Solo woman travellers

I started my TH journey solo, because I needed space and alone time during COVID.

My husband joins me sometimes… But I still prefer to go it alone for some (oxymoronically) no-responsibilities time.

The care and feeding of animals, who don’t have an opinion of where to get dinner when I don’t want to cook is a welcome respite.:grin:

6 Likes

A great topic @MissChef and very relevant there are more and more women having their time and exploring the world of solo traveling.

2 Likes

Hi @MissChef. What a great topic / article! Thanks for sharing it. I too travel quite a bit without my husband. We initially started traveling this way due to his seasonal job as a tour director. But, for many of the reasons discussed in the article, we’ve both found we like to go on separate adventures in addition to adventures together. It’s the mix that makes our relationship work so well now that we’re not tied down to office jobs.

We love our lifestyle, although we do find that many people have trouble understanding why we choose to live this way. But that doesn’t bother us. We live our way. They live their way. All’s good as long as everyone is happy.

Thanks again for sharing this and starting this topic :grinning:

6 Likes

I love this topic! PreCovid my spouse and I sometimes did solo trips. His were often work related, mine were more getting away from it all kind of “quests.” I joined as petowner, but recently combined my membership. When I combined, I thought I’d mostly be traveling alone to get away from my “normal” routine and get back to solo traveling. I’ve got an upcoming sit doing just that. As it’s been a while, I’m a little nervous – not about the pet part – but about travelling solo again. I’m also looking forward to it. Of course, I also expect to do some sits with my spouse, but the beauty of the solo sit is I don’t also have to plan around pet care for my cats! And I will get a lot of “me” time!

8 Likes

My husband and I’ve been together for more than three decades and I’ve traveled solo plenty. He’s not much of a traveler. At various times, I’ve had more vacation time as well.

I’ve also gone abroad on assignment for months or taken jobs across the country while he’s stayed behind to watch the home front, tie up moving details, wind down our real estate, etc.

Besides vacations and pet- and home-sitting, I’ve done trips when I’ve been invited to speak or consult and I’ve tacked on solo sightseeing, like in Morocco and the U.K. That’s less necessary nowadays, because more companies and conferences have gone virtual since the pandemic.

I’ve never cooked. The only things I make are fondue and cocktails. The good thing about never learning stuff you don’t want to do: No one expects you to do it, LOL.

As @Karen_E says: Live the life that works for you and ignore opinions that don’t matter. No one will ever know better than you what makes you happy, even if they’re well intentioned.

7 Likes

Oh what a great topic woman!
I began my solo travels in 1979 when I was 23. Back then it was for me a necessity.
Since then, I have traveled alone more often than not and could never understand concerns verbalized by family and good intentioned friends. Also struggled to comprehend when women expressed their fears or comments of “I could never do that”.
For me it just became a normal part of my life, my way of being. Traveling with others then became a test of patience, understanding and acceptance of others. Even family :flushed:
I was a force to be reckoned with :rofl:. Back then most women just didn’t do that, at least not in my circles.
Now, well now the comments are just, “that’s Amparo” and I am very Ok with her.
:smiley::100::fire:

10 Likes

I travel a lot without my husband, solo traveling took me away from my newly acquired home base and other half for 6 months in 2022 … and quite a few occasions in 2023 in fact we’ve turned the tables as he traveled constantly with work, often alone ,while we were living around the world. I would find myself alone in India, Africa, Vietnam and many other places … this is my time now … :slightly_smiling_face:

I pet sit back to back while working remotely and after years of doing for others find being in my own space with only myself to think about relaxing and yes liberating.

As a family we are all content, the children think it’s cool … Mum’s “escape” although they do expect a steady stream of gifts and my response is “I’ve been to work, not on vacation”

Similar to @Karen_E there are many who really don’t understand the why or even the how of the way we live … one dear friend secretly wishes she had the opportunity to spread her independent wings and perhaps she will one day … I hope she does.

We are all different and as Karen says

Thank you @MissChef for taking the leap and starting this topic …

10 Likes

A bit further down the line, when the boys are grown up and independent, I shall join the ranks of the solo woman travellers!

6 Likes

In a 24 hour period, I wonder how many times I hear “mom” or “honey”. I do love it…the first 20 times in a day. But by the 100th, I dream of running away so yes, traveling solo does sound appealing. But I do remind myself how fortunate we are to travel the country and now the world starting this Aug. and experience amazing places together. But one day when they are out of high school, I look forward to both couple/solo travel.

1 Like

Me and my girlfriends plan getaway trips all the time. They are also married or in serious relationships. I think it’s healthy to take time away from your significant other, plus it’s nice because then I can trust my partner will take good care of our dog (a reason why we’ve only had six sits in almost 2 yrs.)
I have also taken solo trips. I went to Istanbul by myself last year - I do have an old friend there, which helps with the language barrier :laughing:
A few years ago, I also flew to Bozeman, Montana, with some friends, then took the train back to Chicago by myself and met some wonderful people. One couple I sat across from in the train’s cafe reminded me of a good quote, but I can’t remember the exact words or who they were by, but it went something like “travel with others, to know people; travel alone to know yourself.”

6 Likes

Oh, yes…

My partner and I have been together for eighteen years, and for the last ten we’ve both worked mostly at home. I first said yes to sitting for a friend because I recognised I was beginning to forget who I was…

My partner and I now travel AND work AND sit together, and most of the time it’s fine, we make a good team. But I still find frequent solo sits essential: I adore stretching out into the physical and metaphorical extra space. The highlights of my last two years have been three week solo sits in the Welsh mountains Bliss :smiling_face: It’s good to be back with him too, though it takes a while to adjust! :wink:

7 Likes

I travel solo all the time. My partner of over 10 years comes with me sometimes, but he is very understanding of my solo trips too.
I grew up as an only child and I have always been very independent. Before pet sitting, I travelled solo a lot too and while I mostly loved it, sometimes it got lonely. Now with pets for company, the loneliness part is gone for good! :heart_eyes:

6 Likes

When traveling solo, the best thing is doing exactly what you want, without considering anyone else’s interests or preferences at all. The more I do that, the less interested I am in traveling with others. It helps to be happy with your own company and to have high comfort in solving your own challenges and dealing with unknowns, which are tough for many folks.

Sometimes, I’ll meet up with friends while traveling, but even then, I do it only with women who are independent — they don’t need to be with me most of the time and don’t need me to show them around. Like I went to the Mideast for weeks and met up with a friend for two days, then she went back to doing her own traveling. Or years ago, I traveled with a friend for a week or two and we’d spend time on our own, doing stuff solo all day and mtg up for dinner.

In my circles, it’s not at all unusual for women to travel alone. I worked in news for decades, where women were reporters, producers, video journalists or war correspondents, for instance. Since they did so much on the fly and solo, leisure travel alone is a cinch.

My first job out of college, I moved far from everyone I knew. That was in ye olde days, pre-internet. My third job, I moved abroad by myself and my husband followed months later, likewise pre-internet. Nowadays, I find things a cinch by comparison, because of tech and the accessibility of info. And you’re rarely unable to reach someone close.

For nearly the past decade, I’ve worked in the startup / tech world, where many of us telecommute, as well as have plenty of control over our own schedules. And many of us have generous paid time off, including sabbaticals. Among such folks, many travel alone at various points. It’s not at all unusual, wasn’t even pre-pandemic.

7 Likes

Hi @Maggie8K thank you for a great contribution to this interesting topic …

I emigrated to Canada on my own, with an 18 month old son (perhaps not a strictly solo traveller :wink:) in the early '70’s and yes pre-internet.

Calls to the UK had to be pre booked and cost most of a month’s salary if you ignored the beeps which counted down just how long you’d been talking for … working remotely was a telephone, the mail man and a paper diary but the upside was when the office closed, it closed no 24 hour connectivity, we did actually talk to people and sleep. :wink:

Thank you for sharing your story.

8 Likes

I’m a solo traveller…a. because I like it that way…b. I’m on my own​:grin::sweat_smile::grin:

6 Likes

It is better to travel solo than with friends. Still, I also think there’s something special about traveling with other women (if they can travel well). I’m not talking about spring break girl trips, but exploring a city together - museums, restaurants, cooking classes.

For my 40th bday last winter, I took my closest friends to Mexico City with me, and it was one of the most gratifying experiences I’ve ever had. We even ran into Trevor Noah (twice!) and chatted with him while we all waited to get into the Museum of Anthropology. I could have gone alone or with my partner, but I’m glad I went with my friends. I also planned the whole itinerary.

I worked as a photojournalist in my 20s. And did find that the best people to travel with either worked in media (tv producers, correspondents, photojournalists, publishing) or were tech nomads. People with journalism careers know to travel lightly, smartly, and independently.

I’ve lived in the U.S. for a long time. Still, I always credit my fearlessness and high altitude tolerance to being from Guatemala and my photojournalism background to packing light. Two weekends ago, I went to SF for a long weekend with one of my friends who is a radio producer, and all we took was a backpack - and yes, we cleaned up and changed clothes. We wore leggings the entire weekend. :sweat_smile:

4 Likes

I started solo traveling in my teens and have no intention of stopping, although, now as a mom to a little one I find it much harder to get away. I’ve already taken my daughter on two flights just her and I and have another small trip planned with just her (granted I will have some help once at our destination) and I’ll finally be going on a girls trip. It’ll truly be some time before I can return to solo travel but for now my daughter is a forcing me to see travel in a whole new amazing way. Everything happens slowly and we end up staying a lot closer to our lodging which I had never been keen to do before. I hope all of our travels encourages her to find her own adventures as she grows and a boldness to see and know more of our world.

7 Likes

Yes this! I feel so lucky to have a few close girlfriends that share the same travel philosophy as I do. And OMG you ran into Trevor Noah!! Was this when he had his first taco :joy:

1 Like

Wow, emigrating as a single mom would be daunting, especially pre-internet. My hat’s off to you!

Frankly, I think being a single parent anywhere would be challenging. I look at two-parent families — those I know personally and those folks I manage — and I admire how much juggling they do nonstop. Makes me tired just observing.

That’s partly why I don’t understand why telecommuting didn’t become a thing decades ago. The ability to work remotely adds so much to quality of life, especially as a parent, I’d imagine.

2 Likes

Part of the reason I don’t like to travel with others: I don’t plan, whether for groups or myself. I wing things, depending on my mood and the weather on any given day. That means if I decide to lounge around all day and not do anything, I want the freedom to. I don’t care if I see all the sights or not.

In my younger days, I was willing to compromise more. Nowadays, not so much.

I’ve never done a “spring break” type trip, because I grew up on a tropical island — to me, that’s super boring. I get that that’s totally relaxing and enjoyable to many folks, though.

4 Likes