handle it when homeowners have unstated preferences or seem to react negatively to helpful feedback?
I have experienced it, and I now regard it as an important part of my assessment of the host and sit.
It could be just inexperience with platform if tasks are not described, but a possible sign that the host does not see the mutuality and the sitter side of a mutual exchange.
An answer disregarding the needs of a sitter when asked directly is more serious and a red flag to me. The answer you’ve got - in my opinion - show that they don’t get what THS is about, and don’t acknowledge the importance of putting the sitter in a position of being able to assess whether it is a good match and indeed is able to do the tasks the pet needs. So I would absolutely now regard an answer (also in the form of a decline) as a gift - the gift of avoiding the host.
One time I applied for a sit, and as it was unclear in listing asked if the dog went to the bathroom inside (in the nicest way - possibly considering either way) and the host immediately clicked decline. I guess that was an answer to the question.
I don’t know about the UK, but in many European countries cameras in/outside homes are not common, so that might have seemed like a weird question for the HO
I never ask about 3rd party in my application either. I assume there won’t, except if it’s mentioned in the video chat. Basically, such details are best discussed in the video chat rather than in an application as it may put people off - perhaps thinking that you’re probably quite demanding, picky, or likewise
@Bluehorse Asking about these details isn’t about being demanding or picky—it’s about ensuring a good fit for both parties and following THS guidelines. Of course, video chats are an excellent opportunity to discuss things in more depth, but when important details like the dogs’ routines, third-party presence, or camera use aren’t included in the listing, it seems reasonable to ask upfront. This helps save time and avoid mismatched expectations.
If someone feels annoyed or “put off” by such questions, then it’s clear they’re not a good match for us, and we can simply say: Next. We’re not beggars, we don’t need to keep delicate questions to the video chat so our chances are better to get a foot in the door. We are grown-up people, with only 5 star reviews, we do not NEED to do this, it’s a hobby.
And by the way, as this forum clearly shows, cameras, even in Europe and especially in the UK, are a major issue.
I’m not saying one shouldn’t ask about dog routines in their application but I definitely think HOs can be put off by asking about cameras and 3rd parties in an application. That’s better addressed in a video chat, as it potentially suggests quite a distrust to begin with before having established real contact.
Yes you might be right, but I do not want to waste time applying and taking time for a video call for a sit that has gardeners or cleaners coming. This is an absolute no go for me.
Your way, we all have our prefs, however your original question revolved around “I’m sharing this because I feel like my questions may have been taken the wrong way.”
And that may indeed have been the case, so consider whether an HO is likely to pick you or someone else when they are confronted with such questions directly in the application, while they may not have any gardeners/cleaners and so forth.
In 50+ sits I’ve never sat at a place with a gardener yet, never one with a camera, and only once with a cleaner that came during the sit - and all without ever asking for this upfront. Maybe I’ve been lucky, or maybe the ‘risk’ of those is low on the majority of sits
Even if a gardener came in the backyard only to mow the grass and blow the leaves for 15 minutes once a week? You don’t even have to be there, you still would say no?
I agree it could be good reasons - any reason would be up to each party - but to save everyones time then that too should be listed. As some hosts do. We prefer locals, we are looking for a sitter already in the country and such.
Then sitters needn’t waste their own and the hosts time and the host won’t get the five spots filled up with applicants the host isn’t going to want anyway.
So the listing isn’t disclosing accurately either the responsibilities of the sit or what the host is looking for in a sitter. Waste of time for everyone.
One way of adressing it @Fatamorgana is to do what I believe @Maggie8K has mentioned - dropping a few lines in your own listing. She has a paragraph, I think, reminding unaware hosts about a few points of the THS terms of service as she works from home. 3rd parties and cameras could be adressed in your listing, perhaps.
But I see no harm in mentioning it in an application either. If someone takes offense in such a legit question re the terms, then thank you, it is not a good match.
Your questions seem entirely reasonable @Fatamorgana & you probably dodged a bullet. I’m making an assumption here but my guess is it’s an over entitled British HO who hasn’t thought it through, hasn’t had sitters before, doesn’t get the mutual exchange concept & is old school. Your forthrightness probably spooked them &/or they’d prefer a sitter they can mould into doing their bidding. Shame as who doesn’t love a flat coat or two & a nice big country pad #bulletdodged
I think all those questions on an application could have come across as a bit off putting, I generally ask those on a video call, but if the HO didn’t want overseas sitters, they should have stated that. I don’t believe indoor cameras are a problem in the UK, I’ve been sitting for 11 years and never seen a single one in my dozens of UK sits, I thought it was more of an American thing. Doorbell cameras are quite common, but external cameras are for security, and are allowed by THS.
It’s mentioned in my profile as well, but I am always surprised how many HOs do not read a sitter’s profile in full. We are pretty busy with work sometimes, especially when not sitting, so I try to avoid unnecessary video calls that take up time.
So far, our sits have always been excellent, I’m thankful for that.
You did all of the right things and you should continue to be thorough and selective in your application process.
You did not do anything wrong and these inexperienced homeowners have unfortunately wasted your time. It may be the first time but it certainly will not be the last.
When I was new to THS as a HO, questions about my dog’s routine would’ve made me realise that I should add that to my listing. But a lecture about rules on top of that, no matter how it was worded, would’ve been a turnoff and I would’ve come up with some excuse for declining. As that HO did.
I’m not a HO, however if I were one, your questions, especially because you wrote them in a lighter tone, would make me realize that indeed more info is needed in my listing. I’d thank you for that!
I hate wasting my (and other people’s) time. Being a good match for a sitter (and viceversa) is vital for a great experience, so bring on all the questions needed to figure out whether the two parties are indeed a good fit for each other.
I think I’ll update my profile to include that I’m more than happy to sit where there are external security cameras and that I have no problems with either gardeners or cleaners while I’m on a sit.
