Is this odd?

I sat for a HO with 6 cats a couple of months ago where one cat kept having seizures. I contacted the HO to ask how the cat was doing via whatsapp about a month ago but despite her being online most days according to whatsapp, I’ve not received a response.
I’d love an update on all the HO’s cat but especially the seizing cat.
Asking too much?

Don’t take it personally. Perhaps that cat has passed away, and it’s a pain point, that they aren’t ready or want to discuss.

On the other hand, some homeowners, view us as “staff” and don’t want to talk their personal life, & pets, or have a post-sit relationship.

You inquired, and that shows that you care. The homeowner me reach out to you eventually, or not? Who knows, but again don’t take it personally.


Maybe they’re not checking the app or email address you’re using. I sent something recently to past HO on WhatsApp (we’ve had a great relationship) but didn’t hear from them for a few weeks because even though we used WhatsApp during the sit, they weren’t checking regularly now.


It is possible the cat has passed. I would probably not respond right away and if too much time has passed by, I hate to admit this but I would feel like a jerk and too embarrassed to reply.

On the other hand, they might just not be great at responding to people they don’t have a close or daily relationship with. I’ve been on the end where I got ghosted by my last sitter even though I thought she was great. Seems odd but some people are just not into texting people they don’t know super well. As @MissChef mentioned, don’t take it personal.

It doesn’t seem odd to me, that people aren’t into post-sit communication. Some might not want a wide social circle, or have too big a social circle already! or too much life admin, or busy jobs, or large families… etc. And lots of new sits to arrange, send updates on…

Mostly we have pleasant encounters - and just occasionally, hosts we really click with, and want to stay in touch. Same in other areas of life!

A specific enquiry after a pet’s health is a bit different, but I agree with others: don’t take it personally @richten, though it’s kind that you asked.

I too recently had a similar experience.
We sat for a lovely host last summer in a gorgeous country manor house. The HO said personally, and in her review, she’d love us back and earlier this year she did invite us back but the dates were not a match. 2/3 months ago I happened to look at her listing and noticed one of her cute dogs was no longer pictured and also not mentioned. We both felt upset thinking he may well have passed away as he was elderly- though he still seemed top fit when we sat there. Anyway I wrote a very tactful caring message enquiring after him. I could see on Whatsapp the message was read next day but she never responded… I realise, now, that our msg may have come at a bad time- perhaps just too soon after his loss for her to be able to respond. :pray::crying_cat_face:

Don’t think it’s asking for too much. If they don’t reply, whatever their reason, that’s unfortunate.

I think some people are also just instinctively suspicious (no judgement, I am too) so they may be wary of someone contacting them out of the blue (albeit with a kind message) and wonder what the true motivation is. I wouldn’t take it personally, you did a nice thing and showed empathy and they are doing what is best for them.

If the cat has seizures, it may always have seizures, so there may not be an update to give you, so they may have perceived your message as simply you keeping in touch, touting for future sits.

Also, maybe your relationship with the HO isn’t that strong, that’s not a bad thing, you naturally bond with some HO’s more on a friendship level and others less so. The fact she’s been online means nothing! If a proper strong relationship didn’t form on that occasion, why would she respond? She may have thought you were great as a sitter, but that’s as far as it goes.

Let it go, you did a nice thing by contacting them, but maybe they just have other things going on, like normal life, their work, their pets, their family. That’s where their focus may be. They probably don’t have a problem with you, but don’t send another message to her unless she responds.

You are reading waaaaay too much into their non-response by posting this on here. It’s got into your head for absolutely no reason. I am guessing they gave you a good review, so let your paranoia go, everything is good, and focus on your next sit, not theirs.

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I think it’s difficult when we get attached to a pet, especially when we cared for them when they were ill: there are a million reasons why this home owner hasn’t replied to you, the most obvious being that they opened your message when they were in a hurry, meant to reply to you but forgot about it.
Don’t think automatically that the kitty passed away or that they are avoiding you. Maybe they are, and if they are avoiding you for a specific reason, I’d make peace with it and focus on the futur sits, but I can understand why it triggered you in the first place, as we develop different relationships with past pet parents: we might not always be on the same page regarding following up or keeping in touch, later on :hugs:

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I too would encourage them to let go of it, but I totally support them bringing it here to ask for other perspectives. We’re all different: one person’s paranoia is another’s sensitivity.