Stranded with kids after last-minute sit change — need advice

[Els]

@Mommy We have been full-time petsitting via THS for 5 years, so it is definitely possible, but yes, nothing is 100% sure when looking after animals. The animal might die before your arrival, the home owners might get seriously ill and not be able to go on holiday anymore, but the same goes for home owners: sitters might have an emergency back home and therefore not be able to honour the sit. So, no, if you’re looking for 100% security, then this is not the lifestyle/holiday for you.

Like you, we were let down by owners in Malta, having bought flight tickets and everything. Therefore, we tend not to do sits in countries/places where there are very few sits. (e.g. Greek islands) unless we are financially able to support ourselves there, in case the sit gets canceled. We are supposed to go to Kenya for a 5 week sit at Christmas and fingers crossed, it all works out. But in case it doesn’t, we upgraded to the premier membership so we might get some financial compensation and we will see it as a holiday and are saving now to be able to afford it.

Especially with children, you need to have a financial plan B. I wish you all the best and hope it’ll work out in the end !

[PVGemini]

To close the loop, The Home Exchange member in Cyprus responded immediately today, explaining that he will be gone the last week of August, so this family could potentially stay in his apartment during that week.

His extra bedroom is small, with a small bed, and he cannot accommodate more than 2 people in his extra room, while he is home. So unfortunately, this will not work out, but it was worth a try!

Looks like Olga has made a decision to return home. Sounds like you had a fun trip, and August in Estonia is likely the nicest time of year. Make the most of it!

@Cuttlefish

[ExploreDreamDiscover]

@Mommy

I don’t think you mentioned this in your OP

@Mommy

we had several conversations where she said it would absolutely be okay for us to stay at her place if anything changed. She even mentioned that she might return home for a few days during the sit — and that we could stay together for five days or so, and that would also be totally fine.

I think the HO offered reassurance that you would not get stuck. I understand her distress and worry but after a few days she should have had you come to the house even if she wasn’t ready to leave yet. Even if was just until you could make other arrangements.

[ExploreDreamDiscover]

“Knowing that there are no real guarantees, no contracts, no insurance — and that someone can just suddenly leave you outside”

@Mommy

this is dangerous

The kind of guarantees you are hoping for would come with a very expensive membership. I don’t think they exist.

THS is clear about what is offered. I don’t think it’s very dangerous and think it is much safer than using Facebook or an unorganized platform. People using THS for nomad travel seem to understand that they are taking some risk and plan accordingly. I don’t put myself in a dangerous or financially devastating situation. Putting things in prospective, I know absolute guarantees that I won’t be disappointed don’t exist. There is alway the possibility of something very unfortunate happening to me or the HO. I live with that reality in mind.

[catscatscats24]

How awful. As someone who sits with their family i really feel for you. Its frightening and I would be very upset if this happened to us.

However, you could try the host a sister network, or some of the Facebook home exchange groups. I imagine there will be someone who can help….

[kimshady]

Paying for a THS membership is similar to paying for a subscription on Bumble, Tinder etc. You are paying to have access to the platform only that’s it nothing else. Just as Bumble or Tinder cannot be held accountable if your matches do not result in marriage neither can THS be held accountable if a HO decides to cancel a sit at the last minute. Bottom line do not take sits in destinations you cannot afford to pay for a hotel and a last minute flight back home. It is upon us sitters to ensure we have money for accommodations and transportation at the ready in the event the sit does not work out.

[sandydandy]

The stress you’ve undergone is horrible and beyond unfortunate! But I have to completely disagree with you about the lack of support and the indignation you’ve expressed with the site ( a paying site)! I was on my second sit last year when things went sideways. Long story short, the wretched homeowner came home three weeks before sit was to end and I was out on my bum! Always one to land on my feet, I found another sit which was fantastic and only ended up paying for an air b and b ( which serendipitously ended up in my making a new friend) for 5 nights. The support staff at THS were very supportive and were prepared to kick in the funds for my unhoused days, and generally were very helpful during the stressful sit too. I didn’t use their $cuz I didn’t want to stay within 20 miles of the original sit, which was fine with me. That’s where plan B comes in. No need to feel like I was in danger or homeless at any point, despite the disastrous situation! THS came through with flying colors and to think this is a dangerous situation is not taking all the factors mentioned above by others into account. Good luck to you and I’d advise you not to jump into another adventure without fully understanding the platform, as Maggie and Silversitters mentioned.

[systaran]

@sandydandy

The support staff at THS were very supportive and were prepared to kick in the funds for my unhoused days, and generally were very helpful during the stressful sit too. I didn’t use their $cuz I didn’t want to stay within 20 miles of the original sit, which was fine with me.

THS was willing to kick in funds? That’s new. Or are you referring to the cancellation insurance that will reimburse alternate accommodations (only for those with a premium plan)?

[sandydandy]

Yes, the premium membership fees (which are not much) were more than covered by the offer to pay for accommodations which would have to be within 20 miles of my original (cancelled) sit. And the support on the phone was ongoing and comforting to me during the unraveling of this dreadful sit! Can’t thank them enough!

[systaran]

@sandydandy thanks for the clarification. The cancellation insurance it only for those with a premium membership and it sounds like the OP here does not have that membership level. The insurance does require the sitter to pay for the alternate accommodations first and then file a claim for reimbursement. So, it’s still important for sitters to ensure they have available money to pay out in an emergency situation. Glad you got good support from THS.

[Maggie8K]

@Mommy

But if the conclusion is that it’s only safe to sit in those few well-populated regions, then what’s the point of supporting or growing this global network at all?

Should we just stop traveling, stop participating, stop believing in the idea behind it?

Everyone has different resources — various folks can afford different scenarios. THS doesn’t offer cancellation coverage beyond premium, so sit at your own risk, if you decide to continue.

Personally, I wouldn’t take sits where I can’t afford a fallback plan.

[BonnyinBrighton]

I feel that you’re incredibly disappointed which is understandable- you imagined a fantastic summer trip for you and your children, so it’s a huge blow. I think it’s the sheer disappointment of losing or being denied that promised/imagined trip that’s maybe clouding your view of what’s going on here?

The subscription fee simply provides access to listings all in one place not scattered across FB and without any facility to check past reviews…. and that’s it, nothing more. Beyond this it’s down to you. Having done a basic risk analysis and put in place some mitigation it is the sitter’s responsibility and nobody else’s. No sitter is entitled to a sit if the HO cancels… it’s damned annoying of course but Plan B mitigations come into play. Hugely frustrating and possibly expensive alternatives are the result of a high risk strategy seeking to gain free accommodation for a summer of cat sitting. Yes the HO has strung you along, and yes opening a dispute and ending it all more quickly by cancelling would’ve in hindsight been far better but you hung on keeping on hoping that it would come good, and it didn’t. You made these decisions yourself. Many of us sitters accept these risks, others simply can’t accept them…. it’s not THS’s fault though.

[Mommy]

I’d like to kindly clarify again that the purpose of this forum thread is not to shame, attack, or blame anyone — not the homeowner, not THS, not other sitters. The aim is to draw attention to a systemic weakness that, if addressed, could help protect us all in the future.

This isn’t about pointing fingers — it’s about identifying areas where the platform could evolve to offer more security and predictability. Many of us joined THS because we believe in the values of mutual respect, trust, and responsibility. And many members — myself included — come from places where we expect a certain standard of accountability.

We’re living in a civilised, interconnected world, and these discussions are important. This isn’t funny or trivial for those who have been left stranded or significantly affected by last-minute cancellations. It’s real life, and it has real consequences — especially for families, single parents, and those planning travel long in advance.

That’s why I believe it’s worth speaking up. Because improving the system benefits everyone, not just a few.

Why should we simply “accept the risks,” suffer inconvenience, and constantly scramble for Plan Bs — when there’s real potential to improve the platform and offer a fairer level of protection for both sitters and homeowners?

Here are a few constructive suggestions based on practices used by other platforms:
1. A small shared insurance fund — perhaps a $10 yearly contribution from each member could help compensate sitters for last-minute cancellations.
2. A clear agreement outlining what happens when a sit is cancelled less than 24 hours before the start date — especially when the sitter is already en route or on location.
3. Enforcement mechanisms — for example, a homeowner (or sitter) who repeatedly breaks agreements could be temporarily blocked from applying for sits or listing their home until the issue is resolved.

These aren’t punitive suggestions — they’re aimed at strengthening trust and ensuring mutual responsibility. I believe THS has built a fantastic community, and with a few systemic tweaks, it could be even more resilient and supportive for everyone involved.

[BonnyinBrighton]

Mostly we accept the risks because the annual membership fee is very low. It’s a balance isn’t it? I believe in resilience building in people rather than the system in this case anyway. It’s based on trust and yes sometimes things go awry like last year when I needed major surgery and had to cancel x3 confirmed sits (they all found other sitters as I gave plenty of notice). There are multiple unique situations that arise where nobody is to blame, and either HO or sitters have to scramble to make other arrangements. And yes a few folk are a bit flakey and unreliable but soon get found out via the Review system. And yes it’s dammed annoying if as a sitter it’s your honest review after a poor experience that alerts others in the future… on the whole the Premium option seems to offer a little protection for last minute cancellations. THS is pretty simple as an idea and works pretty well for the majority, it’s risky of course, but it’s cheap and offers huge opportunities for travel and experiences to those with the right mindset to cope with uncertainty.

[Silversitters]

@Mommy

It’s so unfortunate that this has happened on your first sit and it must be very stressful for you. We had a sit curtailed on our 5th sit and it was stressful to deal with at the time . However we persevered with THS and have now done 35 sits .

@Mommy

identifying areas where the platform could evolve to offer more security and predictability.

What suggestions do you have for this ?

Unexpected events happen and sits occasionally get cancelled for genuine reasons . Some reasons that a sit getscancelled are sitter or host having a serious accident, a natural disaster , a bereavement or pet injured, unwell or going missing . The platform offers a sit cancellation plan if you upgrade to Premium membership. We used this successfully when a trip was curtailed because the host had a serious accident and had to return home early .

Not everyone wants to pay for the upgrade or thinks it’s worthwhile and many would prefer make their own arrangements if a sit gets cancelled . So it’s offered as an optional extra .

Out of 35 sits , we have had 2 sits curtailed because of serious illness / accident where hosts had to return home early . Whatever the reason it can be stressful to have to change your plans , which is why so many experienced sitters on this forum recommend that we all have a Plan B in mind before it happens .

Any other suggestions about what could be done to mitigate the risks are appreciated .

[Els]

@Mommy

it’s about identifying areas where the platform could evolve to offer more security and predictability.

But this isn’t the platform’s responsibility! The platform just connects people. You pay the platform to have the option to find possible sits and that’s it. It is the responsibility of the sitter to accept a sit, with all the possible risks that come with it…

[Garfield]

The platform does have some of your suggestions.

The premium membership gives you a possibility to get either pet care or housing reimbursed if a sit falls through on short notice. As with any insurance it is super important to follow the steps to be reimbursed

Tried & tested process for premium insurance claim

A member can get a warning and be kicked off the platform. To be able to do this, it must be filed a «member dispute» (those words must be used for a THS investigation to be started). If she has gotten a warning before, for instance, your dispute might get her kicked off. But a claim is not enough, a member must ofc document their accusations in some ways.

Listings can also be reported if they are in breach of terms. I’ve done so several times. For instance aggressive animals, third parties on the property, using THS for business purposes.

Again - I think you very unfairly was put in a horrible situation, and your host had said she would house you anyway originally and she should have done so. I think many members would have felt an obligation to help out and done it regardless. If not for the full period as it was very long, at least until you got things sorted. I don’t think that was ok at all. If it was my sitters I wouldn’t have done that.

But the terms of THS is that both you and any other member can pull out and be free of your commitment. I think this is also important for a voluntary trade, and that really doesn’t do much difference. Because how can you force someone to sit for you or house you if they don’t want to?

As this topic goes on, I wonder also why «a single cat lady» chose a family. Single cat ladies often choose single ladies. As I have brought my children to sits for families with children, when I think of it. Maybe that could be kind of a «key» going forward. Choosing likeminded hosts. Regardless - the host is the no. 1 factor for things going south or going well.

But in your case it seems you had reason to believe that several options were covered, and the host didn’t follow up on her own words. That must have been really horrible for you, and especially as a newbie with kids.

[Mommy]

Of course, I fully understand that everything on this platform is based on voluntary agreement. But I just want to share an example from my own experience, based on many years of travel and living in different countries.

For instance, if I book a manicure appointment and then cancel it less than 24 hours before, the salon will usually refuse to accept me again in the future — just like that. And if they do, it’s only after I pay in full in advance, including a cancellation fee. Because the time slot the technician kept open for me was completely lost. This kind of policy is very common — not just in the beauty industry but in many types of service-based businesses.

That’s why I believe a similar system could help protect both sides here. Because right now, this is what’s happening: the sit is simply marked as “completed.” I cannot leave any public feedback to reflect what actually happened. The sitter (homeowner) just stopped responding — no reply to any of my messages, which I find quite disrespectful.

If this platform calls TRUSTED, than sitter and host should be HUMAN in every situation.

[Silversitters]

There is the option to raise a member dispute if someone has breached the terms of service.

However a cancellation ( albeit last minute) because the pet had gone missing would meet the definition of extraordinary circumstances.

Also , if I have understood correctly , the host paid 50% of your interim accommodation costs for your family. This is above and beyond what is required by THS . I’m sure very much appreciated by you given the unfortunate circumstances.

@Mommy

we found very budget-friendly accommodation together, and agreed to split the cost 50/50

[Mommy]

First she asked to extend on my own! For two more days! Than she asked to extend for 3 more days , ok, but here I asked her any guarantee that finally sit will happen , like what for I am waiting ? We split it yes , it was kinda a green flag to wait for sit and trust. Also I was asking maybe to save money and we can stay at her place and figure out what to do and how to be ? Maybe to look for the cat together. As we were discussing before like emergency case…

After this 3 days I asked her : how it’s going ? What we do? And she quit responding with any solutions… just expressed that she is not feeling well and dissapierd (

At list it’s polite to respond. And be honest. Not to give any hope …

And yes, there are exceptional cases! For example, an Airbnb booking is normally non-refundable — but they refunded me in an emergency situation: the death of the person who made the reservation.

Here, however, there is complete lack of accountability and no protection whatsoever! And with the growth of the platform, this will likely lead to even more unfortunate situations — and possibly even fraud.