Scenario: A large villa with an annexed mother-in-law apartment. The owners of the property occupy the main house. My hosts rent the apartment, where I am currently staying with their dog. Each accommodation has its own entrance, and there are two separate gates on either side of the house. The owners knew I was coming. There were other sitters before. All good then? Not quite.
There is also a lovely grassy backyard. The backyard is shared, as there is no fence between the sections. The dog also uses the backyard for her needs. The owners are not fond of dogs and are, in general, not very friendly. Each time one of them appears in the backyard, the dog barks, so I leave my spot in the sun and bring her inside. This significantly limits my own and the dog’s ability to enjoy the outdoor space, which is frustrating. Note, the dog does not bark at other neighbors working in their gardens.
But there is more. The panoramic windows in the living room of the apartment face the backyard, while the bedroom window faces the path leading to my entrance gate. Imagine my surprise when I spotted the owner nonchalantly walking past my living room and bedroom windows to exit the property through my gate. Not only was it intrusive, but I also felt that my privacy was being violated and I was being watched.
While I have not yet discussed this directly with my hosts, I did mention the barking and my retreats indoors when the owners appear. To my surprise, my hosts do the same. With each passing day, I find myself becoming increasingly irritated by the situation. I also feel terribly sorry for the dog. Due to her reactivity, she is not being walked and is therefore extremely dependent on the backyard, not only for her needs but also for exercise. It really breaks my heart to have to limit her access to the outdoors.
Undisclosed owners (strangers) in the backyard disturbing my peace and peecking through my windows, incl the bedroom window, or popping unannounced in to check the water, must be in breach of the third-party policy? No?
p.s. just as I was about to post it, the owner came in through my gate with 4 people, and now they are all standing in front of my window talking
It’s a grey area as to whether it violates the no 3rd party rule but it sounds like this is a complex situation other sitters probably don’t want to be in the middle of. Certainly mention the property owners appear randomly outside the apartment window and the situation with having to remove the dog.
Was the set up disclosed in the listing or in the pre-confirmation chat? Did you see the owners actively looking in your windows? What is the comment about checking the water, didn’t see that mentioned.
From what you’ve written, this seems like an overreaction. The home itself is private and has a private entrance. The common spaces are just that - common.
The dynamic about the owners and the dog, meaning that you can’t effectively be outside with the dog due to reactivity, is something worth mentioning in the review. And if the HO did not mention that the yard is shared worth docking a star under “sit matches description”.
right, common places are common. I do not question that. My private gate is my private gate and there is no need for them to use my gate to enter/exit the property. Even less so as they need to walk by all my windows. They have their own gate.
The fact that the set up was not disclosed - that the yard is shared - is a big no. Not 3rd party breach (it is outdoors), but should be mentioned for future sitters. I’m sorry that this seemed like a nice sit and is actually quite uncomfortable
I still don’t understand - do they knock on your windows on their way past your space? That’s bizarre. Or was that checking the water.
If there is no fencing or separation or other delineation to keep them from using the gate by your accommodations, I don’t think it’s a breach, and they’re likely not actually checking up on you - it’s just a very big annoyance, and one that you were not adequately prepared for. Worth mentioning to the HO (in case they can ask the owners to modify behavior for the duration of your stay) and in the review.
I still think that the tension between the dog using the yard instead of being walked while reacting to the owners who don’t actually like dogs is the biggest issue.
The property sounds like a duplex or 2-unit apartment complex with common grounds. That’s a common housing configuration in the US. I have even seen large complexes with iron fencing between buildings with gates, a situation very equivalent to yours. The owners sound like busybody property managers, also not uncommon. Living in such an environ has unique annoyances, such as you describe, requiring different coping mechanisms. Most residents aren’t vacating in 10 days.
As the owners are unfriendly, reciprocate to dissuade interactions. No they can’t check the water or anything else in the unit you’re occupying. When you’re sunning and the dog starts barking, put in some ear plugs and continue sunning. No need for you to cater to the owner’s discomfort over the dog; it’s their problem, not yours. Let them leave the common area or live with their annoyance. Passive aggressive might have a bad rep but it has its uses.
Contact your THS host and ask them to request that these neighbours respect your privacy by not using “your” gate for the remainder of your stay, and instead use their own.
If there are known tensions with these neighbours regarding the dog using the shared/common areas—which are the only spaces where the dog can relieve herself and be exercised—this is essential information that should have been disclosed in the listing prior to confirming the sit.
As this important information was not disclosed prior to the start of the sit, you have the right to leave early if you prefer. However, you must give your hosts sufficient notice so they can return or arrange alternative pet care.
No, It is a large, upscale villa occupied by an elderly couple, with an attached one-bedroom mother-in-law apartment. Until recently, the owner’s mother actually lived there. After her passing, they began renting the unit out … currently to a THS member and my host. My host has lived here for quite some time now and as far as I know they have no plans to move out any time soon. It is I who will “move out” in 10 days. The sit ends in 10 days.
It is not that the owners are unfriendly. They are simply not very friendly. Different culture. And you´re right. I will not cater (too much) to the owner´s eventual discomfort. After all, it is him I partnered with but my host. It was all new to me and I wasn´t quite sure how to handle it. I felt as I was in the middle of something (owner vs my host), trying to cater to everyone.
I understood. My point is that your circumstances are nearly identical to what you would encounter sitting for a host living in an apartment or duplex. Apartment dwelling can feel tight and intrusive and require care in how you dress even within the apartment if there are no shades. But you are lucky. You only have 10 days. Most apartment dwellers would like to be in those shoes.
@august, housesit long enough and anyone will find quirky listings - sounds like you have one now.
Suggest separate any actions into a) impact your housesit experience, b) after housesit.
a) Presumably the tenant host and neighbour landlord have clear legal lease expectations in regards use of common spaces, access, privacy and any other concerns of yours. Ask host re topics mentioned in OP; clarify legal expectations; ask host to contact landlord to respect them (or simply ask landlord directly if host is slow). If issues persist, and you deem desirable, then we’d agree with @Silversitters that situation appears breach of THS Terms of Service so can give host notice.
b) Focus on any surprises that were significant to your experience. Include brief, polite, objective comments in review.
Nah, I will not take that step. I´ll stick it out. It is not “life and death” situation. However, I am becoming increasingly irritated and am unsure with whom I should address the issue, the owner or my host. I believe I am very flexible and can easily navigate or even accommodate various issues … but only when asked.
This should address with your THS host - because that is who your house sitting agreement is with , not a third party .
So the hosts know about this is what happens but deliberately chose not to disclose this before the sit started . So they put you in this situation knowing it would inevitably create friction - This is not fair on you or the dog .
The terms state
“Pet Parents You will:
5.2.5. notify a Sitter of any special requirements or behaviours relating to your pet(s) in your Home Listing and when you communicate with any Sitter and during the Handover ;”
Good hosts set sitters up for a successful sit by disclosing expectations , responsibilities and any quirks of the sit upfront . They should also tell you how to handle the situation for the sit to succeed .
If you address things directly with the neighbour and things don’t work out well you may create a problem for your host when they return , and they may end up reviewing you negatively.
@august Please state facts about the villa’s set-up in your review.
Wouldn’t you have wanted to know this before deciding whether to accept this sit? By stating a few facts about your lack of privacy around this villa, you’ll be doing a wonderful service for future sitters.
You say the owners are elderly and different culture. Possibly over protective of their property, nosy, lonely ? In scenarios like this where it was originally used for a member of the family the boundaries are different and they may have trouble adapting to that. They still see it as “theirs”.
Frustrating, irritating and annoying. You could start waving and chatting madly and see how that goes. Join in that conversation held right by the window
Yes, this is also how I see it. It is their home. I guess I should be glad they knock before coming in.
And yes to waving and chatting with them. I was contemplating that too before the first encounter. Then it felt a bit too late. Also, my host´s reaction, “they do it sometimes,” wasn´t very encouraging, so I distanced myself.
