Unacceptable - HO has a friend staying at sit

Just arrived at a sit and the HO casually tells me that she has a friend staying! I’m pretty unhappy about this, I like to sit alone and I like to make myself at home as if the house was my home. The HO has said that her friend can go and stay elsewhere but I feel upset at being put in the position of turning her out. This has never happened before, it’s really unacceptable :weary:

(edited by Forum team to clarify post title to attract more replies :slight_smile: )

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Agreed. Are the HOs new to the platform?

As you rightly say. it is unacceptable. There is no need to feel upset, explain to the home host that Trustedhousesitters do not allow third parties to be in the house during your stay so their guest will have to leave.

Here is the official information if you want to show it to them


Hi @MissisE the homeowner should not have waited until you arrived to give you this information. Making it very awkward for you .

As the HO has said the friend can go and stay somewhere else it sounds like they knew that it was against THS T&Cs to have a third party staying . Stand firm and say yes your friend needs to go and stay elsewhere during the sit .

If you feel uncomfortable about raising this with the homeowner yourself you can ask member services for help .

Use live chat in the Help section and ask to “speak to a human” .


Depending on your backup plan, you could keep things friendly and let them choose:

  1. The friend stays and takes over the sit. You leave.
  2. You stay and do the sit as agreed, without the friend, whose presence violates THS terms.

That’s what I did with a host who told me months after our agreement that her grown son would be moving back home, overlapping my sit. She choose No. 1 and offered to share covering my travel costs.


I have told the HO that I will honour the sit but the friend has to go. I’m shaking. It’s awful that they put me in this position. They are rather grand and entitled!


If that’s what you’ve decided, try to make the most of the sit and then write your review, being factual about what they did. It would be hard for them to attract other sitters in the future if they knew that these hosts are untrustworthy and disrespectful.


I think they think I’m staff….

I totally agree you shouldn’t feel bad about the host’s friend being asked to leave and I also understand how stressful it must be for you. Others have made some helpful suggestions as to how to deal with this in the here and now.

However I do think THS could do more to prevent this in the future. I genuinely beieve that some hosts don’t know or don’t remember the requirements especially if they use the site irregularly. There are some obvious opportunities for THS to remind hosts of their responsibilities. For example as I’ve mentioned countless times THS could have a drop down menu when sits are listed asking owners to tick a checklist including “there will be no one else staying in my home during the sit”.

I also understand that as well as the message us sitters get along the lines “get ready for your sit” THS also send something similar to hosts. This could include a reminder of the key requirements for the sit that hosts need to abide by.

Also at each renewal a similar message could be sent out along the lines of “We do hope you’ll renew your membership, just to remind you of …”.


:clap:Well done @MissisE for standing your ground and sticking to the terms on which you agreed to sit for them - that is no third parties present.

It was totally unfair of the HOs to change the terms of the sit and not to inform you until your arrival by expecting you to be ok with a third party staying at the home.

If I was in your shoes I would probably inform THS member services about the situation (even though it’s been resolved ) so that there is a written record and in case there is any pushback or negativity from the HO.

E-mail support@memberservices.com


The guest has agreed to go, obviously this has been extremely awkward all round, I’m still shaking :cry:


Hi @MissisE

I’m so sorry to hear this has happened. Thanks to @Colin for confirming so quickly that Trusted Housesitters don’t allow third parties during a stay.

As @Silversitters has mentioned, please do reach out to our Membership Services team about this, and as @Maggie8K mentions please mention this as part of your factual review of the sit.

Thank you to everyone who popped on here so quickly to support OP and give them advice on how to handle this situation.

Take care,



Thanks everyone for the emotional support. It’s an awful situation. I feel quite shaken and obvs feel really mean but it’s just not on….


@MissisE there is no reason for you to feel mean .

The HO should not have invited a guest to stay knowing that they had an agreement with you already - that their home would be vacant for the duration of your stay whilst you take care of their home (and pets ?) for free.

If any one should feel guilty it is maybe the HO for putting both their friend and you in an awkward situation. However, with the issue now resolved (the third party has agreed to go and you have agreed to stay) HOs are probably enjoying their holiday by now and you are entitled to enjoy the rest of your holiday without any guilt too.

I hope there are some sweet pets there with you ?


@MissisE you’ve done absolutely nothing wrong. Don’t feel bad at all. They made it that way. Best wishes to you.


The HOs did apologise, I think they think I’m being a bit of a diva! The friend hates me….


I have an ancient Jack Russel to look after, Gertie. She is wearing a cone and is covered in sores and scabs after recent treatment. This wansnt mentioned either :roll_eyes:

The upside is that the house is the most beautiful house I’ve ever been in. A glorious Georgian pile in Bath :star_struck:


No, they have had quite a few sitters. The house is amazing, the dog requires little looking after. I think they feel that I should be grateful :woman_shrugging:t2:

@MissisE as they say “THIS👏 RIGHT👏 HERE👏.”

Something else to mention in your review ?

Hopefully you’ll only have positive surprises for the rest of your stay ?!