First sit: Emotional attached!

I just completed my first sit which I loved, but I found the day of leaving so so sad. I really miss the cat and I’ve been so sad and missing him since I left. He was really affectionate and we spent so much time together. I’m sad because I’m worried that maybe this isn’t for me if I can’t get a grip on my emotions!

Has anyone else experienced this? Does it get easier the more you do?

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Hi @woowoo and a warm welcome to the Community Forum :wave:t2::slightly_smiling_face:

Every time we are emotional when we have to say goodbye but yes it will get easier for you. I completely understand how hard it is after having built up an amazing bond with an animal and then having to say goodbye. Try to focus on the amazing times you had with them and then focus that emotion on to your next sit. Remember you are certainly not alone with these feelings.

For reference as a member you can also add your TrustedHousesitters profile on to your Forum profile by following the attached link, should you wish. This will then enable others to offer you helpful advice and feedback.

If you are unsure how to do this, or if you have any questions at all, do not hesitate to ask, we are all more than happy to help. :blush:

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I remember my first sitting 13 years ago. When we said goodbye to the 2 dogs I burst into tears, which is not like me at all.
I had been walking round with a letter of resignation for a few months waiting for the right time. When I arrived home, I signed it and handed it into my employers the next day.
We have since carried out over 120 sittings, each one is emotional when we leave. Some of them are repeat sittings so even more emotional.
I can honestly say that our lives have been transformed for the better and we are just so happy that we have been able to provide love and companionship to these pets while we have been with them.
It is for you, definitely!!

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I really understand this feeling.

I remember my first ever sit a few years ago was with the sweetest Havenese dog and I absolutely adored her.

I became her total belly rub slave and I loved every minute of my time spent with her.

I was so choked up to leave her that the tears was stinging at the back of my eyes as I was trying to hold it together when leaving her. Leaving the animals can definitely be one of the hardest parts of a sit so you’re definitely not alone in feeling like this.

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We found out last night that one of our favourite cats has been in a road accident and died - we’re broken :sob:

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Oh @Colin … I am so very sorry to hear about this. It’s the same feeling of loss, as if you owned the cat, so I can understand how very, very sad you must be feeling. My thoughts are with you both and, of course, the pet parents, who must be devastated. :cry:

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Welcome @woowoo. Getting attached to pets you are sitting for is part and parcel of being a great sitter. You never forget about the pets you’ve sat for, just look forward to the next pet sit.

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Oh @Colin that’s terrible. My thoughts to you both.
I guess this is the unfortunate side of being an invested sitter.

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Oh @Colin that is such terribly sad news and I know just how you are feeling. In a matter of 3 weeks from mid Dec last year, I learnt of 4 of “my” pets dying with one I was to be returning to look after in February, along with their dog. I was just heartbroken thinking of what beautiful cats and dogs they were and how much they would be missed by their loving families. I’m just pleased they all allowed me to be a part of their lives.

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So sorry to hear this, absolutely heart breaking :cry:

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@Colin I am so sorry to hear this and am thinking of you and Karyo, (big hugs to you both), and of course the pet parents. Absolutely heartbreaking :broken_heart::sob:

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@Colin I am so sorry, this is heartbreaking for you and the pet parents.

When we share in the lives of pets in the intimate way that we do as sitters they become “ours” as Therese says, the sense of loss can be the same as if they were our very own family members and because of that we have a special empathy and connection with the pet parents who often go through their grief alone.

My thoughts are with you all at this very sad time. :cry:

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HI @woowoo your feelings are absolutely normal and the way many of us feel, I cannot tell you how many tears I have shed, @Itchyfeet explains it so well and I’m sure speaks for many of us …

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I think the hardest times for me are when it seems that the animals get more attention or care with me vs the real owner. I look in their eyes and wonder who they would choose!
I’ve learned from this and tend to choose homes where the animals are well loved- though this can mean they are spoiled rotten too!
I think the best you can do is keep sitting and think of the love you can gift to these pets and how you can pay it forward !

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I’m so sorry @Colin and completely understand. One of my favourite dogs became suddenly ill and had to be put to sleep not long after Christmas. The kids and I were all devastated. Some weeks later google photos provided me with a montage of photos of her and broke me again.

We have since returned to care for the owners other dog and cat, and will do so again later in the year. Huge lump in throat seeing the other dog go running after a dog on the beach who looked like her. Both pets are still adjusting to no longer having their older, wiser sibling around. Even the very independent cat has become more affectionate.

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You’re the kind of sitter the owners dream of having! You’re giving their pets real love, not just food and scooping. Please keep going, we want more like you!

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@woowoo ,

I can relate. You develop a quite bond with pets and my wife cried after our first sit. It’s gotten easier for her the more we have done it.

@Colin I feel your pain. I was looking at info on our past sits and saw that only one of the 2 dogs was now listed. I was surprised at how hard it hit me. One of the wonderful things about our experiences with THS is the friendships developed with the people and we reached out to them to offer our condolences.

Dan and Nan

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thank you all so much for your messages, I’ve applied for a few more sits on the back of your kind words!

I hope I will learn resilience through this, and also like you have all mentioned, it’s a sign of a deep connection and bond which is what any pet parent would want from a sit!

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We had heartbreaking news last night too. One of our favourite dogs died yesterday, peacefully at home. We are very fortunate that we visited the pet parent’s who are now our life long friends not that long ago, so we got to spend lots of time with him but the loss is so painful. :sob::broken_heart:

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Really sorry to hear that Sam :broken_heart:

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