Husband and I just had a sitter who was a bit ‘off’. We interviewed her over FaceTime and she seemed great. Her cousin dropped her off and seemed happy to have dropped her off with her stuff. I didn’t see the stuff she dragged along with her to this sit - various suitcases and two large black trash bags filled with who knows what - until I went out the back door. She was so confused on what to do with her stuff and definitely appeared overwhelmed. She blamed low blood sugar. I told her she could stay in our granny unit so that she could ‘figure it out.’ She immediately started doing laundry, which is what was in the trash bags. She claims she’s a writer and stated she would appreciate the time to sit with the dogs to do some writing. Looking back, my husband now thinks that the ‘writer’ description is code for unemployed and homeless. I told my husband I didn’t feel right about her, and he let me know he had some of his Jiu Jitsu colleagues at the ready to come rescue the dogs if needed. Her messages to us over the time she was with the dogs and in our house, didn’t raise any alarms. She told us beforehand that she would have to leave at noon to get to her next sit, and we were fine with that. We came home and the first sign of ‘Oh this isn’t good’ was piles of dog poop on the patio by the back door. We had to clean all of that up before we could enter the house. We open the door to the house and I immediately smell urine. Found it, a very soaked mat by the other back door. There is a long list of other stuff, but the DOGS WERE ALIVE and happy to see us. We didn’t give her the best rating but not the worst. Looking back we should have raked her over the coals! Anyway, her review of us…..we are facsists, abusers of THS, and have inside and outside surveillance. There are no inside or outside cameras; we don’t even have a Ring! I think she suffers from paranoia, and she probably thought our outside motion lights were cameras. Actually, we have them to scare off the occasional raccoons. Anyway, looking back I should have trusted my gut and told her to ‘about face’ and leave our home. But I want to know how others have dealt with a situation where your ‘spidey-senses’ were telling you something is WRONG with this sitter. Also, we failed to realize that the reviews she had listed were not THS reviews but reviews supposedly submitted by other individuals she has sat for. We were her first THS sit.
Hi @RozJ 
I think there’s a difference between judging someone for being unconventional and recognising genuine red flags.
Travelling with lots of luggage or saying she’s a writer wouldn’t concern me on its own. Plenty of wonderful sitters travel with everything they own or work remotely. But arriving flustered and overwhelmed, then leaving your dogs and home in the condition you described, paints a very different picture.
I’ve learned that if my instincts are telling me something isn’t right, I don’t ignore them anymore. It doesn’t mean I assume the worst about someone, but I do pay attention. If I genuinely didn’t feel comfortable leaving my pets in someone’s care, I’d rather have an awkward conversation and cancel the sit before leaving than spend my trip worrying.
Hindsight has a way of making everything seem obvious. At the time, most of us are trying to be welcoming and give people the benefit of the doubt. Unfortunately, sometimes that kindness comes back to bite us.
One thing I’d add for anyone new to THS is to look carefully at the sitter’s profile. Personal references can be helpful, but verified THS reviews from completed sits usually tell you much more about what to expect.
she does indeed sound terrible.
but…
Reviews are not listed by sitters, genuine reviews come from THS pet owners and are listed by THS. You didn’t do due diligence by looking for any of these actual Reviews. It would have been obvious that this was to be her first THS sit.
It can be difficult for both hosts and sitters to back out of unsuitable sit arrangements discovered at the point of arrival , unless they have a back up plan in place.
The best way to avoid this situation is to create an accurate listing that dissuades anyone unsuitable from applying in the first place.
Your listing could be tweaked to make this amount of dog care responsibilities clearer .
For example the first thing in the responsibility section is that dogs can be left alone for up to 6 hours - this is something that will appeal to sitters and reflects the mutual exchange concept of THS . You also list local attractions which is great - and you offer free passes to an attraction 26 miles away .This is something that would definitely attract a sitter because it shows you have thought about what they can enjoy during their stay .
However , the responsibilities section later states walks are at 8:30 , followed by breakfast , noon and 4 pm followed by dinner .
So the gap between those responsibilities only leaves around 3 - 3.5 hours which doesn’t leave much time for the sitter to leisurely travel to and enjoy the attractions 26 miles away .
(Maybe this was possible before you had Ashi)?
I suggest a rewrite of all sections of the listing that accurately reflects the current situation for example remove all the attractions that it will not be possible for a sitter to visit. ( or perhaps for long sits offer to have a paid dog sitter come once or twice a week so that the THS sitter can go out for longer ).
Also it’s important for hosts and sitters to have a back up plan that can be implemented if the sit has to be cancelled because “something is off “.
This is why it’s so important to have a video chat via WhatsApp/Zoom. I wonder if this happened prior to confirmation of the sitter, in which case the HOs could have backed out at a far earlier stage.
Hindsight connects up the dots of course, and the HOs will have learnt a few lessons from this experience. The main ones being:
*f2f video conversations prior to confirmation of a sitter to check suitability
*understanding the difference between personal references which get a new sitter started versus actual THS references from other HOs
*ensuring clarity in the listing details
*the importance of writing a factual review to protect future HOs
*a back up plan for 24-48 hours enabling maybe a new last minute THS sitter to be engaged
Presumably this sitter is now on a second THS sit causing similar issues there too? Hopefully those HOs will also write a transparent review.
Two poor reviews will mean this sitter will be finished sitting on this site….
You can reply to her review of you, no time limit on that. Just state the facts you’ve given here, calmly and without emotion. Going forward, always look for the official THS reviews, read between the lines on them, as for the references, anyone can write them, including her.
The owner says she ‘interviewed’ her over FaceTime before the sit
THS is basically just a matching site and it’s up to both sitters and pet parents to work out what constitutes a good match for them. The first step is for hosts to write a clear and accurate listing to attract sitters who feel able to fulfill the requirements whilst also enjoying their time away. It seems that, in this case, both sitter and HO have failed in their due diligence.
i’ve taken a look at the OP’s listing and couldn’t agree more with @Silversitters . However, I find the wording in the responsibilities section in the current listing - which may potentially have been amended since the experience with the last sitter? - is completely off-putting, and there’s still an indication that the dogs can be left alone for 6 hours, when the reality seems to be that the HO is really looking for someone to stay home all day or take all 3 dogs with them whenever they go out (judging by previous reviews and the extensive list which falls under the heading ’ If you DON’T like the following, this sit is NOT right for you.'). It’s really important to be clear about responsibilities and expectations so that sitters can make an informed choice about whether to apply, but a more positive, informative and welcoming attitude would go a long way, here.
So, the OP had reservations about this sitter when she arrived, but decided still to leave her 3 dogs in this person’s care. I presume - and would hope - the reference to the husband’s martial arts colleagues was just a tongue-in-cheek comment?
The OP doesn’t state what time they themselves arrived home, but that there were piles of dog poop on the patio and urine on the back door mat. This sit is for 3 dogs, the listing states they are still house training Ashi and a previous sitter has mentioned in her review that Ashi needs toileting on a strict schedule, also that she has previously eaten her way out of her fabric crate.
At the end of the day, it seems you’ve both messed up by not properly assessing each other:
This sitter had no THS verified reviews and 3 external references. You took a chance on her and it would seem you weren’t especially displeased with the care she provided:
You subsequently left her a review, allocating 4 stars in every category.
On the other hand, this sitter has left you a scathing review, which I suspect has prompted this post?
The sitter hasn’t done herself any favours in writing such a negative review for her first hosts, since it indicates she didn’t properly assess compatibility. Likewise, I don’t think the OP has come out very well in positing a judgemental response which contradicts their original review .
This has also been included in the emotional response to the sitter’s review, and it’s nasty. It would deter me from applying for any future sits listed.
We can only give feedback according to what you’ve written here and by checking out your listing and reading other reviews, but it all just underlines the fact that we’ve all got to take some responsibility for the sit/sitter choices we make.
Excellent feedback, impressed by your observation.
Just read the review and your response. This is why both hosts and sitters should wait a week before they write a response to a bad review. Your response to their review does not help you. If you can delete it and write a different response, I would highly recommend that. Remember your response will be seen by mostly potential sitters and you wrote it as if hosts will see it. Hosts will mostly just see what you wrote about the sitter on the sitters page. You can start with for a response that this was not a good match that you unfortunately felt early on. That if you look at our numerous 5 star reviews you will see the sitter’s one star review we feel is because this is her first sit and this type of arrangement does not fit who she is as a person. Sitters are a special breed and we appreciate the previous wonderful sitters we have had. I would take out all of your disparaging comments. Reading your response, I would never sit for you. Your response hurt you more than her words.
Looked at the listing and reviews. Sounds like a high-maintenance sit that many sitters would do well to avoid.
To be fair, THS’s presentation of References vs Reviews misleads hosts with newish sitters. The front page of a new sitter’s profile has a link to “Reviews” only. Not “Reviews and References” or “Reviews” or “References”. No heads up that you’re headed into 2 different categories. Once you get to “Reviews”, actual reviews are listed along with references. There have been plenty of examples on this forum of hosts missing the distinction. It takes some mistakes before hosts realize that necessary “due diligence” requires a skeptical view of how THS presents information as much as the information itself.
It’s hard to keep track of the changes THS has made to profile layout and content but I recall that “total THS sits” used to be listed on sitter profiles and there was a clear distinction between Reviews and References. That distinction has since been muddied and the number of sits is no longer displayed so there’s no telling if 10 positive reviews on a sitter’s profile were submitted by hosts against 10 sits or 100.
The evolution of THS’s sitter profiles feels intentionally misleading and now requires that members be suspicious of THS presented information rather than accepting it a face value. The necessity to be skeptical is SOP when dealing with corporations vs a real community but THS’s devolving transparency seems gratuitous and sneaky.
then I stand corrected. I did wonder why a pet owner the other day mentioned me having done 70 sits, when I have only done 64.
This is the first time I’ve used this forum, so I’m not sure where in the line up of comments my reply will fall.
She was our 15th sitter and all of those before her were great.
We have been tweaking the listing and will continue to do so. So thank you to those who’ve pointed out the inconsistencies.
We interviewed another sitter yesterday for an upcoming sit, and he asked to be paid for his sit since Ashi requires so much time. That is the first time that’s ever been asked!
The reason why I wrote the post was to see how others handled the ‘off spidey-sense’. Has anyone told the arrived sitter - NO, you must leave now and not take care of my pets?
Looking at this situation, my husband and I have been trying to figure out how we should have handled it. Would the best way have been telling her - You need to call your cousin right now and have him come pick you and your trash bags of stuff up.
If anyone did have to tell the sitter to leave, how did the situation end up?
Yes, Ashi has added a new level to the sit. She is such a sweet dog and a bit high maintenance, but everyday we look at her funny flat face she makes us laugh and we know that, unfortunately, she will not be with us long. In our hearts we believe she was dumped on the side of the road because of her health issues and probably her inability to be a safe breeding option. She isn’t spayed and cannot be because of her heart condition. We will just continue to keep her healthy and be by her side when her little heart can’t take it anymore.
@OnTheRoadAgain @RedLassie Another discrepancy is that when I look at my sitter profile, on the website the profile page shows the true count of my reviews only. On the app, the title Reviews includes my references - it’s a blended count of my reviews and references - no distinction between them. As I have many references, in truth the app significantly inflates my review count (no complaints from me 
). Then on the app, when I swipe through the entries, every entry (review or refererence) has the header title of Reviews & references. It’s in my favour, of course, but certainly deceiving, if the view for someone other than the sitter is the same.
I’m just going to address this one point. If this sitter applied (as opposed to you reaching out to him) then please report him to membership services (support@trustedhousesitters.com).
If you reached out to him and he said he only does sits like that as paid ones, then it’s not a violation of the Terms & Conditions.
Side comment: The use of the term interview is disliked by some sitters as it’s more of a chat session between equals, not an interview. I suggest you avoid using that word when communicating with sitters.
Given that you’ve been on the platform for a while and have had many sitters, I am surprised that you did not realize that the “references” were not THS reviews.
A previous sitter (not the subject of the OP) provided the details about Ashi’s care that you should include in the listing and describe in full to prospective sitters prior to offering the sit.
Sitters do need to know that Ashi is a high needs dog at this point. She is absolutely wonderful but needs a lot of care and medication on a strict schedule and toileting also on a strict schedule. Leaving her for more than a couple of hours is not really possible. Unfortunately, even leaving her to go to dinner resulted in her eating her way out of her own fabric crate and necessitated sleeping with her in my bed thereafter so that she would not damage the house.
Sorry but I think your sit should be a paid one, and that to this stage, you have taken advantage of the fact that you have a nice home in a beautiful and expensive part of the world.
I hope that you didn’t agree to pay for the sitter you spoke to yesterday - unless it was an arrangement not via Trusted Housesitters. THS sitters should not be asking for payment and, if they feel the tasks are too much for an unpaid sitter then they shouldn’t be applying. I hope you manage to find a suitable sitter, there are bound to be people who would embrace the needs of your dogs but these must be described comprehensively in your listing. I think it is very caring of you to have welcomed poorly, abandoned Ashi into your home for the last few months or even weeks of her life.
That sitter looks particularly ill-suited for THS. I’m surprised you left such a kind review, but I also get that it can be hard to deduct stars, especially when experiences have been so good.
I do think the response to the sitter’s review was not well thought out and may make future sitters pause more than the obviously-unhinged review itself. It’s always a good idea to let a few days pass so that any response can be calm, BRIEF, and devoid of personal assumptions.