Hi all, coming in here to get things off my chest.
I just got home from holidays to a few things that haven’t gone well:
Untidy kitchen and trash not taken out.
Recycling left on the counter.
Wrong things put in the wrong bins.
Dirty bed linen.
But what I’m most annoyed about is that the sitter opened some food and toiletries that I had received as gifts and were completely sealed (eg bottles of nice olive oil in a display box and bath salts also fully sealed) - I was keeping these to use myself, and I’m so so annoyed
The sitter also broke a jug but didn’t tell me - I just found the broken glass in the bin.
I didn’t explicitly say “don’t use my food or toiletries” but I thought any decent sitter wouldn’t fully use up nice unopened items and leave the rubbish for me to see!
What do you think?
I am also unsure what to do about the review - if I say this in their review is there a chance that they will leave me a bad review out of spite?
They won’t see your review till they’ve written theirs. They could leave a nasty reply to your review afterward, but that would seem retaliatory, which most folks could tell.
What you described — opening olive oil and toiletries uninvited — crosses lines that most sitters wouldn’t.
Dirty linens left on the bed, not good sitter behavior unless the host specifically requested that. Some do for instance because some pets will mess up mattresses when linens are removed. If you didn’t tell them what to do with linens, they could say that you never told them.
Things put back in the wrong place: Seems petty to mention.
The trash and recycling not taken out and some recycling left on the counter isn’t great, but isn’t big enough to mention, IMO, without risking that you’d be seen as petty and not being able to get sitters later.
Not at all OK that they broke something and left in the trash for you to discover. If that’s the case, mentioning the trash not taken out in that context makes sense.
I certainly don’t blame you for being annoyed. As a sitter, I leave every home spotless when I depart the sit. Never would I dream of opening gift sets or helping myself to the homeowner(s) food items other than condiments and spices. Now that we have a “blind” review system, you are certainly welcome to give an honest review of the sitter and neither of your reviews will be published until you have both written reviews. I would definitely comment on what you weren’t happy with to warn other homeowners. Hopefully this won’t put you off having other sitters as there are many wonderful sitters on this site.
Did this sitter have previous reviews? What did those say? And it is possible that previous owners did not leave a review, precisely because of such worries. The worst thing with the THS interface is that owners cannot see that.
For me, the most egregious thing is breaking something and not letting you know or trying to find a solution. While I wouldn’t open anything fancy, assuming you said they could use some of your stuff but didn’t specify what NOT to use, that could have just been an unwitting mistake. The mixed recycling, if you’re in the UK, I think you should let go. Recycling in the UK is next level ridiculous and beyond confusing. Even my Brit friends have a hard time keeping things straight. Last sit I did in the UK, they labeled each bin for what is supposed to go where and I would just put them ALL out every collection day and let the collectors take what they could. They should have taken it all out though. You should leave a fair but honest review highlighting the good things and mentioning the challenges. With the blind review system, they can’t leave a bad review in retaliation. But I’d take pics of anything that was wrong just to have backup, in case things go sideways.
Going forward, I would put anything you don’t want them using in a different location and specifying that it’s off limits. I always ask HOs to either remove stuff I shouldn’t use to a different area or point it out to me so I can be sure I don’t touch it. Realistically though I rarely use anything from the house and if I do it’s basics that I can easily replace like pasta, rice, tinned veg, etc.
Agreed. Breaking Something without notifying you is absolutely worth noting in your review.
With regards to the rest, if you were not explicit about how trash works, what you expect people to do with linens, and what food and toiletries are off limits, that’s poor communication on your part.
We don’t care if HS eat our food or need to borrow something in the bathroom but also clearly spell out in writing and verbally that if it’s something you would not easily be able to replace with an exact match, don’t use it, and then explicitly show what items are off limits.
I agree with @Maggie8K that a lot of what you mentioned may come across as nitpicky and make you look like a difficult HO UNLESS you were clear in your comms about expectations with HS and they blatantly disregarded your guidance.
IMO both breaking something and not letting you know and opening your sealed gift boxes is unacceptable. For me, the second is even more important. I think it’s obvious that you don’t open sealed gift boxes. Nobody needs to tell me.
Doesn’t sound like
I honestly think it works the other way round. We should only use what has been specified we can. Nothing else. Something different is when HOs say (just to be nice) “help yourself to any food or drink”, then they can’t really complain.
Not owning up to the broken jug is the big one @Kerry24 as that’s poor. Would ask the sitter directly about it & see if they offer to pay/replace for you. Opening sealed foodstuffs & toiletries is unusual but did you say help yourself & if not, what did you specify as every single HO has a different set up? That one is probably down to experience for putting them away next time. As for the rubbish and crumbs and dirty bed, dock a star on cleanliness and specify more to your next sitter is the simplest solution. Recycling does differ from county to county in the UK and is a pain. Were your pets well cared for and happy on your return as that’s the most important element? You have five categories for the sitter to rate them on. Agree with others that the small stuff niggling you will come across as petty when your sitter is not a house keeper, it’s all about setting out expectations on both sides. #commscommsconms
The most important things here is were the pets well and happy and your home generally cared for and clean. Yes annoying about the jug, was it an expensive object? I often don’t strip the bed, I always ask what they want done, but quite often with cats they are used to all the doors open and spend their time laying on it. I mostly leave before the owner returns, I clean and put the rubbish out but as others have said it is more complicated and in the UK and not the same in all towns. In future just put everything you don’t want used out of the way. Yes deduct a star but do think carefully about the wording of the review, don’t write in anger
Just thinking about the issues you’re most annoyed about:
On our current sit, the host has left an unopened bag of bath salts next to the bath in our ensuite. I presume they’re for us - this is the guest bedroom and bathroom - but we won’t open them, regardless.
@Kerry24 Did you leave your bath salts in the sitter’s ensuite bathroom? Or, were they left in a prominent position in the family bathroom which is designated for use by your sitters?
Equally, did you leave the olive oil package out on view in the kitchen and did you by any chance tell the sitters to ‘help themselves’ to stuff? It seems very likely they might have wrongly assumed you’d actually left these nice gifts out for them - it does happen when pet parents are especially generous!
It’s easy to initially think the worst, but I have to wonder if they possibly have assumed you’d left the gift sets especially for them, as a kind of welcome/thank you gesture?
Something very similar happened to me. Nice box of chocolate and a bottle of wine on the kitchen counter, completely separate from everything else in the kitchen. It looked like a present but there was no note. Asking if they were for me felt awkward. I decided not to consume them. I left a bunch of flowers and they thanked me but there was no mention of the unconsumed items. I still feel they were for me but with no explicit offer, I prefer not to risk it.
Most of the answers here consider that there were no important points. I agree the most important point is taking good care of the pets and leaving the house in a good condition but there are different categories and different degrees of achievement on those categories. Adding up all the issues, even if none of them is really important, I don’t feel that is a 5 star sit in all categories. As a sitter, I have never done any single thing of those, let alone all of them together.
It’s true we lack context. We don’t know how clear instructions regarding rubbish and cleaning were and if there was a explicit or implicit offer to help themselves to food or toiletries.
It’s a pity there isn’t a communication category for sitters because IMO the broken jug would fall under that category.
@Kerry24, please let us know what you decide about the review. I suggest being careful with the wording, it could backfire.
Some owners ask for help on this forum. There are real experts here on writing nice, informative, factual reviews.
I had a similar present left for me.
I messaged the HO and just wrote
Can I just check that the goodies in the basket are for me ? I don’t want to tuck in by mistake.
Her reply was Yes of course
To which I sent a short video clip of her very happy dog wagging her tail.
I don’t think anyone would be offended by asking and equally if she had replied That’s actually a present for my daughter I wouldn’t have minded in the slightest.
If I saw a toiletries gift box tucked away at the back of a cupboard or in a drawer then I would not open it .
However if it was put out in the guest bedroom or bathroom. I would probably assume it was intended for me as many owners have left us gifts like this .
If I break something I would notify the owner, apologise and replace (if possible) or offer to do so …most cases owner has said not to worry accidents happen . I would always inform the owner not let them find out for themselves . You could contact the sitter and say I notice that x got broken during your stay , I understand accidents happen but I would have liked to have been informed about this . See how they respond - they apologise or may offer to replace .
Bedding
Specify in your welcome guide what you want done with the bedding . If you have clean bedding that you want
on when they leave , let them know where this is kept . Every host differs .
Some owners have their bedding dry cleaned and pressed so don’t want sitter to wash the bedding ( we’ve had this on several sits ) some owners want bed stripped but don’t want bedding washed ( they want to use washing machine on their return or don’t have space for lots of laundry to be drying ) some request bedding to stay as it is and they will sort on their return . Especially when it’s a short stay owners don’t tend to expect sitters to wash the bedding on the last day . Whatever your wishes are make sure that are clearly stated in your Welcome Guide .
Recycling
Which country are you in ? From experience recycling is so complicated in U.K. with each council having different bins and different schedules for collection . Maybe add photos to your welcome guide to make it easier for the sitter to know what goes where or use the calendar feature to remind your sitters .
We have found that even on sits a few miles apart in U.K. the bin colours and recycling arrangements have been completely different .
Overall if your pets were well looked after than that is where your sitter has prioritised their time and attention, which is most likely what you wanted when choosing to use THS.
If you want to write in your review that the sitter get the recycling mixed up - you can comment on this but it likely will put off others sitters from applying in the future.
To clarify about the bins - I mean the rubbish bins. There was food in the general waste, plastic in the compost etc. That’s how I found the broken jug as I pulled out a plastic bag from the compost bin and found broken glass inside!
I said to them to use anything in the fridge that was going out of date while I was away - but opening and fully using nicely packaged items is crossing a line I think.
Can somebody please point me at where I can get more info on the review system and how it works?
I find it strange they opened gift boxes. But is there any way they thought you left them for them? But then they would have taken them, right? I now write “exit notes”. If I am leaving at a time, I can wash towels and linens, then I do, if I am leaving too early, then I write that everything is washed except bed linens. That I threw out the garbage on X day, and what is in the garbage is one day’s worth. Depending on garbage day etc. But I wouldn’t leave recyclables on the counter, that is strange.
As a sitter who typically leave after the sitter has returned home, washing bed linens before I leave is an impossible ask. Even if I wash them the night before, they would be slept in anyway. Also I like to hand iff in person rather than leaving after the owner gets home. That way we have a chance to chat.
I’m not in the UK and I was clear about what rubbish bin is for what - that was written in a message. Seeing plastic in the compost bin, pulling it out and finding something broken wasn’t ideal.
My message to the sitter was to use up anything in the fridge that was going out of date soon. The oils were not on view, they were in a high cupboard and the box was sealed and unopened.
I have messaged her via WhatsApp and asked about these - I will mention the broken item in the review and the cleanliness of the kitchen, but not in anger.
I hope this article about the review system will be useful. If you have specific questions, please ask. This forum is really helpful and you get quick answers.