Sitter now asking to have family stay

Every host is different like every sitter is different so its pointless worrying about how or when to ask a question that is important to you.

All you can ever do it be yourself and be as considerate as you possible can be.

We are all put on the spot many times throughout out lives and we learn to deal with it.

In fact it happens nearly every time i buy something now with do i want to make a donation to the shops chosen charity.

So If you can imagine a scenario happening in the future then you can prepare for it now even if the preparation is to reply "ill give it some thought and get back to you’

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That Q about donating is easy for me: No, thanks. That’s because I choose my donations based on the nonprofits and causes I prioritize and I donate in lump sums. And I don’t see why I should connect my donations to any business, acting as a middleman. That will only encourage more businesses to solicit us for money to boost their corporate brand.

That decision I made exactly once and it applies for all such solicitations. That’s different from say sits, because they all differ and one person’s sense of consideration isn’t necessarily another’s. In those cases, you want to “read the room,” as they say. There’s no cookie-cuttering for that.

Exactly that decision is easy for you but not for everyone.

For others the decision around having guests is easy because they have confidence in the sitter that they have chosen so they can easily say yes. Or its easy because they’ve already discussed it and are confident to say no.

Different people, different things are easy and different things are hard.

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Yes. That’s why I responded from my POV. I never mentioned everyone, so that seems a distraction to me.

Most of sitting isn’t black and white. Folks who struggle with grays, boundaries or communications will often have hard times with sitting. We see it time and again when tales of sits gone wrong are discussed.

Sitting is actually usually low stakes, though. So say if you don’t feel comfortable with something and decline, what’s the worst that happens? Maybe you have to cancel your vacation? Even that’s unlikely, because there are various alternatives. Or say you’re a sitter and get a terrible review or rating. Life goes on.

No matter what’s hard or not for any individual, it helps to keep or (re)gain perspective.

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The worst that can happen ? Well I really don’t want to go there but a would hate a young single female sitter to not be able to say no to HOs request for say a male lodger to stay overnight.

There are always freakish edge cases that anyone can imagine. Like maybe you end up sitting for a serial killer. That’s why I mentioned “usually.” I was sure that anyone could come up with a freakish scenario. :joy:

I am a HO and had a sitter request that 2 guest join her for a weekend of the sit. The request came mid-sit so I was a bit put off, but in the end decided it was fine. I would have preferred to be asked before the sit occured. Saying yes made for a happy sitter and my pet was well looked after.

I completely agree. I find it quite invasive, I make my own decisions and make donations to the charities of my choice. I’m not going to help a company boost their brand just because they put pressure on me.

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It’s not even about just boosting their brand. It counts as a tax deduction for them, so it’s boosting their bottom line.

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What you describe is illegal in the U.S. Companies get deductions if they donate, not when they funnel customers’ donations. Who Gets the Tax Benefit For Those Checkout Donations? | Tax Policy Center

What happens to the money you donate at the cash register?

This is where you round up your bill to give to a charity designated by the retailer, and the donation amount appears on your receipt. The store serves only as a collection agent for your gift. Assuming the business is following the law, it will not include your donation as part of its business receipts, or income, nor will it claim the charitable gift as an expense.

Interesting. I wonder where I read that. I’ll have to try and dig it up. It’s good to know but I still prefer to donate directly to charities of my choice instead.

It’s a tax deductible expense if it’s a UK registered company, hence why say British Airways say “please give us your coins” on the flights as they can offset it against tax. That might be what you were thinking of @CreatureCuddler #taxoffsettingstrategy

yeah, it’s very possible that I read it from a UK source. it’s just so shady.

I sit alone and regularly ask if a member of my family can join me for a few days. For instance my daughter lives in London so it’s lovely if I get some quality time with her if she joins me for a weekend. I always ask before the sit is confirmed and my experience is that home owners have agreed each time. I always wash the bedding and make up the bed again, on the bed that they have used. :blush:

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