Here was my perspective when I left feedback which was not taken as welcome. It was an alternative to calling them out on a review for one thing that was serious, and a few things that were just a little annoying:
I really felt that they’d learn something from the big thing. That’s ultimately why I didn’t include in detail in my 5 star review, only that the cats had gotten into something they shouldn’t have, and the sitters let me know and watched the cats to make sure they were okay. But there were a number of small things that showed an overattention to some things and an underattention to others, and I didn’t want to call this out in a review but felt it needed to be addressed because sooner or later someone would call it out in a review. It was an alternative to mentioning it in a review.
I also sit and if I was doing something consistently that homeowners weren’t crazy about but weren’t mentioning in a review, I’d be appreciative of the feedback BEFORE someone decided to call it out in a review. I also host and while I haven’t gotten negative feedback from a sitter, if a sitter warned me about something I’d forgotten, for instance: “Amenities say there is a hairdryer, but there wasn’t one” I’d rather a sitter let me know so I could fix it for next time rather than calling it out in a review. I wouldn’t take it personally or feel like I was treated as an innkeeper.
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Yes. Some of the examples here would fall in the category of “hosts I hope not to meet in future”.
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I don’t think that’s funny.
@Elke, in case helpful as an alternative option … upfront two-way request for feedback.
We’ve had multiple housesits where, at the start of the housesit, the Pet Parents have openly requested ideas, observations or other input to improve their Welcome Guide, housesit experience or other topics. This has led to a two-way communication of feedback. Our impression is that the underlying motivation varies significantly … from Pet Parents that are inexperienced, to Pet Parents that have had challenges, to Pet Parents that want us to return at a later date, to Pet Parents that are simply trying to be wonderfully nice people. All related feedback has been well-received and frankly minor in nature.
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Thank you. I can assure that that my welcome guide reflects a lot of feedback collected over the last decade.
Don’t assume the worst in us! The original comment was vague and sounded like your expectations might be unreasonable. But this explanation clears things up and shows that you were not being unreasonable. It’s the nature of forums like this – sometimes we don’t realize how our writing misrepresents our real view until someone responds 
But your details here make it clear that you had communicated your expectation in advance of the situation and helped problem-solve with the sitter when they struggled.
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I think you nailed it with this response.
And honestly, it sounds like the HO wanted to dish it out but not take it. The feedback that the sitter offered in return is deemed to be petty and unfair. Gee, maybe that’s the way the sitter felt about the feedback she got?
As always, there are 2 sides to every story. We’re only hearing one side, in which the HO is blameless and the sitters are petty or defensive. My red flag is up.
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I don’t even cook very much but I find this terribly insulting, and if I did for some reason take the sit, I would feel unwelcome and unappreciated. Not everyone is suited to opening their home to fellow animal lovers. Perhaps you can find family or friends to take care of your pets. I wish you luck, but THS may not be the match for your needs.
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