I have my fourth sit arranged. It starts tomorrow. My previous sitters have all had their own cars. My scheduled sitter (who is actually here staying in my guest studio for two weeks prior to her real “sit”) does not have a car.
I did tell her she could borrow my car. I/we decided we should have some sort of contract. I wrote something up that said if she caused an accident, she’d have to pay the deductible and any associated charges. (this had been discussed). I also added that the car not be driven out of town and that she not carry passengers in the car. (I added these things for safety and liability reasons) …
She became visibly upset with me when I presented her with the contract. Apparently, she thinks my requests are unreasonable and she thinks she should be able to drive my car out of town and have passengers when she wants to.
Her sit starts tomorrow. Perhaps I’ve made unreasonable assumptions that my requests would be seen as normal. Given that, I’ve offered to rent a car for her for the stay where she rents the car and I pay for it. This absolves me from liability and frees her up to drive wherever and with whomever she wants (but I don’t want her taking my dog out of town!)… She’s unhappy with that solution too and is unable/unwilling to join me to go to the rental place today.
I fly out in the morning… I’m not sure how to handle this.
Thanks for any opinions/insights!
(all that said, she’s fabulous with my dog and that’s the bottom line – I’m just really stressed out about this conflict though)
When you initially discussed letting her use your car did you discuss the restrictions? It seems like it’s limited use of your car. She may be upset that you are changing the agreement when she’s already there. I’m assuming you are not in a big city or there likely would not be a need for the car. How big is your town? Will she be able to get to sights/attractions in the area that she may have planned to visit?
Yes, it’s a tourist town and there’s plenty to see here. We did not discuss specifics initially other than paying any deductibles and other expenses. I did not “change” anything - it’s just that our expectations were different and when I wrote up a litte contract it seemed reasonable to me to make those requests. I was very surprised that she found it upsetting.
Personally, I don’t think it’s unreasonable to ask that my car with only 17,000 miles on it (and dog) be kept in this small-mid sized city - with TONS to see and do including beaches, etc. It’s hardly a jail sentence, ours is a destination beach town with plenty of things to see/do.
I’m also asking not to be held liable for any injuries that any passengers might incur. (unbeknownst to me, she has been trying to settle here and has a very active social life, and lots of friends, but no car of her own at all at all and no residence here).
@DogMomster I think you are very kind to first offer the sitter your car and then offer to pay for her rental car. We have signed similar agreements, so I think you got yourself a fussy sitter. Is she suggesting any alternatives? If she doesn’t like either arrangement she should use Uber/taxi or public transportation.
And, again, systaran - I’ve (happily) offered to pay for a car rental to solve the issue. She can drive wherever and with whomever she wants that way - but that’s not a welcome solution either. (she says that money should go to a Rover sitter so my dog will get more walks when she’s gone) … :::shrug:::
@DogMomster I wasn’t suggesting that there was anything wrong with the restrictions, they seem reasonable to me. I asked if they were discussed ahead of time. It sounds like specifics were not discussed and you both have different ideas about what use of the car means. You let her know about the restrictions after she arrived. I would consider that a change in what was agreed to prior to the sit.
Her attitude that she should be able to do whatever she wants with YOUR vehicle is outlandish. She’s already living rent free (presumably) in your guest studio and now wants carte blanche use of YOUR car?
Go with your gut, fellow homeowner. We wish you the best outcome for this tenuous situation.
I am currently using a homeowners car in a beach town. He is pretty laid back and did not lay out rules, but my expectations would be pretty much what you laid out. I certainly do not find your contract unreasonable. The sitter is being unreasonable and I am sorry you are having to worry about it. A car rental might not work if you want her to take the dog places. Also not sure how you will be able to enforce the contract if she goes elsewhere. You have already given her a two-week vacation at your place and it seems now she wants more. Sad to hear.
Personally I don’t understand the sitter’s attitude at all. Do sitters need a car when sitting at your place? If so, is it mainly for getting to the supermarket and/or taking your dog out? If I was lent a car (and for most sits abroad I have been left a car with no problems - often encouraged to go off exploring out of town) I would not feel comfortable putting too much mileage on it & were I to have passengers would first ask the owner if that was ok. I would certainly pay the excess (deductible) if I had an accident. I have never been presented with a contract, so wonder if that’s the reason for the sitter’s upset?
It’s really extremely generous of you to offer to pay for a car rental but generally you can’t take dogs in rental cars or, if you do, have to ensure the car is super clean of dog hairs/smell or pay extra for them to clean it.
When I use my car in the UK to transport dogs, home owners never think of offering me petrol money, and I wouldn’t expect it but it would be nice to be offered….
Hi @DogMomster and welcome.
Thanks for posting this.
If I offered my car, I would have collected the deductible up front with the clear understanding it is refundable. And would have made sure my insurance was intact (if something happened…my friend borrowed my car…)
I tend to do things with no strings attached and believe that I can handle whatever comes my way.
So I would express my preferences and hope they are honored.
Meaning…if you are not around to “enforce” your preferences…you got to let go and carry on…
In short:
You reached an agreement for her use of the car *
You’re changing the agreement by adding terms at the last minute **
Sitter is upset at these changes***
*The agreement was use of the car and pay the excess if its damaged That’s pretty much it.
**These are new and last-minute conditions. They are reasonable if discussed in advance but you didn’t do that, so they aren’t.
***Sitter has a reason to be upset
You have some options:
Get her to sign an agreement with added terms that probably won’t be valid and may get ignored. Sitter is more upset than currently. Dog probably unhappy.
Sign an agreement with only original discussed terms. Sitter much less upset. Dog probably happy.
Cancel sit. Cancel trip. Sitter unhappy. You unhappy. Dog probably happy. Everyone out of pocket.
My recommendation is go for the first one. IANAL (I am not a lawyer) but i don’t see how the sitter carrying passengers and driving out of town makes you as the car owner liable for anything when she is the driver. And you have insurance.
PS It’s really generous of you to have her spend 2 weeks in your guesthouse before the sit.
I’m not sure where you are, but I’m in the UK, and while I think you are very kind for offering your car, I would have presumed that by offering your car I could get out of the city if I wanted to visit somewhere specific, as getting around a city is easy by public transport or taxis.
Maybe she has family that live outside the city. Or perhaps if she’s came from a large distance away which involved higher expenses to travel to your place in the first place, then maybe that’s why she’s upset, as she would have planned where she’d like to visit and she was totally happy to take your dog with her, but even with a hire car she will probably know your dog is unlikely to be allowed. While she probably wouldn’t have minded if she knew this upfront, she would have been totally fine with it… you didn’t tell her.
You are a beautiful person for offering your car, and a hire car and never forget that, you are a superstar! But only telling her about the restriction after she has arrived at your place is an oversight, that’s why she’ll be upset, you’ve sprung it on her only after she’s arrived. She is probably a very nice person (from what you have said), but we all have ideas in our minds of what we are going to do when we arrive in a new place, and that all changed, and it doesn’t sound like she is getting angry, she is upset, which means she’s probably feeling let down.
What about offering a dog walker for a couple of days so she can go wherever she wants with the rental car? Maybe that would help. I’m out of other ideas.
But as for having other friends in your car… it would never enter my head to have anyone else in a car that an HO had kindly offered me, unless I had already asked permission.
It sounds as though you have been more than generous in offering usage of your car, or alternatively hiring a rental car on a sitter’s behalf (in which case it might be wise to have the sitter do this in their own name and give them the money, otherwise if your name is on the contract presumably you will be liable for any costs should they have a bump or damage the rental car in any way?) If someone is as unwilling as you have described to work with you BEFORE anything has gone wrong, I can only think that things would be even worse in the event of damage to your car or a rental car.
And as for suggesting that the money that you’ve offered to pay for a rental car should be used to pay a Rover sitter to walk the dog whilst your own sitter is out exploring – she seems to be completely missing the point of THS and why she’s there in the first place! If it’s not too late, I’d cut out the middleman and use the money to pay a sitter if necessary on this occasion – at least they might have a more professional approach to the situation.
You make generous offers, but have changed the parameters of your exchange at the last minute, which apparently has disrupted plans that your sitter has made.
At this point, you can either work out a mutual compromise, stick with original terms or cancel the sit.
For the future, it’s best to make clear upfront the parameters of whatever you’re offering and to find a sitter who’s willing to go along with that. Given what you’re offering, you’d probably find many willing sitters.
ABSOLUTELY NOT ! IS SHE CRAZY. I would report her and see if by chance you can get someone else. Its not up to her to negotiate these kinda terms. She probably wants to party and stay out late since spring break is coming could be on her mind. Im really sorry for this situation. She shouldn’t have joined this site if she has no intention of caring for animals. Shes not a good fit for this job. Do you have anyone else you couldn’t consider? And tell her to leave .
If she has friends then they should drive her. Im all for the pet owner. She came to sit thats her main job, and she shouldn’t be leaving the dog in a car all day or house all day. Knowing that shes moving there and didn’t tell you, ifeel i would feel betrayed. She’ll have plenty of time to get acquainted with the city once she moves there but not on a job that requires her taking care of someones animal.
Contrary to what done others are saying I dont think you are “changing” anything at the last minute. You are imposing limits that the sitter assumed would not apply. You also made assumptions - that she wouldn’t object to reasonable (in my view) restrictions. You are being extremely generous in offering her your guest house and in offering to pay for a rental car. It’s bizarre that she doesn’t like the rental car idea.
She sounds very high maintenance and demanding. Let us know what you do.
Imposing limits is changing things. As with most issues that seem to crop up between owners and sitters it’s not the fact that someone wants something done or wants it done in a certain way, it’s that it’s presented at the last minute where the other party doesn’t really have a choice in accepting or not.
What exactly would you report her for? Honoring the agreement she made and expecting the owner to do the same?
It’s up to both parties to negotiate these terms. They did so. Now one party wants to alter them at the last minute.
The OP has said she’s fabulous with her dog but now you know she has no intention of caring for animals? It’s also not a job. If it were a job there would be a contract, payment, agreed terms and if there were a company car you would probably be allowed to drive it out the city with a passenger.