Poor communication

I have agreed to a sit over Christmas. The owner has not answered any of my message requests since he secured the sit. What would you all do, in this situation?

As the days click by, I’m beginning to get concerned at his lack of response.

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If you have their phone number, you can try calling them.

Welcome @Dunne if they haven’t responded within 72 hours of your messages ask member services to contact them

Support @trustedhousesitters.com

You may want to read a similar thread where a fellow sitter is having a similar problem and the advice that has been given .

@Dunne That is really frustrating!

Just curious if the following happened immediately before or after accepting/confirming the Sit?

Did you exchange email addresses with the Owner?

Did you exchange phone numbers with the Owner?

Did you connect on WhatsApp with the Owner?

Do you have their physical address so that you can arrange travel?

Unfortunately, all of this is on YOU, the Sitter! None of this information will be provided to you unless the Owner provides it, which typically does not happen unless I ask.

Did you have a video chat with the Owner before accepting the Sit?

What country does the Owner live in ?

What country do you live in?

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Thanks so much for all this info/suggestions. I’m new at this and appreciate it!

I don’t think it is totally on the sitter to get this information. I’ve had some sits where I’ve had to ask multiple times to even get the address. Sure the sitter should ask, but the HO does have a responsibility to provide contact info. I typically provide my email address and phone number (as a sitter) and ask for their info as soon as the sit is confirmed. Typically, HOs respond with their info, but not always.

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I strongly believe that THS should provide this information when Sits are finalized. We belong to Home Exchange also, and that is how it works on Home Exchange. As soon as an exchange is “finalized,” both parties are able to view the other’s information: Address, email address, phone number.

This information is all in one place so that everyone knows where to find it.

I am trying to help other Sitters out there, to TELL THEM that THEY need to ASK FOR this information once a Sit is confirmed, so that they are not left in the lurch. Sure, the Owners have responsibility too, but too often I see the Sitters are the ones who suffer due to lack of communication.

@Dunne should read this too.

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I completely agree that THS should provide that info once the sit is confirmed. It really shouldn’t be the case that we have to send multiple messages trying to get contact info. But, you’re right, currently that’s how it works.


Email addresses and phone numbers I think should be mandatory upon acceptance by both sides. Then all communications can be made much easier than going through the site where messages seem to be so often missed or unattended to. Email and phone contact gives you a DIRECT line of communication between both parties. But that’s all the personal information that should be shared until closer to sit time when everyone is pretty much guaranteed it is all going to work out.

Too many cancellations lately from both sides, from what I read in the forum lately, which could make HO’s uncomfortable sharing any further really personal security information.

@ziggy @Dunne I agree with email addresses and phone numbers.

Additionally, I think the physical address of the Sit (the Owner’s address) should also be provided. The Sitter needs to arrange travel. This should be provided immediately.

If the Owner was dishonest about their location in their listing, this would be a good time for the Sitter to know the true location!

Personally I’d contact support and ask them if they can get in touch with him on your behalf, and if no luck, I’d cancel it, and find somewhere else. I wouldn’t put my life on hold for anyone else, it’s CHRISTMAS!

But for the future, make sure you get a mobile contact and full address as soon as possible each and every time.

@PVGemini I think giving out the physical address at the very beginning is an “iffy” one. I think give out the street name INITIALLY so as the sitter can look up transport etc but I know from past experiences that a HO would be reluctant to pass out such information on a first conversation. As future conversations ensue, as they normally would, each party then feels more comfortable giving out nearly anything! I just accepted a sit for Christmas and after an HOUR on the phone chatting, we really felt extremely comfortable, and secure, with each other so all information, including address, were exchanged.

I’ve said it before but I believe with reading how many cancellations there seem to be lately, I personally would be reluctant to give out my exact address before feeling completely confident about it all. Of course cancellations do happen for good reasons - but a lot aren’t.

@HappyDeb just want to make sure that you know that a Sitter cannot cancel a Sit. They have to ask the Owner to cancel the Sit. And if the Owner is not communicating at all…


I guess the Sitter can ask THS to internally cancel the Sit. Lots of hoops to jump through…

I’ve had a few HOs send the welcome guide and access info to enter the house on the day of the sit. They probably don’t want to send personal security info due to cancellations but I will say that it’s very stressful as a sitter sitting in front of the house reading through the welcome guide and reading pages and pages worth of info due to the HOs not trusting enough to send it ahead of time. This is TrustedHouseSitters not SuspiciousHouseSitters

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Some people just aren’t that great at responding or follow through. I did a sit this year for a lovely couple but getting the info I needed was like pulling teeth. I think I asked for their contact info 3 or 4 times. But yes, like others have said, if at all possible get their contact info ASAP so that you have multiple methods of getting hold of them

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@IHeartAnimals I mean just not providing sensitive information on INITIAL acceptance. Send the WG but I don’t believe this guide needs to include everything as in street numbers and security information. That kind of information can be provided upon arrival (not address details of course) on a separate note, handwritten, or whatever, or included in a welcome folder, which I personally find I get on EVERY sit. Naturally and of course you wouldn’t want to be reading through a guide at their front door.

@ziggy yes that would be a win win. Leave security info out until closer to the sit but send the welcome guide so that sitters have time to ask questions or clarification about the pets

@IHeartAnimals 100% agree🥂

It’d be easier if this info were required, but any sitter should ask for it since it’s not. Even if the HO doesn’t want to share a street address early, there’s no reason they couldn’t give say the address of a nearby business or such.

And devil’s advocate, so what if you gave your address and someone canceled, worst case? What exactly would they do with the address that would likely be nefarious? There are many easier ways to get addresses if you were up to no good. And many of these sit addresses aren’t even local to the applicants.

Of course one gives the full address! For almost everybody, that is public information (unless one is 007, or in a witness protection scheme etc, and such people should not be on THS).

Even if there are privacy concerns for some very upscale secluded properties (like Mar-a-Lago or similar), the sitter needs the address, but not necessarily the full legal name the celebrity owner. (I have been surprised by some addresses in the mail.)