I would just like some clarification on the third party policy if we are staying in the annex. We are on a sit until 18th, and staying in the annex which is adjoining the main house, but with shared garden. When we arrived the HOs said their son would be ‘popping in’ and that we won’t even notice him. He arrived on Wednesday. He said he will be here all the time now until his parents return. He has friends over and using the garden for BBQs and drinks. This means we can’t use the garden, and they are coming and going all the time.
Is this breaking the third party policy? We don’t want to leave, as we like the dog and also have nowhere to go. Any advice would be appreciated 
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Oh that’s not a good position to be in. Does the HO know that he isn’t just popping in but permanently there and having guests over? It would be good to know their position on it. If they don’t think it’s a problem & you’re happy to stay for the dog the only thing you can do is pre-warn future sitters of what could occur. If not I’d say it clearly breaches the rules & you’d be in your rights to report to THS & potentially terminate the sit.
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I haven’t messaged the HO yet, just waiting to hear what the Forum suggests. I’m worried she might say, “well, just leave then”. Either way, I will definitely put this in my review.
She might also be upset with him & know this isn’t right & put him straight. It might also make you feel better. Having said that she might also not see the problem - in which case your review will be important for future sitters.
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I am not sure if that would qualify or not as you are in a completely separate space and in that respect it would be similar to being in an apartment complex or such with shared outdoor space.
But, this is not the type of accommodation in which you are staying and you were not expecting to have anyone else on the property. I wouldn’t be happy with having someone else there making noise,etc…
Even if this would not be considered a breach of official terms and conditions, this was not what you agreed to, and when the parameters of a sit change in such a way that you would not have accepted in the first place , that is reasonable grounds to cancel a sit before it takes place or end it early.
Based on your comment that you are worried that she will simply suggest you leave, it sounds like leaving the sit isn’t really something you would consider anyway.
If you would really prefer he not be there, you can contact THS to get confirmation of whether this arrangement is a breach of the terms. If so, you have cover to ask that they do something about it.
If it isn’t considered a breach, you should bring it up anyway as they may not be aware he is staying there full-time and would tell him he can’t. Or if they think it isn’t a big deal, then it is up to you to decide if you want to stay or not–leaving is reasonable as you should not be expected to put up with his noise and activities when you were told he would not be there.
And if you do decide to stay for whatever reason, just own the choice and you’ll feel better about it.
In the event they don’t know he is staying there full-time now, and you choose not to bring it up, I don’t think it would be fair to mention it in the review as they may have rectified the issue by telling him he had to leave. So I think that regardless of what you plan to do or what THS says, you should bring it up and not assume they know what he is doing.
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You knew the garden was shared, so I can’t see how it is breaching any rules at all, and you’re in a separate annex, which I presume is self-contained, so that doesn’t breach the third party rule either.
You’ve obviously been chatting to him already, so why not ask him (or his parents if need be) to let you know when he has plans to have friends over, so you can go out for a while, and then you can both have your own space, and you can have it when he hasn’t got plans. That way, he’ll not be as spontaneous either 
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We once had to tell a HO that their son kept popping in, and she was mortified and put a stop to it immediately. I really hope it’s the same in your case, good luck with the next steps.
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We didn’t know we would have to share the garden, or any of the property. It was only mentioned upon arrival. Up until that point we were under the assumption that their main house would be empty of any family members, and that we would have sole use of the [beautiful and peaceful] garden. We have been given access to the main house to water plants, use dryer and games room. But now we feel awkward going in there, and don’t feel comfortable. So, if they are not breaking any third party policy, I guess we don’t have any right to question the situation.
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IMO this is disrespectful - if the son is home, why isn’t he taking care of the pets?
I see that this is somewhat grey, and it is a good idea to run it by member service, as it could be useful information anyway.
Personally I would see it as a breach of terms as the host should vacate the property for the enjoyment of the sitter. Because I have read about similar situations, I would avoid such sits - both in respect to hosts that don’t want to share their home and in respect to sits where other people «are popping in» etc.
Had it been my child I would say that he needed to take care of the pets to stay there and give the sitter free time or he would have to go to a friend or other. But I would have offered the sitter the option of my home, so..
Only you can know what options you have or want. I think this behavior is not right at all, and as the son is home it surely is not vacating the pets if you leave. The question is if you can/ want to leave or not.
EDIT: When I have seen other such sits the main home has been vacated. So understandable that one would assume that.
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Sorry I misunderstood, no that changes everything, if the space you are taking of includes entering the other side of the property to take care of plants etc, then I would have thought would breach the third party rule, you can’t be responsible for a space that someone else is living in, but to be fair, that’s a quick fix, the son just needs to do what you were doing, just make the owners aware of what now needs to happen.
Also, if their ad indicates the garden is yours, with no mention of sharing it, then that’s totally different too.
So you have every right to question the situation with them if you feel like that is what you want to do. For ourselves, we’ve had HO’s breach certain conditions on several occasions, but we didn’t mind in the slightest, because it didn’t affect our stay at all. Whereas yours IS affecting your stay, plus we’ve never arrived to then discover we’re sharing the garden… we’ve always been told in advance of things like that.
So you can either raise it with them, or contact the support team for help, or put up with it, and just reflect the full situation in your review of them, because it gets a very low accuracy of listing score, when the garden is not your own, which I would imagine played a huge role in your applying for this sit over others in the first place, also their hospitality score is affected because you can’t relax in the way you should be able to, and their communication score too, because they should have told you way in advance of these changes, so you could decide if you still wanted to go ahead or not. You should have been given a choice.
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If he and his friends have access to the main house, and so do you, who is going to get the blame if anything is damaged/goes missing/needs cleaning. If I was on this sit, then I would be advising the HO that I will not be entering the main house any longer.
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Agreed. I will let the parent know that any of the household jobs, ie: plant watering, garden watering, lawn mowing, and house security, should now be the responsibility of her son. We will just look after the dog, and be responsible for the annex where we are staying.
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Where does the dog stay -main house or annex ?
He’s in the annex with us. He’s got his bed and food here, he’s very happy 
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It definitely sounds like a breach of terms, but it also may be somewhat unintentional if the HO doesn’t know the son is behaving this way. I would have a conversation with the HO first as they may be eager and able to put a stop to it – and also, as it will impact their review, they will be blindsided if it isn’t mentioned beforehand.
Since it sounds like you’re not planning on leaving and are concerned about the HO taking it the wrong way, you can frame the message softly, maybe something like…
Hi - hope you’re enjoying your vacation! PET is doing well, and today we [fun report].
There is just one thing I wanted to confirm with you: There have been a few parties in the garden, and SON seems to be living in the house full-time now. Before, we had been under the impression he would only be dropping in here and there. We’re enjoying looking after PET and don’t want to stir up trouble, but we were hoping to get some clarity on what to expect around the house moving forward?
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Nah, wouldn’t work for us. We would contact owners, ready to leave.
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I would just let the ho know their son is at the main home full time rather than popping in off n on & bbqing with his guests in the garden area if thats fine with them …although it wasnt part of the agreemt
Im sure the h.o. would appreciate the truth of what is happening on site at the main home whilst they are away.
I remember 1 friend had parties at her auntys home while aunty was away on holiday…
1 party got out of hand & auntys home was mostly burnt down
she would have appreciated knowing parties were going on while she was away
She didnt imagine returning to a burnt home
Well this was a drastic experience, something which could have been avoided. Sadly it was 15 yrs before aunty & niece talked again.
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UPDATE
I left it for a couple of days as it was quiet. Then a few friends arrived again after 10pm and stayed the night. Generally quieter to be fair.
But we decided to contact the HO and ask if they were aware of this happening. We wanted them to know that we were uncomfortable with random people in their house, and that we would not be responsible if there was any damage etc.
The HO was also under the impression that he would only be ‘popping in’. They spoke to him and since then there hasn’t been any more visitors.
I feel we handled it diplomatically, letting them know our feelings without it getting awkward between us.
The sit has finished now and we were thanked for everything.
Thanks to everyone who responded on here, we did take on board some of your tips and suggestions, and it worked out well in the end. 
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Whether it officially violates the third party rule or not you agreed to the sit under false pretences. The listing offered use of a private garden, and instead you’re not only sharing the garden but a relative of the host is aware of your comings and goings which is not something you signed up for.
It’s completely inappropriate and not in the spirit of a mutual exchange.
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