Hello All,
Just maybe need to vent here, started a three week cat sit a week ago. Small apartment building , tight quarters .
There is a woman in the apartment below me that is obviously having mental challenges, basically screaming bloody murder for the past five days and nights at random times. I went to throw the trash and she threatened to toss a bottle of what looked like urine at me. Screaming at me to " Stop ! "
Actually feel like I’m getting PTSD from the chaos. I’m 70, a bit past my party days for this type of action.
And I was warned that there might be a little " noise " from her. But nothing like this . I’m wondering how to deal with this with the HO. She’s out of town and I’m really struggling with this situation.
Don’t want to leave a bad review, the cat has been a sweet companion. But this is like living above a madhouse.
Anyway…could use some advice or words of encouragement.
Thanks
I’m sorry to read this, how frightening for you. While I have empathy for your neighbour, you have to look after yourself. You didn’t mention wanting to cut the sit short, which I believe is your only option and something worth considering. It might be worth contacting THS to inform them of the situation, but I’m not sure what they will be able to do other than terminate the sit or check in with you periodically to see how it is going.
Also, while I appreciate you want to leave a good review, overall this is not a good house sit, no matter how lovely the cat may be. This is something that is necessary to mention for the safety of other sitters. If a sitter read a glowing review that didn’t explicitly state the issues you’ve encountered, they’d be more likely to take the sit and find themselves too in a frightening (if not dangerous) situation. This might be commonplace to the home owner who is obviously more used to it, but as you know, coming into an situation like this can be terrifying. I’m not sure this particular home owner should be on the platform while she is living in an environment that could be deemed unsafe for sitters.
Hello there and I’m so sorry to hear the situation you’ve found yourself in.
You most certainly do need to reference this in your review, I’d put something like “future sitters need to be aware that a tenant within the complex appears to be struggling with their mental well-being and impacted my sit numerous times as their behaviour was unpredictable and upsetting” - Then continue to mention the positives.
Also continue to try and contact the owner and if you feel you can’t stay, contact the emergency contact in the welcome guide and let THS know.
- I’d call the police and/or social welfare agencies, regardless of sitting. That’s because this person has threatened you and is a public menace. They could end up hurting other people as well. If police or social services are called, they’d presumably contact the individual’s support network and maybe get them longer-term care and/or (back) on medication. And in various jurisdictions, they’ll put people into emergency psychological hold if they’re deemed a threat to themselves or others. Note: Tossing urine on someone would be considered an assault in various jurisdictions. If they actually carried it out, they would be jailed and you could press charges.
- I’d report the host to THS, because this doesn’t sound like a reasonable THS sit at all.
- If you want to leave, let the host and THS know in writing and give them 24 hours notice, so they can figure out alternative care. If you call the police and/or social services, include reference to the case number and documentation.
- Review factually to warn off other sitters.
Great advice from others. I would just add that taking contact with police/ social services etc also can be a help to her as it is obvious that she is not well.
It must be very scary and stressing for you. I do think you should consider giving 24 hour notice and leaving if you are able to. It is important to not cancel the sit but shorten the days so that you are able to leave a review. I can imagine you wouldn’t been in this situation if a previous sitter had left an honest and factual review. When the sit-dates are ended you will be able to apply for other sits.
I feel for you. I live in a multifamily building with a “character”, but there is nothing like this.
I would absolutely contact the HO about this - it’s entirely possible this is new behavior from the unstable neighbor but there might also be an established path of dealing with this woman. Were you left any way to contact building management? Is there any signage up in common areas like the entrance with contact information? I guarantee this will not be the first time they’ve heard it about her.
Great advice from @Daisy999 about how to review.
Hi @RCasa
Sorry you have had to deal with such a troubling situation. Not sure where in the world you are sitting? Having dealt with an unstable neighbour in my small apartment block in London UK, it takes a long time to resolve things here.
For your situation I’d contact THS support and the HO to advise them of the troubling situation. I think you need the HO to make other sitting arrangements and tell them you need to leave asap. Good luck.
In your shoes, I would ask the homeowner a leading question to find out if she was previously aware of the extent of the neighbour’s behaviour or if it is genuinely a massive and recent escalation on the neighbour’s part.
It’s very possible that if the neighbor has been struggling with mental health issues, she may be escalating at this point, and the homeowners might have been honest with you in terms of what to expect, but the situation has gotten worse. So the first thing I would do is contact them and let them know what you are seeing, hearing, and experiencing. Ask them what they would do in this situation?
If you don’t feel safe, you need to let them know that because they and you might need to make another plan such as cancelling the sit and getting someone else in, having a friend pick-up and take the cats, etc.
Depending where you are there might be different numbers or agencies you can call. In the US in most places, the police can do a welfare check if there are concerns. In some places they might come out with a mental health professional. Or they might transport someone to a hospital to be evaluated by a mental health professional. Depending on the location, the local police and/or mental health agencies may be aware of who the person is and their history.
At this point, this is about an immediate crisis and safety. It’s not about who is going to leave whom a bad review.
Agree with this. It would also be an idea to ask what safeguarding measures are in place for the neighbour, whether she has someone caring for or checking in on her, to be able to form a clearer understanding of her circumstances, and for your own safety.
By alerting the HO to the fact this is an issue, she may be able to assist in some way, and you’ll be in a better position to determine whether to continue the sit. Communication is key.
But you should mention this problem, to spare other sitters the aggravation…
Had this HO previous reviews? Were there in hindsigt any vague hint of this problem?
Were there previous sitters that had not written a review? (Those you can only see in the app, not in the web interface.)
Hi @RCasa, what a terrible situation. We would be so upset to find ourselves in such a situation. Can you survive another 2 weeks of that? Has the matter escalated since you started a week ago? Is it possible that you are (inadvertently) aggravating the women below you by walking loudly, or jumping, or is your TV too loud? Not blaming you, just wondering if it could be a blow up of an unstable person and new circumstances…
What is the home owner’s plan B? Can you get on board with that? Or can you move out and take the cat with you into emergency accommodation?
Good luck, sending you hugs and good thoughts.
Why? This seems unfair to future housesitters. Lots threads on reviews in Forum. Best practice seems to be honest and specific.
Re disturbance, as first step then encourage speak with THS team. As appropriate, escalate to police. Please take care of yourself and ensure safety. This is neither your property nor a job. Housesitting should not involve personal danger.
Thank you everyone for your words of support. I’m going to contact the HO and see if we can shorten the sit . I talked to another neighbor and they tell me that the troubled person has been contacted my mental health authorities and the police several times and refuses to take her medication. This just might be an escalation because she doesn’t recognize me and it’s threatening to her or…who knows , it’s not easy to diagnose these things. Above my pay grade ! I’ll post a follow-up as things develop . Thank you again
No Tv here, and I’m very considerate about being a very quiet upstairs neighbor. It seems she’s a person who’s going through a crisis I guess. Unfortunate circumstances. Talked to the HO, looks like we are making progress on a resolution.
Hi @RCasa
So sorry to hear about this - I’m glad that you’ve been able to talk to the HO. Have you managed to agree on a plan with them for what happens now?
I am in your age range and have sympathy for you. At this age we don’t need that drama. Do what you feel comfortable doing. No one else is there to judge how serious this is or not so no one has the right to advise you to stay or go. We all experience these things differently. This person may be all talk and no action or she may be capable of getting physically violent. No one knows and not taking meds when having a serious mental condition makes her unpredictable.
She was working on a solution with TH yesterday. I can’t apply for any sit while I’m under this sit due to the website lock out . I offered to stay in the same area for a bit so that I could do daily visits to look after her cat while she found an alternative. As it stands today, It looks like I’m finding a hotel asap.
Hi Jenny,
Waiting to hear back from the HO, she was contacting TH to allow me to apply for other sits in the area , I offered to look in on her cat if I’m close by. Haven’t heard back yet.
@RCasa If you take a screenshot of communication with the HO, showing that she has acknowledged your intention to leave, then send it to MS via live chat and ask them to end the sit so you can apply for alternatives.