I have had a 3 week sit scheduled for more than a month. A couple weeks ago (about two weeks of having this sit booked) the owner asked if she left a few days later if it would mess up my schedule. I told her yes it would because I am a remote worker and planned it so I had back-to-back sits so I have somewhere to work from each workday. She said “ok I’m glad I asked” and I then confirm the original date and she confirmed. Now, less than a week from the sit she is wanting to leave on the later date. She said I could stay at her house with her the few days that would overlap. I am not at all comfortable with this but don’t really know how to tell her that without making things very awkward. Am I being unreasonable to not want to share the space with the homeowner? How do I proceed from here? If I tell her I don’t want to do that, the sit will be awkward, but I really don’t want to share the space with another person especially if I am trying to work. I really don’t want to have to rent somewhere for those days because I am trying to save my money. What would you all do?
Such a classic example!
A one night overlap is pretty normal, but more than that must be agreed BEFORE the Sit is confirmed.
Owners really need to think things through better BEFORE confirming a Sitter. Important details should be in the listing so that Sitters who apply are aware of the situation to which they are agreeing.
So what are your choices at this point:
- Suck it up and do it.
- Cancel.
- Tell her that she cannot be there, and if she cannot make other arrangements, then you need to cancel.
- Make other arrangements for yourself during the period of time that she will be home.
Just a warning: If you choose option 1, be aware that you are under no obligation to carry out any chores for her while she is there.
@AshleyShore the agreed T&Cs of a sit are that homeowner vacates the home for the entire stay.
“5.2.13. ensure your home is vacated for a Sitter throughout the duration of the Sit , and that no third parties will interfere with the Sitter’s enjoyment of your property;”
Are you a Premium member ?
Asking because if so this could be considered a cancelled sit and covered by the sit guarantee that premium members get with their membership.( covering some of the cost of alternative accommodation- you pay upfront and are repaid 2-7 months later ) so potentially this could be used to cover alternative accommodation up to the point that the homeowner actually departs - you would need to get member services to confirm that this is covered.
Cancelled by homeowner because they are not going away when they said they would . Cancelled by owner because they have only now revealed information that wasn’t disclosed previously and as such because of a third party being present it’s against T&Cs.
If you contact member services they can remind the homeowner of the code of conduct that they agree to vacate the home during the stay . They can’t force the homeowner to leave their home. Best way to Contact member services quickly is to do a live chat and ask to speak to a human.
If you want the sit cancelled and are not covered by the sit guarantee you could look for an alternative sit to cover those dates . If you decide on this make sure that member services cancel the dates on your dashboard so that you can start applying for an alternative sit .
If you decide just to put up with it you might want to also think about the possibility that this homeowner (having not been upfront and honest with you about their departure date )is just as likely to return early and you face another overlap living with them at the end of your stay.
I really think there is no problem, HO could have change of schedule, and they are always very nice to be with. A real problem is when they cancel you, and you are left without a place to stay.
@sylviec but it’s against the THS agreement - whilst some sitters may be happy with the arrangement , many will not for a variety of valid reasons and they shouldn’t be pressured to do something that they are not comfortable with.
The THS T&Cs state that Pet Parents must
5.2.13. ensure your home is vacated for a Sitter throughout the duration of the Sit , and that no third parties will interfere with the Sitter’s enjoyment of your property;
It’s your call @AshleyShore - you suck it up, you cancel, you call it again and hope they back down, you suggest they stay somewhere else and you’ll come later or request that they pay/contribute if you stay elsewhere. They’re all options. None ideal as the HO has changed the plan (& TBH sounds as if they were going to do that all along). For us we’d say thanks but no thanks and please cancel the sit and hope that called their bluff to rethink. You can also ask member support for intervention as it breaks Ts & Cs to have a third party in the house during a sit. If you do both stay then pet & home responsibilities are entirely theirs not yours. Hope it works out 
At the very least, the Owner should immediately change the dates of the ACTUAL SIT so that your calendar opens up. Then you can apply for other Sits, given the new rule which forbids overlaps.
You might be able to find something for a few nights nearby, to fill the gap that has now been created.
I seem to be in the minority but this wouldn’t be a big deal for me. Sure, I’d feel a bit awkward about sharing the space with the HO for a few days but I would suck it up for the sake of a few days in a three week sit. Obviously, HOs should ensure that the dates they post are firm but things happen. I’m sure if, for example, your onward travel was disrupted (car broke down, plane/train cancelled etc.), you’d hope that the HO would have a bit of flexibility in allowing you to stay on for a few days.
So I just messaged the HO and am waiting for a reply. Please let me know what you all think about my reply to her:
I really want to be accommodating as possible but I’m not really comfortable with that and it is against Trusted House Sitters terms and conditions (5.2.13). I really wish you would have been honest with me about the situation when we talked about the dates two weeks ago when there was enough time to change plans. I really want to sit for your pets so hopefully you do decide to drive as originally planned but if you do plan to fly and won’t be leaving until the 19th please cancel the sit and post it again for the actual dates you’re looking for a sitter.
Bravo 
@AshleyShore - a fair, measured and firm message that looks after you first and foremost. Well done 
When we first started sitting, we originally thought the idea of arriving the day before an HO left really wasn’t for us, but a few months later we did it, and it was great. It was weirdly like staying with friends, so we wouldn’t have a problem now staying for a few days, but that hasn’t arisen as yet.
We actually made it our mission/goal to ‘get over ourselves’ and to do one deliberately to take away the awkwardness in our own minds. As a self-growth thing, liberating thing. Maybe you could try viewing it differently.
If they still want you, they will realize they have to find a hotel or other accommodations for those three nights.
This is a good response. I like that you kept your boundaries and made it their choice to cancel and relist correct dates. If you had the premium membership this would allow you to claim the insurance but at the very least it shows THS that the owner is the cause of the problem rather than you or it being a mutual decision.
I would only consider a few days overlap if I knew the person from sitting before any even then it would not be ideal and i may find a co-working space to use.
I do hope you manage to find another sit if they do cancel.
@AshleyShore great reply to homeowner , measured but firm in your expectations.
Please report back on the result . All the very best .
It can be perfectly fine if one can go touristing during the day, while the owners still take care of the dog etc. But it is not nice when one is told so late (deliberately it seems).
However, it is difficult/impossible when one needs to get some work done. Especially when it is remote work that needs guaranteed confidentiality.
This is a mutual exchange how would the homeowner feel if the sitter said I’ve had a change of schedule so I’ll be arriving a week later than we agreed or staying a week longer than we agreed?
Exactly this.
If owners want this level of flexibility then a paid professional service is what they need. Someone local who can start 3 days later (and probably still charge for the 3 days).
Similarly if sitters want to be able to alter dates then what they are looing for is airbnb or hotels dot com.
I take my planned dates for sits very seriously as I know the disruption it can cause to alter them and would hope owners do the same.
Also no-one books travel at Christmas last minute so they have definitely known for a while what their plans were.
Well that’s a ridiculous thing to say as @AshleyShore has said she works from home & obviously needs her space. Plus as @Silversitters has pointed out it’s against THS Ts & Cs & is not what was confirmed
There’s a difference between one night & several days though, especially if you have to work
UPDATE:
Owner decided to drive like originally planned! Yay! BUT she won’t be leaving until the day after the sit was supposed to start. So, we will share the house for one evening/morning. I felt like this was a decent compromise especially since she said she would now be taking both dogs with her, and I will only have 3 cats to watch now. I really apricate everyone’s input, it really put my mind at ease that I was not being unreasonable. Thanks all!!!