Y’all so I did a sit which I thought went great. I absolutely went out of my way for this owner. I was actually shocked they reached out because at first they rejected my application due to me not being the right “fit” and finding someone else. Which I understood not going to get them all. Then out of nowhere they reach out give me a 1 day notice if I was available. I literally changed my whole schedule for this family. I found it odd after the owner reached out to me on the app she stopped communicating with me completely. Her daughter sorta became the middleman which also really made me feel some type of way! She did leave her “email” which I thought was odd when she clearly has a phone. Nevertheless I still went above and beyond. They changed the date on me and came home early I still was understanding. The day they said they would come back home they couldn’t tell me exactly the time they would be there. So I just had to sit and wait as if my time isn’t important as well. The moment you change my schedule I have to move a lot of things around it’s very clear on my profile I travel with my child. So that infuriated me but I bite my tongue and still CLEANED THEIR POOL. There was a storm and I really wanted them to come back to a clean home inside and out. Got so many praises on the care of the animal and how the house was upon arrival by the husband & daughter but he’s not the one who booked me so I knew the review wasn’t going to come from him.
I try not to take things personally but that really bummed me out! You would think some type of respect would be given. Just a tiny bit! Not even a message from her saying thank you, NOTHING. I feel used!
Has anything like this happened to a sitter before? Where you have gone above and beyond for an owner and really believed you would receive a good review just for them to ghost you? How did you get over it?
Hi @Victory and how very sad for you. However, I think you can learn from this experience. Personally I wouldn’t have accepted the sit at such short notice if I’d earlier been told I wasn’t a “good fit” and would definitely have felt used. Hopefully if you’ve already given feedback for the HO you mentioned how you went out of your way and that husband & daughter were really happy with you. If you haven’t then do write that. Perhaps a gentle hint to the owner to leave you a review saying how important they are to you. Good luck!
Oh, in answer to your question, I’ve been lucky enough to have received reviews for every sit I’ve done so far, a couple of owners I’ve had to chase though but got there in the end!
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Hi Victory
Sorry you had such a bad experience. The main piece of advice I would offer is one shift in your thinking that may make you feel better. You noted the HO contacted you on very short notice and you rearranged your whole schedule for them. You didn’t have to accept the sit, you chose to.
This is not to lay blame with you and say you deserved the bad experience. But the circumstances around accepting the sit are what probably lies at the root of your frustration–you went out of your way to help someone and they didn’t seem to appreciate it.
If a HO told me they didn’t think I was a good fit and then reached out to me to do a sit, I would say ‘no.’ Not because of a bruised ego, but because it is important to me that HO’s who choose my husband and I do so with confidence. I am all about having this process be as smooth and ‘aligned’ as possible. I wouldn’t feel comfortable sitting for someone who wasn’t fully comfortable with us.
I think this experience has lots of good lessons for you. Perhaps you did a lot of things in the house that really weren’t necessary and you might decide not to put that burden on yourself the next time. In retrospect you may have sensed a ‘red flag’ but you ignored it. So moving forward, you will not apply or accept sits where something feels ‘off.’ The experience of the HO not giving a return time may be a good lesson for future sits. If you know when applying for a sit that you usually need to leave by a certain time, you can let them know. Often times, HO’s are fine with–and may even prefer–the sitter leaves before they get back.
There can be a learning curve to this all.
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@Victory I can feel your frustration. Give it a little more time, and please prompt them for their review. People get busy or forget, so a text reminder would be fine. You can even tell them how to leave a review if it’s their first time. And explain to them that a review is very important to you to gain future sits. Also send a system reminder after 5 days if you still haven’t heard from them. Keep in mind, for some people it’s just not important.
Also, you need to stand up for yourself. Set boundaries. Teach other people how to treat you. This is a learning experience. It is not okay to sit and wait until they return. Next time, if they don’t respond, tell them you will be leaving at e.g. 2pm and will leave the key at xyz.
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@Victory I am so sorry that you have had this experience. You never know exactly what the Owners are thinking or expecting. Try not to lose any sleep over it. Don’t take it personally. Perhaps the wife/mother is having a mental health crisis? Who knows? As members of both Trusted Housesitters and HomeExchange, we have met people of all types. It is frustrating to bend over backwards and still not satisfy. Ugh. Over time, your experience will help you to avoid these situations. You have acted with grace. Kudos to you!! Move on. The world awaits your beautiful contribution.
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You are right a learning experience indeed! Definitely error on my part right there accepting it. Also with being new on the site I was also thinking about just building up trust within the community. So accepting seemed like the right choice at the time! I also truly don’t want anyone to miss their trip. I try to put out in the world what I want returned to me.
I didn’t leave a feedback yet! I will once I’ve processed it but as of right now it still rubs me the wrong way. I rather handle the situation when I’m level headed and not emotional.
I’m not even upset about the no reviews which would’ve been nice. I know reviews aren’t required but kindness is. Just how I was made to feel after saying yes really hurt my feelings!
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You’re right it was my choice and I made a poor one. I learned many lessons on this sit! I definitely didn’t speak up because I really was trying not to blow it for myself! I worked in customer service so it’s just in me to aim for customer satisfaction. Nevertheless, it was my choice and I should’ve choice better.
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Will do next time! I guess being new my concern is just trying to do everything to keep the owner happy so I don’t get a less than perfect review.
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You’re absolutely right! Mutual respect is just so important to me but I shouldn’t let it eat me up! Thank you all! I just need to shake it off and not take it so to heart!
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@Victory I don’t think you made a poor choice. You’re new to the platform and enthusiastically wanted to get started housesitting, a HO said yes, and you wanted to do a good job and went out of your way. Some sitters start with good ones and then later get a bad one. Maybe this one is making you feel used but future ones will be great. And trust me, there are great, gracious, kind HO’s you’ll meet on this platform.
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You’re clearly a very kind, thoughtful person and that will go down well with and be recognised by most home owners. I can understand you wanted to start off well and you’re to be applauded for that. Try to put this, unusual incident, down to experience because, believe me, you’ll have some fabulous experiences with your daughter and meet some wonderful owners and their pets 
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It sounds like them not leaving a review is the real thing that is on your mind. Is there a chance they may just not be tech people??? Don’t like using the phone, email, websites etc? Personally, if you think they thought you were good and just simply forgot and didn’t realise that a review would be great for you, ad if you enjoyed being there, then you already know their address, why not try the old-school approach, pop them a thank you card in the post, thanking them for letting you stay and how you enjoyed the time you spent with the pet/s, and ask them if they will leave you a review. You’ve lost nothing by doing so. They’ll probably just think it was extra nice of you to post them a thank you card. It could simply be that they just don’t realise how important a review is to a sitter.
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@Victory Don’t beat yourself up about it. It just always feels better to realize we in fact made a choice and take ownership of it–makes us feel less of a victim if the choice doesn’t go well! Being new to sitting, I’m sure you were eager to get some reviews under your belt and I get why you decided to do it. Lots of stuff here to reflect on and it will serve you well in the future. You will find yourself getting a better sense of the right opportunities and will become more confident as time goes on in passing on the ones that you know aren’t the right fit for you.
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I did reach out the next day after my sit was done and no response. I’ve moved on from it now! Thank you guys for just allowing me to vent and get it out. Just a learning curve. Im currently on a sit of my dream. I should focus on the present and not get so hung up on the past.
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You sound just like my mom always tries to make me see what I could’ve done better. Lol love it and hate it! The way you broke it down definitely feel less emotional about it today.
The owners might have been very busy the day after they returned, and have forgotten to leave a review. I usually wait a few days after a sit ends before requesting a review.
I would send another mild reminder, explaining how important reviews are to a new sitter, and including the exact link to make it easier for them. That’s the last reminder I would send.
Have you left a review for them?
By the way, I see that your profile says you are travelling “single”. There are lots of photos of your adorable daughter, but not much mention of her in the text either. I would put information about her much earlier, in the 'About" section, explaining how she is good with animals. Homeowner will want to know how a very young child will cope with their pets.
Have they left a review for previous sitters?
I will no longer accept sits from people who declined before, unless it was for a good reason and they explained it to me.
One time I accepted such a sit (they declined without a word first, then a few weeks later got in touch and invited me) and it has been my worst experience on THS.
You do learn lessons when things go wrong!
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Same thing happened to me on 2nd sit for same HO. Not only came from out of state but worked my life around theirs and cleaned the house, the pets, etc and had fun adventures with the puppy. Scrubbed a house the left a disaster for me to deal with. She rearranged the schedule multiple times without notice right before and then during sits. Last departure I put my foot down because I had to go to another sit 6 hours away.
money out of my pocket even. I was praised but them and others in the area but crickets. I even tried to ask this site for help and was denied… It happens, not likely the last time, but would be nice to show the “resume” and how we go above and beyond. I keep getting requests without soliciting so, this makes me feel better but think there needs to be at least a checklist to close a sit.
Edited to meet posting guidelines
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